without Posted August 28, 2012 Posted August 28, 2012 Its been some time that I find serious looking guys abit depressed and strict looking ones really attractive. REALLY. I hate myself for that cuz they mostly have problems or they are just some douche pretending to be cool. I dont wanna feel that way, but cant help it. I think I wasnt like this before or maybe I hadnt noticed it.. Im freaking out. I tried to stop it but no use its like wanting not to be interested in men at all. What is wrong with me? How can I stop this? I dont wanna be attracted to them... Im talking about just appearance, in behavior I like normal men.
Mme. Chaucer Posted August 28, 2012 Posted August 28, 2012 If you are only talking about the way they look, what's the big deal? We all like what we like. It's certainly nothing to hate yourself and "freak out" over.
january2011 Posted August 28, 2012 Posted August 28, 2012 I find serious looking guys abit depressed and strict looking ones really attractive. Would you mind clarifying what you mean by this statement? That is, what do you mean by "serious looking," "depressed," and "strict looking."
Author without Posted August 28, 2012 Author Posted August 28, 2012 If you are only talking about the way they look, what's the big deal? We all like what we like. It's certainly nothing to hate yourself and "freak out" over. Well you know they mostly have real problems. Or they are just pretending. The thing is some men act cool, like they dont care and kind of serious just to attract girls. Well if im finding them that hot then i will be an idiot who falls for those douchebags. And most girls as I saw like that kind of guys... I dont wanna be like that. Just like some guy because he looks that way. Its stupid. But its like i have no control over it.
Author without Posted August 28, 2012 Author Posted August 28, 2012 Would you mind clarifying what you mean by this statement? That is, what do you mean by "serious looking," "depressed," and "strict looking." I dont know how to clarify... hmmm like the ones there's a seriousness or in cases mixed with some sadness in their eyes. Like they seem not to speak alot... Serious. Have something important on their mind.
Author without Posted August 28, 2012 Author Posted August 28, 2012 Are you a teenager? Lol no im not. Im 22. Actually i have read articles that women like that kind of guys but its stupid. they may just use it to get attention,
january2011 Posted August 28, 2012 Posted August 28, 2012 I think it's difficult to have it both ways. A serious-looking person tends to look and behave that way because they are not fun-loving and happy clappy. That is, they will most likely project whatever is going on inside emotionally and mentally. Having said that, another way of looking at it is that there is something about these guys that is missing from you and therefore you're attracted to it or crave it on the surface, even though internally, they are not what you're after. Perhaps plugging that gap in yourself will lead you to be attracted to a guy whose temperament is more to your liking.
Author without Posted August 28, 2012 Author Posted August 28, 2012 I think it's difficult to have it both ways. A serious-looking person tends to look and behave that way because they are not fun-loving and happy clappy. That is, they will most likely project whatever is going on inside emotionally and mentally. Having said that, another way of looking at it is that there is something about these guys that is missing from you and therefore you're attracted to it or crave it on the surface, even though internally, they are not what you're after. Perhaps plugging that gap in yourself will lead you to be attracted to a guy whose temperament is more to your liking. Hmm what could be missing from me? Can you give an example? And i mostly have problems with guys who fake it just to get attention. Or in any case those that i have seen were just a bunch if douchebags.
january2011 Posted August 28, 2012 Posted August 28, 2012 Hmm what could be missing from me? Can you give an example? And i mostly have problems with guys who fake it just to get attention. Or in any case those that i have seen were just a bunch if douchebags. Off the top of my head, perhaps there is a focus and maturity that emanates from serious guys that you wish you had. However, your dilemma is that you still want to have the fun-loving element or your inner child. It may be that at your age and in your location, you don't come across many guys who are sincere and genuine, in that their outsides match their insides. In which case, you may need to be more patient and/or move if you want to change your dating pool and still date within your age group.
Author without Posted August 28, 2012 Author Posted August 28, 2012 (edited) Off the top of my head, perhaps there is a focus and maturity that emanates from serious guys that you wish you had. However, your dilemma is that you still want to have the fun-loving element or your inner child. It may be that at your age and in your location, you don't come across many guys who are sincere and genuine, in that their outsides match their insides. In which case, you may need to be more patient and/or move if you want to change your dating pool and still date within your age group. I see... I dont like to date men my age. Even the older guys i have dated were immature. I kind of feel safer around those kind of guys, now that i think about it. But it has to be sincere. I myself am playful and I want someone calm and serious around me. is that a bad thing? that im attracted to these guys? Edited August 28, 2012 by without
january2011 Posted August 28, 2012 Posted August 28, 2012 Not necessarily. As long as they meet your current relationship goals. However, if you're looking for a long-term relationship then compatibility and your relationship needs (and his) must be given more prominence. That is, you need to look beyond attraction. It's important, but I've found that a relationship based on attraction alone is not sustainable. Your relationship needs and who you are attracted to may change as you go through your 20s and beyond. At 22, I wouldn't worry about it too much unless your relationship activities impact negatively on the rest of your life choices.
Recommended Posts