pineapples Posted August 26, 2012 Posted August 26, 2012 Okay, I know this is silly (I really do), but..... My 35 year old ex has blocked me on Facebook. Probably I won't be able to sleep tonight. I think it is a bit childlish... Why would he do that? Is it anger? Or a way of moving on? Hate to admit but hurts a bit.
gullibleme Posted August 26, 2012 Posted August 26, 2012 Well who knows ...I blocked my ex because I wanted to move on...I am the dumpee. Have no idea whether he even knows it or not...don't care actually. It is my way to move on and frankly I hope it stings him a bit if he does notice
Author pineapples Posted August 26, 2012 Author Posted August 26, 2012 Well, thank you for sharing that. How long after break-up did you block him? Immediately, or some time later? I am just curious.
gullibleme Posted August 26, 2012 Posted August 26, 2012 About a month later I would say...once I found out he was with another girl...what about you? We were together a little more than a year.
Canadian731 Posted August 26, 2012 Posted August 26, 2012 She is probably just trying to move on and doesn't want to leave Facebook as an open line of communication. I didn't block my ex (I WAS the dumpee at the Start) but I have removed her, her mother, her sister and such just to completely get her out of my life as much as I do love her family it's just too soon to talk with them.
Tree_Salmon Posted August 26, 2012 Posted August 26, 2012 Okay, I know this is silly (I really do), but..... My 35 year old ex has blocked me on Facebook. Probably I won't be able to sleep tonight. I think it is a bit childlish... Why would he do that? Is it anger? Or a way of moving on? Hate to admit but hurts a bit. You should be happy. Why are you checking your ex's page anyway? I instantly blocked everything about my ex. Out of sight out of mind really does work in this case. And it needs to be this way. For now at least. You'll probably see them again. 3
Sav Posted August 26, 2012 Posted August 26, 2012 i blocked my ex too. I really miss her and such but it would hurt more if i kept checking up on her, hence i blocked her. I would think its ur ex's way of protecting himself
gullibleme Posted August 26, 2012 Posted August 26, 2012 I know what you mean by seeming childish and I agree to a point. I am 48 fricken yrs old and really struggled to do it but I had to and it is really helping me tremendously. I had to even go as far as tell him I had hate for him right now in our last e-mail in July ( I don't really) simply because he wouldn't stop with the every other week "how are you" texts. He was stringing me along for months and thats the only way I could start to move on. Everyone deals in their own way...I still have his family members on my FB...we don't talk at all, they are the ones I have the hardest time even unfriending go figure...Life goes on.
darkmoon Posted August 26, 2012 Posted August 26, 2012 one of mine unblocked me out of the blue i'd all but foegotten him!
Author pineapples Posted August 26, 2012 Author Posted August 26, 2012 (edited) Thank you all for replying. Nice to read the 'blockers' perspective. Tree_Salmon, I wasn't checking his account. I just noticed that his account was missing (noticed from missing comments on one of my pictures). I thought he deleted his account, and it made me sad a bit that he was gone from FB forever. Can't help it, just felt this way. And the next day (today), to my great shock, I found out I was blocked. It is not that difficult to find out, really. Well, at least I learned that he still cares about me! If he cared enough to block me. I guess I wouldn't care if he deleted his account. But now when I know that he specifically blocked me, I am thinking why. We have already been NC for about 2 months, so it doesn't really change anything... Just a bit strange, that's all. Edited August 26, 2012 by pineapples
Taramere Posted August 26, 2012 Posted August 26, 2012 I've only once blocked somebody, and that was a friend I fell out with who tended to be a bit of a control freak with a spiteful streak. We had a few mutual friends, and I knew she was the type who would use that as a way of making passive aggressive comments that I'd be likely to see...so I blocked her in order to remove that power from her. As for an ex....well, if they were an active facebook user who posted a lot of personal stuff then yes, I'd delete and block them. You can't control what people post, but you can control what you see of it. Even in relatively civilised break-ups people can sometimes be tempted to play "my life is so great NOW" games, and Facebook is the ideal playground for it. Deleting and blocking is the best way for a person who really doesn't want to get embroiled in games with an ex to do it.
KathyM Posted August 26, 2012 Posted August 26, 2012 Most people block their ex's because they don't want them to check up on what they are doing or with whom. Just a matter of privacy. My sister blocked her ex husband after their divorce because she didn't want to see his stuff and she didn't want him to be able to see hers. It's as simple as that.
Author pineapples Posted August 26, 2012 Author Posted August 26, 2012 I know what you mean by seeming childish and I agree to a point. I am 48 fricken yrs old and really struggled to do it but I had to and it is really helping me tremendously. I had to even go as far as tell him I had hate for him right now in our last e-mail in July ( I don't really) simply because he wouldn't stop with the every other week "how are you" texts. He was stringing me along for months and thats the only way I could start to move on. Everyone deals in their own way...I still have his family members on my FB...we don't talk at all, they are the ones I have the hardest time even unfriending go figure...Life goes on. Wow. It totally makes sense and I am happy to hear that it has helped you a lot in moving on.
barese1 Posted August 26, 2012 Posted August 26, 2012 I blocked my ex. It was for me. I wanted to move on and heal and knowing the temptation to see their profile was only going to hinder me. Plus if you only delete you see past posts, and other stuff I couldn't handle that at the time. There might be another reason but just saying why I chose to block
Author pineapples Posted August 26, 2012 Author Posted August 26, 2012 So basically, He doesn't want to see what I am doing. He doesn't want me to see what he is doing (and with whom). He doesn't want to have anything with me anymore. Get it. For some reason, even after months of NC, it feels really bad to be blocked like that. Anyway. Being on the receiving end of this, at least now I know what 'getting blocked' can do to a person...
Dblock10 Posted August 26, 2012 Posted August 26, 2012 who dumped who then? yeah i have been thinking of blocking my ex, but haven't as i have just removed info from popping up or things she is tagged in.
gullibleme Posted August 26, 2012 Posted August 26, 2012 Usually the dumper thinks friendship is such a great idea...tried that and it doesn't work. It only prolongs the healing process...maybe in time like darkmoon said out of the Blue I will be able to unblock him and be friends...I suspect maybe that's why she has been unblocked...til then out of sight out of mind does work to a point...not to say the hurt doesn't come and go, but we get stronger with time
It's Just Me Posted August 26, 2012 Posted August 26, 2012 Block? I follow a strict scorched-earth policy. I completely cleanse the person from my life, including FB. Unfriend, delete all comments, delete all photos. You never existed. If we somehow connect by pure chance in the future, fine. I might even say hello. Other than that, I want no reminders of your existence, nor should you have any of mine. This is my policy, whether I'm the dumper or the dumpee. Works like a charm for moving on - for me, at least. 1
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