nevadagirl Posted August 27, 2012 Posted August 27, 2012 Not sure why I'm posting this. He came back to be "friends" and I knew it was BS. Saw he had a pretty new girlfriend. Said don't bother me again. He contacted me about 7 more times in a month. The last thing he wrote to me was an apology. A very lazy, half-assed apology about being a bad boyfriend. The thing is I'm not stupid and people don't just apologize out of the blue when they've been perfectly right for the past year. I knew something wasn't going right in his life, probably to do with the little girlfriend. So his apology kind of...irritated me. It upset me. Childish impulse I wrote a missed connection to him. (We have a history with Missed Connections so...) Not about loving him or anything but about sex. Sex was probably the only way we ever really connected, to be honest, but that's not saying much. I felt it was pretty obvious I wrote it. And to my surprise he responded to it. I wrote back another obvious message but then I didn't respond anymore. I really don't know why I did that. I looked again at this public FB of his and I see that the only photo of the two of them together she has untagged herself and they are no longer friends on FB. He has been posting sad love songs. So I was right. It was never about me. It was never a genuine request for my friendship. It wasn't a real apology. It was about him and his life not being wonderful. I hope she is smarter than I was and she runs runs runs and doesn't let him talk himself back into her life like I did. That being said there is no excuse for me to even entertain looking at his life. I'm a little ashamed. But part of me is gloating over his misery now. I thought I was a better person than that. But I'm not.
Jingle14 Posted August 27, 2012 Posted August 27, 2012 Not sure why I'm posting this. He came back to be "friends" and I knew it was BS. Saw he had a pretty new girlfriend. Said don't bother me again. He contacted me about 7 more times in a month. The last thing he wrote to me was an apology. A very lazy, half-assed apology about being a bad boyfriend. The thing is I'm not stupid and people don't just apologize out of the blue when they've been perfectly right for the past year. I knew something wasn't going right in his life, probably to do with the little girlfriend. So his apology kind of...irritated me. It upset me. Childish impulse I wrote a missed connection to him. (We have a history with Missed Connections so...) Not about loving him or anything but about sex. Sex was probably the only way we ever really connected, to be honest, but that's not saying much. I felt it was pretty obvious I wrote it. And to my surprise he responded to it. I wrote back another obvious message but then I didn't respond anymore. I really don't know why I did that. I looked again at this public FB of his and I see that the only photo of the two of them together she has untagged herself and they are no longer friends on FB. He has been posting sad love songs. So I was right. It was never about me. It was never a genuine request for my friendship. It wasn't a real apology. It was about him and his life not being wonderful. I hope she is smarter than I was and she runs runs runs and doesn't let him talk himself back into her life like I did. That being said there is no excuse for me to even entertain looking at his life. I'm a little ashamed. But part of me is gloating over his misery now. I thought I was a better person than that. But I'm not. And me neither, I hope 'he' is miserable as Hell every day of his life, so you're not alone in how you now feel.
SuperGeek Posted August 29, 2012 Posted August 29, 2012 (edited) Not sure why I'm posting this. He came back to be "friends" and I knew it was BS. Saw he had a pretty new girlfriend. Said don't bother me again. He contacted me about 7 more times in a month. The last thing he wrote to me was an apology. A very lazy, half-assed apology about being a bad boyfriend. The thing is I'm not stupid and people don't just apologize out of the blue when they've been perfectly right for the past year. I knew something wasn't going right in his life, probably to do with the little girlfriend. So his apology kind of...irritated me. It upset me. Childish impulse I wrote a missed connection to him. (We have a history with Missed Connections so...) Not about loving him or anything but about sex. Sex was probably the only way we ever really connected, to be honest, but that's not saying much. I felt it was pretty obvious I wrote it. And to my surprise he responded to it. I wrote back another obvious message but then I didn't respond anymore. I really don't know why I did that. I looked again at this public FB of his and I see that the only photo of the two of them together she has untagged herself and they are no longer friends on FB. He has been posting sad love songs. So I was right. It was never about me. It was never a genuine request for my friendship. It wasn't a real apology. It was about him and his life not being wonderful. I hope she is smarter than I was and she runs runs runs and doesn't let him talk himself back into her life like I did. That being said there is no excuse for me to even entertain looking at his life. I'm a little ashamed. But part of me is gloating over his misery now. I thought I was a better person than that. But I'm not. I'm going on two years single now after a 4-5 year relationship ended. I still struggle and i haven't done so well in the dating world. With that said, the best thing I have done to maintain my upward trend (yet often looks sinusoidal) in recovery has been to STOP looking at my ex's on-line life. This includes facebook, staying in contact with her friends, all of it. I had to cut it all out and it was really hard. I would be less recovered today if i hadn't made the decision to really move and cut the cord. Breakups are so much harder to get over these days because it's so easy to keep a few virtual on-line threads connected even though most of the cloth has been cut already. Sounds like it's time to cut the rest of the threads. SuperGeek Edited August 29, 2012 by SuperGeek 1
shortee143 Posted August 29, 2012 Posted August 29, 2012 Not sure why I'm posting this. He came back to be "friends" and I knew it was BS. Saw he had a pretty new girlfriend. Said don't bother me again. He contacted me about 7 more times in a month. The last thing he wrote to me was an apology. A very lazy, half-assed apology about being a bad boyfriend. The thing is I'm not stupid and people don't just apologize out of the blue when they've been perfectly right for the past year. I knew something wasn't going right in his life, probably to do with the little girlfriend. So his apology kind of...irritated me. It upset me. Childish impulse I wrote a missed connection to him. (We have a history with Missed Connections so...) Not about loving him or anything but about sex. Sex was probably the only way we ever really connected, to be honest, but that's not saying much. I felt it was pretty obvious I wrote it. And to my surprise he responded to it. I wrote back another obvious message but then I didn't respond anymore. I really don't know why I did that. I looked again at this public FB of his and I see that the only photo of the two of them together she has untagged herself and they are no longer friends on FB. He has been posting sad love songs. So I was right. It was never about me. It was never a genuine request for my friendship. It wasn't a real apology. It was about him and his life not being wonderful. I hope she is smarter than I was and she runs runs runs and doesn't let him talk himself back into her life like I did. That being said there is no excuse for me to even entertain looking at his life. I'm a little ashamed. But part of me is gloating over his misery now. I thought I was a better person than that. But I'm not. Oh wow- well ok sure you gave in a bit, but good for you bc u seem as though u have some backbone! You weren't naive to his ploys for reconnecting. I wish I woulda said no to my ex all the times he came back for "just sex"..stupid me, I let my feelings get the best of me. I wish I could take back all of the kind, heartfelt things I said bc he didnt derserve them. Honesty is not the best policy here, in fact, it gets used against us!Don't feel as though you are not a better person, I would love to see my ex get a little roughed up..kid doesnt even know what a broken heart is. He got dumped by his gf that he left me for and he wasnt sad, he just moved alone to the next victims...but boy did I want to see him hurt, so I dont think we are terrible people....sometimes people just really need to get a little reality check..like our exes, and we'd love to be there for the show 1
toffeecream77 Posted August 29, 2012 Posted August 29, 2012 You are the better person! Please don't think so otherwise! You are human...nobody is perfect. But you're a far stronger person who wants a better life than this loser can offer you. Chin up! 1
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