Figuring Out What is Wrong With Me

[the_Grinch]

Ok, the past nine months have been soul crushing to say the least. I've been rejected time and again, with the only common denominator being me. How do you find out what it is about yourself that just isn't working? I've been the nice guy, the jerk, the fun guy, etc and nothing seems to work. I don't have an issue talking to people and have made lots of friends in the process. I've done group things with girls I've been interested in (concerts, parties, bars, etc) and get the same thing "I had a really great time." But when I suggest something one on one, then the rejection sets in. So how do I figure out what exactly it is I'm doing wrong or what it is about me that needs to change?

[gullibleme]

Do you have a good friend that can give you some insight? I sorta have the same problem...I asked my 28 yr old daughter what it is about me that men don't approach me really...she said I don't smile enough and that I look stuck up in a way and she also thinks I am too picky...WOW...hard to hear but it helped me to realize I need to smile more at least...

[8mia8]

I've been the nice guy, the jerk, the fun guy, etc and nothing seems to work.

How about try being yourself and stop putting up an act. Even if the act does eventually work, you're going to have to keep it up for the rest of time; how tiring would that be? Just because you've been rejected doesn't mean there's anything wrong with you; it just means you weren't right for each other.

[the_Grinch]

I've talked to friends and whether they're too nice or just don't want to say anything none seem to be able to tell me anything they'd change. As far as the act, I'm generally a nice guy and that is how I would normally act. My fear is that this is either a turn off or the assumption is "no one is that nice". Granted, I can be a jerk at times (when mad about something or things not going to plan), but for the most part I try to be helpful and treat people the way I would like to be treated.