esstea Posted August 26, 2012 Posted August 26, 2012 I won't be seeing my boyfriend because he will be studying abroad for 7 months. We both decided to do the long distance relationship but I can't help but feel sad ALL the time. Like something is just missing... It's the worst feeling in the entire universe not being with the one you love. I even try distracting myself but nothing works. Has anyone not seen their girlfriend/boyfriend for long amounts of time? What are your experiences? Any tips/words of advice?
wtfe Posted August 26, 2012 Posted August 26, 2012 I have a similar deal with my girl. Trust is not an issue, the emptiness is. Distance does not make the heart grow fonder. I wish I had some advice, but I will just be looking for some as well.
HeavenOrHell Posted August 26, 2012 Posted August 26, 2012 (edited) 4 months because things weren't great for a while, usually we're lucky as it's every other month. I would find more than four months difficult, but it's do-able if it's a one off/if the end is in sight. How much contact do you have? Just keep in touch in as many ways as you can, as often as you can, it does help, I don't often miss him too much as we talk every day which makes us feel closer, feels like he's here with me in my heart, which is the main thing, corny as it sounds. And planning and looking forward to seeing him again helps as well. And keeping busy, and doing lots of sociable things helps me, make sure you have a life there and don't let your happiness depend on your bf. Time will go more quickly the busier you are. Good luck! I won't be seeing my boyfriend because he will be studying abroad for 7 months. We both decided to do the long distance relationship but I can't help but feel sad ALL the time. Like something is just missing... It's the worst feeling in the entire universe not being with the one you love. I even try distracting myself but nothing works. Has anyone not seen their girlfriend/boyfriend for long amounts of time? What are your experiences? Any tips/words of advice? Edited August 26, 2012 by HeavenOrHell
justwhoiam Posted August 26, 2012 Posted August 26, 2012 I won't be seeing my boyfriend because he will be studying abroad for 7 months. We both decided to do the long distance relationship but I can't help but feel sad ALL the time. Like something is just missing... Him not being physically there with you is a fact you have to deal with. It's hard, but I don't let it affect me too much. I know it gets bad when things go wrong between us. That really makes me sad beyond the conceivable. A misunderstanding, an unmet need, chagrin and disappointment, those are the things that make me sad, because I start to question things. In short, external causes don't affect my relationship. Distance is one of them. If you think distance is your only problem, think of all the rest. After all, you only have one negative and all the positives. You're lucky. Has anyone not seen their girlfriend/boyfriend for long amounts of time? Yes. Almost one year. I know I can put up with many things and the word sacrifice doesn't scare me out, as long as I know his love is there. Historically, people had to face the hard times of war, and spouses or loved ones were tons of miles away and unreachable, for years in a row too. We are priviledged. Here on LS, I've read of LDRs with no visits for over 2 years. I think that has to be considered on a case by case basis. At times, it's unhealthy and it dies on its own, other times it's true love and time goes by quickly. Any tips/words of advice? If you miss him too much, your needs are not met. Make sure they are. At the same time, make sure you know what his needs are. Start from there and see if they are compatible. There have been cases when a partner can go with contact once every 10 days, while the other needs daily contact throughout the day.
Author esstea Posted August 27, 2012 Author Posted August 27, 2012 How much contact do you have? Just keep in touch in as many ways as you can, as often as you can, it does help, I don't often miss him too much as we talk every day which makes us feel closer, feels like he's here with me in my heart, which is the main thing, corny as it sounds. And planning and looking forward to seeing him again helps as well. And keeping busy, and doing lots of sociable things helps me, make sure you have a life there and don't let your happiness depend on your bf. Time will go more quickly the busier you are. Good luck! We would be having contact hopefully almost everyday by iMessage or Skype. Depending on when we're both available since we'll be in different time zones (he's going to be 6 hours ahead). I suppose being more busy would distract me. But i'm afraid it may also throw me off balance and I'd find it hard to "keep busy" whilst trying to maintain the relationship. God. 6 months is a hefty amount of time..... But I do love him beyond words. And it is temporary. It's just going to be a god awful 6 months haha.
Author esstea Posted August 27, 2012 Author Posted August 27, 2012 Him not being physically there with you is a fact you have to deal with. It's hard, but I don't let it affect me too much. I know it gets bad when things go wrong between us. That really makes me sad beyond the conceivable. A misunderstanding, an unmet need, chagrin and disappointment, those are the things that make me sad, because I start to question things. In short, external causes don't affect my relationship. Distance is one of them. If you think distance is your only problem, think of all the rest. After all, you only have one negative and all the positives. You're lucky. Yes. Almost one year. I know I can put up with many things and the word sacrifice doesn't scare me out, as long as I know his love is there. Historically, people had to face the hard times of war, and spouses or loved ones were tons of miles away and unreachable, for years in a row too. We are priviledged. Here on LS, I've read of LDRs with no visits for over 2 years. I think that has to be considered on a case by case basis. At times, it's unhealthy and it dies on its own, other times it's true love and time goes by quickly. If you miss him too much, your needs are not met. Make sure they are. At the same time, make sure you know what his needs are. Start from there and see if they are compatible. There have been cases when a partner can go with contact once every 10 days, while the other needs daily contact throughout the day. Very helpful, i'll keep everything you said in mind! You're lucky you can put up with things like that. Long distance really isn't made for everyone but I'll put up with it. And WOW 1 year? Were things different after not seeing eachother for that long?
justwhoiam Posted August 27, 2012 Posted August 27, 2012 WOW 1 year? Were things different after not seeing eachother for that long? I'll let you know...
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