Why is Physical Attractiveness So Desirable...?

[kaylan]

Is it really the same reason though...? Let's speak very broadly and say that the restaurant burger provides a better overall experience as the collective of taste, restaurant ambience, health, etc. Can you honestly say that a more physically attractive woman would provide you with a better female experience than a less physically attractive woman...?

Total experience is not the issue. Especially considering many people will fork over extra cash for certain food from better well known establishments or areas. In NYC, pizza in Manhattan generally tastes better than pizza in Queens, and many gladly pay extra for it. Especially if you go to a more well known place. And Im talking about just dropping in for a slice and leaving. Theres no overall experience there.

 

I dont see what you are missing here. With any species, there will always be a preference for things weve evolved to see as more pleasing....doesnt matter what sense is being pleased. Thats how animals are...we want the best we cant get.

 

Physical attractiveness is a combo of nature and nurture. And most cultures' ideals of beauty tend back up what science has found out about natural attraction markers. Though cultures ideals vary, we all still tend to have things in common with what we like.

Physically yes, just making out then having sex with a beautiful women gets me so aroused exploring her beautiful body then getting inside it

 

The few times i had sex with women i was not thrilled about physically i just couldnt get into it and my soldier barely could either

This. A woman whos total body I find beautiful, will get the biggest piece of effort she could ever get from me sexually.

Edited August 29, 2012 by kaylan

[Emilia]

I've documented on here before falling for a co-worker. There were a number of women in that office better looking than her (objectively) and I would have taken her over every one. Not in terms of personality. Just in terms of being more physically attractive to me.

 

I also met her recently and she brought out her roommate who was really pretty. Definitely prettier in a consensus. I don't even remember what her room-mate looks like, less than a week later.

 

Emotional attraction crushes good looks and it ain't even funny.

 

But then again, as I'm always so fond of saying on LS ... maybe it's just me...

 

No, it's not just you, it's everyone. It often gets ignored that attraction goes beyond physical looks.

[Emilia]

Can we stop with the confidence myth? A very attractive guy will have women throwing themselves at him. So lets be real here. Many girls have no problem leading the way if they want a guy they find very sexy.

 

It's not a myth. Confidence is part of sexy. Being 'hot' is not clinically assessed as a collection of physical traits. Personality and character play huge part in it. When the person you spot on the other side of the room and they open their mouth as you are chatting them up, you will either get aroused or think 'hm close up they don't see so attractive anymore'. That's because you assessed the full package, not just the looks.

[Eternal Sunshine]

What is considered physically attractive changes every few decades or so, so biology and survival have little to do with it.

[kaylan]

It's not a myth. Confidence is part of sexy. Being 'hot' is not clinically assessed as a collection of physical traits. Personality and character play huge part in it. When the person you spot on the other side of the room and they open their mouth as you are chatting them up, you will either get aroused or think 'hm close up they don't see so attractive anymore'. That's because you assessed the full package, not just the looks.

But people trump it up as more important than it is. Fact of the matter is, people attribute positive traits more readily to people they find attractive. And confidence is important but overrated. The hot guy with average confidence will generally beat out the average guy with amazing confidence. Same goes for women. Lets be real here.

[Emilia]

But people trump it up as more important than it is. Fact of the matter is, people attribute positive traits more readily to people they find attractive. And confidence is important but overrated. The hot guy with average confidence will generally beat out the average guy with amazing confidence. Same goes for women. Lets be real here.

 

Let's be real here: you are wrong. This is because it will depend on how confident the person is who is assessing a potential mate. I rate confidence very highly in others and dislike lack of confidence highly as well. Besides, you get confidence for a reason, you aren't likely to get someone 'average' (whatever your definition of average is) that confident.

 

Confidence can never be overrated. Being sure of who you are and what you want is one of the most essential traits that will get you through life unscathed. That's not to be confused with arrogance or cockiness of course.

[kaylan]

What is considered physically attractive changes every few decades or so, so biology and survival have little to do with it.

Its nature and nurture. Not one or the other. I invite everyone to read this study from a couple of years back. Skim it if you want, as it is lengthy.

 

The Science of Sex Appeal. an Evolutionary Perspective

 

Its like I said before. While the standards of beauty vary across time and culture, they still fall onto the spectrum of what science has found to be attractive traits in men and women.

 

Think of it this way. Take the numbers 1 through 10 and line them up. Now...with these numbers, you can put a title above them denoting a certain measure of physical attraction...be it height...weight...facial symmetry...torso shape...etc. Now Ill use weight as an example. 1 being super skinny and 10 being super fat. Now...numbers 4 through 7 will represented the middle 4 values...and will be thin (4) to thick (7).

 

In terms of weight...4 to 7 are a range of what we will find attractive. However...the ideal will change depending on time period and culture. But they will still fall somewhere in this range. And within this range are certain figures, that have been found through study, to be somewhat close to an average ideal. That is to say, scientists have studied various cultures and found what men and women find most attractive on average. Thats how they pin down that a certain ratio in a mans V shaped torso is most sexy, or that a particular ratio of hour glass shape in women is most sexy...on average.

[Eternal Sunshine]

Preference for confidence is subjective.

 

I am not confident myself and find other non-confident people sweet. If anything, confidence is a turn off to me.

[kaylan]

Let's be real here: you are wrong. This is because it will depend on how confident the person is who is assessing a potential mate. I rate confidence very highly in others and dislike lack of confidence highly as well. Besides, you get confidence for a reason, you aren't likely to get someone 'average' (whatever your definition of average is) that confident.

Average confidence doesnt mean someone is a shlub with no confidence. You follow? And some people have more confidence than others. Its not an "either you have it or you dont" kind of thing.

 

It is rather measurable. People can see who has more confidence than the other. So again I say...the hot guy who has average confidence (knows who he is, what he wants, believes in himself) will generally fair much better than the average looking guy with great confidence (same values as the hot guy, but goes through greater lengths).

 

Example... the hot guy will walk up to 2 great looking girls in the bar/club and say "hows it going?". It takes confidence for a man to walk up to two women alone and start a conversation. The average looking guy with greater confidence might just be daring enough to grab the girl away from her friend and try to dance. They both have confidence...but one act takes a bit more confidence. Ten bucks says that the hot guy will still fair better...especially considering that people get away with stuff like that more easily if they are deemed highly attractive.

Confidence can never be overrated. Being sure of who you are and what you want is one of the most essential traits that will get you through life unscathed. That's not to be confused with arrogance or cockiness of course.

It is overrated. I didnt say it didnt matter. Im saying its not the end all and be all to attraction that everyone makes it. Do you know what overrated means? Do you watch sports? Take a footballer like David Beckham. Hes a GREAT footballer...but hes vastly overrated. Hes touted as an all time great...but when you think about it, he hasnt done much in terms of European club trophies and for country at the Euros or World Cup.

 

Something can be important but still be overrated. Beckham is a great footballer, but there are many who were as good, if not better than him during his prime years.

Edited August 29, 2012 by kaylan

[manup]

I don't know if I can buy the biological argument...if it were true, then we'd be heading towards the extinction of physically unattractive people, as they would be evolved out of the gene pool...

 

This isn't true at all, consider things like rape, war, and resources which at sometime or another have been viable way to pass on genes. Beauty definitely is something that changes based on the time and social climate but it's important nonetheless. You also need to consider gene variation I know really ugly girls with sisters who are hot as ****. Also consider that assortive mating used to be the norm.

[manup]

Average confidence doesnt mean someone is a shlub with no confidence. You follow? And some people have more confidence than others. Its not an "either you have it or you dont" kind of thing.

 

It is rather measurable. People can see who has more confidence than the other. So again I say...the hot guy who has average confidence (knows who he is, what he wants, believes in himself) will generally fair much better than the average looking guy with great confidence (same values as the hot guy, but goes through greater lengths).

 

Example... the hot guy will walk up to 2 great looking girls in the bar/club and say "hows it going?". It takes confidence for a man to walk up to two women alone and start a conversation. The average looking guy with greater confidence might just be daring enough to grab the girl away from her friend and try to dance. They both have confidence...but one act takes a bit more confidence. Ten bucks says that the hot guy will still fair better...especially considering that people get away with stuff like that more easily if they are deemed highly attractive.

It is overrated. I didnt say it didnt matter. Im saying its not the end all and be all to attraction that everyone makes it. Do you know what overrated means? Do you watch sports? Take a footballer like David Beckham. Hes a GREAT footballer...but hes vastly overrated. Hes touted as an all time great...but when you think about it, he hasnt done much in terms of European club trophies and for country at the Euros or World Cup.

 

Something can be important but still be overrated. Beckham is a great footballer, but there are many who were as good, if not better than him during his prime years.

 

You are very right. Confidence leaving you unscathed in life? One of the sillier things I've heard in a long time.

[ascendotum]

I only coo at my cat. But my cat is very attractive

 

Very attractive, lol...all cats look pretty much the same. It would be easier for many if humans looked a lot more alike, but I guess we do from other races perspective. I don't fully buy the 'identify genetic health' aspect when it comes to looks. It does not correlate to intelligence, and the eskimos, afganies, papuans, ethiopians, mongols, peruvians, don't win any beauty contests but they continue to survive in tough conditions. The british....they were a super power a few centuries back, and they certainly didn't get there there because of their looks.

For some animals its the most vibrant that wins out, but for others its the stongest or most determined. For humans I think most of it its hardwired but definitely some is from social conditioning.

I actually prefer your new avator hokie, only coz I couldn't stand the last one.

[EasyHeart]

Physical attractiveness is like a good resume: it will get you into the door, but it won't get you the job. And it definitely won't get you the promotion.

[Leigh 87]

Let's be real here: you are wrong. This is because it will depend on how confident the person is who is assessing a potential mate. I rate confidence very highly in others and dislike lack of confidence highly as well. Besides, you get confidence for a reason, you aren't likely to get someone 'average' (whatever your definition of average is) that confident.

 

Confidence can never be overrated. Being sure of who you are and what you want is one of the most essential traits that will get you through life unscathed. That's not to be confused with arrogance or cockiness of course.

 

 

An average looking girl with a great body can get plenty of attractive men interested, if she likes who she is enough to be proud of herself, and assume that no hot guy could possibly go for HER.....

Confidence works for me. I am not model material yet I get plenty of very attractive guys to like me ( shame I am not single haha) I really like who I am as a person, and it shows in real life. The fact I am not perfect and not beautiful to all men, does not stop me from thinking I can get any guy. I assume ANY guy could find me good enough for them.

I realize better looking girls get better looking guys, however, I never rule myself out; I am just me, and the times that attractive guys like me, I do not have the attitude of " well, I am not that hot, therefore they just want to use me for sex". I believe anyone could like me, regardless of how they look, albiet I do not EXPECT hot guys to like me. I just do not act surprised when they do, or assume their dubious characters.

 

I digress; you HAVE to be at least average for the confidence TO attract good looking partners... you know, they cannot be physically repulsed by you, and have to me attracted to you to SOME degree, even if they are not as attractd to you as some model type they normally date.

One guy always dated models/skills girls, and ended up liking me. He said he always thought skinny girls were the sh*t, but then tried me out ( thin not skinny) and ended up changing his mind; the reason he WENT for me, he admitted, was my personality, and the fact he thought I was attractive, but was still not the usual type he went for.

 

The attitude of " I think I am worthy enough to be loved, even by goo dlooking men" goes a long way....

 

 

 

.... These men probably like to look at a beautiful girl every morning too when they wake up next to their partners... I guess they looked at me as a person they could grow to potentially love, and we all know love makes a mildly pretty girl BEAUTIFUL lol....

[FitChick]

I don't know if I can buy the biological argument...if it were true, then we'd be heading towards the extinction of physically unattractive people, as they would be evolved out of the gene pool...

 

Oh but they are. My mother said people today are much more attractive than when she was young. Look at old photos and you can see it's true. Even many obese people have attractive faces. You always hear "She has such a pretty face, too bad about..."

 

With all the threads about looks on here, I can't believe the OP, who has started many of them himself, would start yet another one.

[FitChick]

It has been shown that lean women with a small wait and a nice hourglass shape (waist to hip ratio of 0.7) are very healthy. We are programmed to improve whatever genes we leave on the planet. These woman have low incidence of diabetes, stroke and heart attack. Furthermore women with nice hips are perceived as more fertile than woman with very narrow hips or a wait to hip ratio that is close to unity.

What is the male ratio equivalent?

[AD1980]

Total experience is not the issue. Especially considering many people will fork over extra cash for certain food from better well known establishments or areas. In NYC, pizza in Manhattan generally tastes better than pizza in Queens, and many gladly pay extra for it. Especially if you go to a more well known place. And Im talking about just dropping in for a slice and leaving. Theres no overall experience there.

 

I dont see what you are missing here. With any species, there will always be a preference for things weve evolved to see as more pleasing....doesnt matter what sense is being pleased. Thats how animals are...we want the best we cant get.

 

Physical attractiveness is a combo of nature and nurture. And most cultures' ideals of beauty tend back up what science has found out about natural attraction markers. Though cultures ideals vary, we all still tend to have things in common with what we like.

This. A woman whos total body I find beautiful, will get the biggest piece of effort she could ever get from me sexually.

 

Not to derail thew subject but pizza in the outer boroughs is just as good as Manhattan..

 

Ever have pizza in Howard beach? its as good as anywhere in Manhattan:p

[FitChick]

Slightly less than 1.

 

Anything over 1 in men and woman is considered unhealthy, more so in women.

 

BTW, a woman with a ratio of 0.9 may be at risk whereas 0.9 for a male would be ok.

I'm confused. Please give examples of a man's measurements to illustrate your point. We know a woman probably has a 10" smaller waist than hips but what about men? Is their shoulder or chest size taken into consideration? Length of leg to torso?

[EasyHeart]

iirc, those studies showed people outlines of figures and they found that the figures that people found attractive fell into a fairly narrow range, ie that they were not culturally dependent as some people had assumed.

 

They translated the figures into waist/hip ratios for women and shoulder/hip ratios for men.

[ThaWholigan]

I'm confused. Please give examples of a man's measurements to illustrate your point. We know a woman probably has a 10" smaller waist than hips but what about men? Is their shoulder or chest size taken into consideration? Length of leg to torso?

It's something like 1:1.618 waist-to-shoulder ratio.

[SteveC80]

So weve come to the conclusion in this thread and its what i always said that blah and unattractive looking people dont think their partner is hot theyre with them because its all they can get and they needed sex and emotional support and love..and that all of us would prefer a really hot partner but only a few of us can attain one

[AlexDP]

Jeez. OP, looks like you've only just found out about the theory of evolution.

[johan]

Being good looking makes people desirable. It doesn't make them lovable.

[BehindBlueEyes]

Survival of the fittest....nature, it's programmed into us that when we see a hot chick wearing apple bottom jeans, smooth ass and skin, succulent and huggable boobies, it makes us get hard-ons, because we want "that" to touch our bodies and we want to just force-stroke our boners into her, pregnate her and bang like no tomorrow until the climatic finish of the feeling of the glob of sweaty, thick cum burst from our penises..... We want them to whisper into our ears with her soft breath and white teeth and lucious lips.....We want her to grap our boners and slap it around and have her dress us up in leather costumes, hand cuffs and be at her mercy. Nature programs this desire into us to ensure the human race spawns new, quality, attractive, strong and healthy, human beings.

 

We are repulsed by ugly people(which unfortunatley have evolved, becasue humans are just to smart for their own good) and we don't really want them to be in the sack with us.... If that logic actually worked, ugly people would never have sex, would die off and leave the world with less ugliness and disease leaving only healthy attractive people.

However, humans are idiots and they spawn with ugly/unhealthy people regurdless.... hence all the ugly people and disese in the world.

 

A lot of people say BS to my fantasticly point blank words, but IMO it is the truth....the truth lame bleeding hearts have 2 thousand excuses to not believe.

 

Well I believe it and it is one reason I will never reproduce my ugly self....My genes wil die with me and never be spawned to another so they to may end up ugly and unhealthy.

 

Welcome to the ****ty side of life.

[BehindBlueEyes]

You can probably ascertain by my Avatar... that I get loads of hot tang!

 

 

I wish someday I could get confident in my looks, but.....not that confident.