K4RM4 Posted August 26, 2012 Posted August 26, 2012 My girlfriend hates me touching her. If I so much as even attempt to put my arms around her, even in private, I get an earful about how "shes not touchy". This might seem kind of backwards with the male being the "touchy" one in the relationship but hey, I like to be loved. I dont think in the entire 10 months weve been dating shes ever initiated a hug or kiss. Its that bad. The thing is, she cant seem to understand why I like being touched and I cant understand why she doesnt. I think its really frustrating for the both of us. Im not that needy. I dont expect to make out or be smothered in public, but in the privacy of a home, whats the harm? Im not trying to initiate sex (she says no sex before marriage anyway); I just want to....cuddle. Ive even reassured her that I will wait until marriage for her and that she never has to worry about me ever pressuring her. I tell her that a little physical intimacy goes a long way. Its a way for me to express my love other than buying her gifts, taking her out on dates, or any of the other things I do for her. Without it, its just like being good friends and I wish to be more than that. So for those of you who arent "touchy", what are your reasons for being that way and for those who are like me, why do you like being physical? *One confusing thing for me is, in the embyronic stages of our relationship (1-3 months), we would make out quite often, going so far as to me getting some booby action, but that stopped completely and its been like 3 month since the last time we hooked up. Sorry if i sound a little immature, Im a youngster (18).
TaraMaiden Posted August 26, 2012 Posted August 26, 2012 Sweetheart - this is a no-brainer... she's either sexually repressed, or asexual, and has little or no interest in anything physical. Don't even think about marriage at your age, and especially, not with her. Things will never improve, in fact, demonstrably, they will get worse. I hate to say it - but you need to up sticks and go for someone who is more likely to share a love of what you love. Because this one isn't pressing any of your buttons -and at your young age - that's a tragedy in the making. Sorry. Quit this now, seriously. 1
madjac74 Posted August 26, 2012 Posted August 26, 2012 the fact that you said embryonic stage and booby action in the same sentence is why she doesn't want you to touch her. 1
marilla Posted August 26, 2012 Posted August 26, 2012 weird that is all i can say. She is acting strange, not even a kiss? wow. She is either afraid that this is going to get out of hand and you go all the way or she isn't as sensitive and warm as you are. Or maybe even not interested enough. So you can find out by asking her nicely. Tell her your needs, that you totally can exercise self-control and that you care and love her. Let's see what she has to say. Of course talk to her nicely. And don't rush into anything more serious with this woman as i have to admit that whatever her reason this is something really strange.
oaks Posted August 26, 2012 Posted August 26, 2012 My girlfriend hates me touching her. Ditch her. Find someone else. 4
tigressA Posted August 26, 2012 Posted August 26, 2012 Go to the marriage section and read some posts/threads about sexless marriages. I'm sure you don't want to be one of those guys down the road. Let her go and find someone who likes what you like. 1
FitChick Posted August 26, 2012 Posted August 26, 2012 She might be a lesbian but isn't fully aware or refuses to acknowledge it.
Greznog Posted August 26, 2012 Posted August 26, 2012 Sometimes relationships end up sexless after the woman initially pretended to be into sex so the guy was duped. In this case she isn't even trying to con you. Unless you're content being brother and sister, leave her now.
the_Grinch Posted August 26, 2012 Posted August 26, 2012 I'm not a touchy guy. In looking at it, it has a lot to do with my parents. My family are not huggers, we just never do it. At this stage in the game I've become more of a hugger do solely to the fact that my friends are huggers. That being said it still proves awkward for me. As for your girl, sounds like she is losing interest. I have a friend who went through the same thing. For years they were fine, but at some point she changed and just didn't want to do anything. I'm not just talking physically, she didn't even want to socialize with their friends. Time to move on.
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