TheUnthoughtKnown Posted August 24, 2012 Posted August 24, 2012 It's 6.08am and I'm awake. I'm tired, exhausted actually, but my mind is racing regardless. Sometimes I just wonder if it's all worth worrying about. In the past 2 years that I've been posting on this alone there's been so much drama. Theories from friends, and one particularly hard hitting ex, revolve around me over dramatising everything, bringing it on myself. I'd be lying if I said I enjoyed drama, I'm just fuelled by the need to do risky, scary, adventurous things at times. I fear my life will be over before I've fully lived it, so perhaps I do act reckless at times and it has gotten me into trouble occasionally, but it's also given me a lot of memories. I don't regret everything I've done. Don't even regret most of what I've done. So why can I still not sleep? I think I'm still too hard on myself. I see friends going backpacking, leaving secure jobs to follow their dream jobs, get married, have kids, move country. I sometimes feel I'm not doing as much as them. I'm not living the one life I've got quite as much as I should. Does anyone else feel this way, at all? Is there a way to get out of your head and just enjoy the things you do have in life instead of casting jealous glances at your friends? And maybe sleep at night, again.
Anela Posted August 24, 2012 Posted August 24, 2012 What do you want to do? Can you take steps to do it? I'm not happy, but little things make me happy for a little while - taking photographs, cuddling the dogs, dancing to something. Going for a long walk, learning something new. What do you like about your life? What would you miss about it, if you made a big change? It's the comparisons to others, and the feeling that you might run out of time - I'm familiar with both feelings, and I wake up feeling anxious, even if I manage to sleep well.
todreaminblue Posted August 24, 2012 Posted August 24, 2012 What do you want to do? Can you take steps to do it? I'm not happy, but little things make me happy for a little while - taking photographs, cuddling the dogs, dancing to something. Going for a long walk, learning something new. What do you like about your life? What would you miss about it, if you made a big change? It's the comparisons to others, and the feeling that you might run out of time - I'm familiar with both feelings, and I wake up feeling anxious, even if I manage to sleep well. I think time is always on peoples minds you never know how long you have to mae a difference to see all you want to see, to meet all you may never get to meet, to be with that person who changes your perpsective on life and love,to actually experience love to fall in love to cook food with love to fidn the perfect spot to make love.....i am in a really die hard romantic mood at the moment so forgive me for that..... time is a harsh taskmaster...god doesnt give you your use by date...i made up the second part but someone famous said something about time being a taskmaster....i need more time to discover who that was....so can you sense anxiety huh can you can ya almost maybe....lol i am kidding.....maybe not....need time to find out..... 1
Author TheUnthoughtKnown Posted August 24, 2012 Author Posted August 24, 2012 What do you want to do? Can you take steps to do it? I'm not happy, but little things make me happy for a little while - taking photographs, cuddling the dogs, dancing to something. Going for a long walk, learning something new. What do you like about your life? What would you miss about it, if you made a big change? It's the comparisons to others, and the feeling that you might run out of time - I'm familiar with both feelings, and I wake up feeling anxious, even if I manage to sleep well. I'm like you: not happy in general, but the little things get you through. For me it's finding good music, good wine, films or TV series I'd never seen. Nights out with friends or my girlfriend, going to places like concerts, plays, small events. Anything to get me out and remind me that everyone feels this way. Time is ticking for all of us. Ever since I was young I've wanted to make films. I used to run around with a camera and film little plays. I thought it'd be easy to have that career but I get older I learn so much more about the world: mortality, rationality, love, rejection, the thrill of discovering something new. It's just that the older I get the more I worry I'm no closer to achieving those dreams of mine. A boy I grew up with was stabbed to death last year walking to work. Some crazy guy who claimed a voice in his head told him to do it. Only a few months ago my closest friend was stabbed in the face while on his way home with bags of food he was planning to cook that night for his girlfriend. He survived, but it was a close call. I guess what I'm saying is, I don't know how to stop worrying I won't achieve the things I want in my life, kids, good career, nice house to call my own etc, before my own number gets called.
Thierro Posted August 24, 2012 Posted August 24, 2012 Look for ASMR on youtube, it may help you sleep. It's people whispering and doing stuff trying to make you relaxed:
Ivan_the_Terrible Posted August 25, 2012 Posted August 25, 2012 Just my opinion - it appears your problem is the gap between "ideal you" and real you or in other words a gap between your dreams about yourself and reality. This "ideal you" is like an evel twin that keeps you awake at night. This is really toxic and it makes you miserable. I went through this for some time when I was younger, and I lived a bitter miserable life, when in reality everything was not as bad. It took some time to understand what the problem was. 1
seren Posted August 25, 2012 Posted August 25, 2012 For years I have had insomnia, thought this was about that initially. if anyone has a cure other than sleeping tablets, I would jump at it. as for the rest of the thread. I spent most of my life (I am 55) trying to make sure everyone else was happy, often at my own expense. There are a lot of reasons I am a people pleaser, even my job was all about helping others. Then I had a near miss car accident, H had an A and I had a chance to really look at where I was, what I was doing and what I really wanted to do, just for me. I have never sweated the small stuff, always just tried to be the best person I could be and I still hold to all this, but I am following my dream of living a simpler life, I have ditched the having to always look perfect, for being comfortable. I can no longer work, so have more time to just be happy with my lot. Our salary has taken a very steep downward curve, but life can be lived simpler. I would say follow your dreams, as long as no one is hurt by your actions, do what you want to. I once worked with a woman in her 80's, I say worked, she was a long time depressive. My job was to try to make her life better, I once asked what I could do, to make her happier. her answer changed my life, she said - I want you to take me out of my body and let me be the person i was meant to be. Of course I couldn't, but I swore that when I hit 80, I would be the person I was meant to be. That's all any of us can hope for. To be happy in our own skin. 1
Author TheUnthoughtKnown Posted September 2, 2012 Author Posted September 2, 2012 For years I have had insomnia, thought this was about that initially. if anyone has a cure other than sleeping tablets, I would jump at it. as for the rest of the thread. I spent most of my life (I am 55) trying to make sure everyone else was happy, often at my own expense. There are a lot of reasons I am a people pleaser, even my job was all about helping others. Then I had a near miss car accident, H had an A and I had a chance to really look at where I was, what I was doing and what I really wanted to do, just for me. I have never sweated the small stuff, always just tried to be the best person I could be and I still hold to all this, but I am following my dream of living a simpler life, I have ditched the having to always look perfect, for being comfortable. I can no longer work, so have more time to just be happy with my lot. Our salary has taken a very steep downward curve, but life can be lived simpler. I would say follow your dreams, as long as no one is hurt by your actions, do what you want to. I once worked with a woman in her 80's, I say worked, she was a long time depressive. My job was to try to make her life better, I once asked what I could do, to make her happier. her answer changed my life, she said - I want you to take me out of my body and let me be the person i was meant to be. Of course I couldn't, but I swore that when I hit 80, I would be the person I was meant to be. That's all any of us can hope for. To be happy in our own skin. To be happy in my own skin is what I really want. But how can I achieve that when I compare myself to others so often? It's compulsion, I don't even think about it, it just happens. It's why I worry about dying, because my friends and family are off doing the things people should do in life - buy a house, travel the world, have kids, land that dream job - and I've done none of it. Took me long enough to find a woman I could see myself with long term never mind anything else. I was having a drink in a bar with a close friend of mine two nights ago. He's just started his very first salary job in the industry he studied 4 years to get into. He's in a job he enjoys and finds motivation for, while I'm breaking my back in a bar pouring pints for old men, plus he earns over twice the amount I do. So now me and my girlfriend want a place of our own and my motivation for that is because all my friends have done it and I don't want to be left behind. My girlfriend wants us to save up some money first but I'm desperate to do it now. I have to pick myself up off the floor before I ruin things.
TaraMaiden Posted September 2, 2012 Posted September 2, 2012 It's 6.08am and I'm awake. I'm tired, exhausted actually, but my mind is racing regardless. Sometimes I just wonder if it's all worth worrying about. In the past 2 years that I've been posting on this alone there's been so much drama. Theories from friends, and one particularly hard hitting ex, revolve around me over dramatising everything, bringing it on myself. I'd be lying if I said I enjoyed drama, I'm just fuelled by the need to do risky, scary, adventurous things at times. I fear my life will be over before I've fully lived it, so perhaps I do act reckless at times and it has gotten me into trouble occasionally, but it's also given me a lot of memories. I don't regret everything I've done. Don't even regret most of what I've done. So why can I still not sleep? I think I'm still too hard on myself. I see friends going backpacking, leaving secure jobs to follow their dream jobs, get married, have kids, move country. I sometimes feel I'm not doing as much as them. I'm not living the one life I've got quite as much as I should. Does anyone else feel this way, at all? Is there a way to get out of your head and just enjoy the things you do have in life instead of casting jealous glances at your friends? And maybe sleep at night, again. Harun Yahya said: "I always wonder why birds stay in the same place, when they could fly anywhere on earth. Then I ask myself the same question." Peace of Mind begins in the Mind. Be happy where you are, then the longing and desire to 'escape' becomes a pleasurable plan, not a scheme to flee.
Author TheUnthoughtKnown Posted September 9, 2012 Author Posted September 9, 2012 Here I am again wide awake when I should be sleeping. I need to be up for the job I hate in 6 hours and I've not slept at all. I'm still obsessing over this. How can I learn to be happy with my life? I've got a great girlfriend, some good friends, and I've got a job. But my friend just got a job where he now earns over twice what I do plus it's doing what he's passionate about. I'm just wasting my time trying to get into the business I want to be in. I want to earn good money doing something I enjoy rather than loathing myself for spending so much of the little time I have doing something I hate. How do I find happiness? How do I find contentment?
Anela Posted September 9, 2012 Posted September 9, 2012 Try reading The Happiness Project? It inspired me when I read it. The author has a new book called Happiness at Home, that I wanted to buy tonight, but I knew that I could get it $10 cheaper at Amazon, so I left the store without it.
quankanne Posted September 9, 2012 Posted September 9, 2012 yeah ... those memory foam jobbers bring LOTS of sleep-inducing contentment :love: I go through bad sleep cycles more often now that I'm jobless again. I've tried my "mommy's little helpers" (OTC pills for PMS symptoms that do a great job helping me sleep), I've used melatonin pills ... but the best things I've found are making sure I've got enough in my tummy to keep my bloodsugars stable through the night, a warm ricebag that's snug against my back to help me relax and, believe it or not, meditating. Turning my mind away from my problems seems to be soothing to a point where I ease into sleep, a lot of the time it's throwing in additional prayers for those I've offered to pray for and just kicking the day over with God. Counting blessings kind of thing. I know that not all folks are comfortable or believe in that kind of spirituality, but even reaching out to the greater universe beyond can be soothing because it helps you to realize your special role in it. And sometimes, it can help make your problems appear to be smaller. some kind of good workout during the day where you feel you've accomplished something (yardwork!) or even sex can help relax you, too.
skydiveaddict Posted September 9, 2012 Posted September 9, 2012 Does anyone else feel this way, at all? Is there a way to get out of your head and just enjoy the things you do have in life instead of casting jealous glances at your friends? And maybe sleep at night, again. Ambien.....
Sauron Posted September 10, 2012 Posted September 10, 2012 I have had sleep issues for 25 years. I sleep an average of 5 hours with wakeful periods during the whole cycle. I usually wake up with my mind racing on all the things I need to do. I have tried prescrition sleep meds, not good, melatonin, valarian root tea, etc. Self relaxation/hypnosis/breathing techniques work the best for calming the racing thoughts and going back to sleep. I used to obsess about lack of sleep and now I just figure my body/brain will sleep when it needs it and don't worry about it or much of anything that I can't control. Keeping in shape, good diet, cardio work help. I also like to spark a "quality" doobie once in a while as one poster suggested. With regard to intrinsinc happiness that is found from within ourselves. We choose to make ourself happy, mad, sad, angry, etc. When I find that I am pondering what could of been I consider all the great things I have going on, the positives, I consider those less fortunate and realize that there are literally thousands of people that would trade places with me in heart beat. If you think outside of the Western World that number goes into the millions. The meaning of life is to give life meaning. 1
todreaminblue Posted September 18, 2012 Posted September 18, 2012 It's 6.08am and I'm awake. I'm tired, exhausted actually, but my mind is racing regardless. Sometimes I just wonder if it's all worth worrying about. In the past 2 years that I've been posting on this alone there's been so much drama. Theories from friends, and one particularly hard hitting ex, revolve around me over dramatising everything, bringing it on myself. I'd be lying if I said I enjoyed drama, I'm just fuelled by the need to do risky, scary, adventurous things at times. I fear my life will be over before I've fully lived it, so perhaps I do act reckless at times and it has gotten me into trouble occasionally, but it's also given me a lot of memories. I don't regret everything I've done. Don't even regret most of what I've done. So why can I still not sleep? I think I'm still too hard on myself. I see friends going backpacking, leaving secure jobs to follow their dream jobs, get married, have kids, move country. I sometimes feel I'm not doing as much as them. I'm not living the one life I've got quite as much as I should. Does anyone else feel this way, at all? Is there a way to get out of your head and just enjoy the things you do have in life instead of casting jealous glances at your friends? And maybe sleep at night, again. i am a kamikaze i don't envy others I don't think I have nowhere near reached my full potential when i have then that's the day i'm ready to meet my maker......I love success stories in anything all aspects of life......i like positives and i try to stay positive fail dismally at times the positive in that is ....through everything im still kickin hahahahahaha.....insomnia sucks doesnt it....my mind races i have problems with something i cant sleep if i am hiding feelings or wanting to express something i can sleep so i walk try and get some focus and it calms me down.....if i wake up i do something until i am tired and go back to bed......if it is really late i might read watch some tv i don't beat myself up but i do end up making up for it......by falling asleep during the day
AlanFairfax Posted September 18, 2012 Posted September 18, 2012 Yes depression could be one of the causes due to which we cannot sleep at night.
Author TheUnthoughtKnown Posted September 18, 2012 Author Posted September 18, 2012 A lot of it, if not all of it, is to do with feeling like there's so much I still need to do in life. I have not achieved many goals at all. In fact I'm pretty much wandering aimlessly through life in a dead end job I hate hoping to one day stumble upon the answer to my problems. I genuinely have no idea what the hell I'm doing in life. They just don't prepare you for that growing up. What if you just feel lost and hopeless in life? What the hell do you do then?
Eve Posted September 20, 2012 Posted September 20, 2012 Someone close to me has been suffering from anxiety and insomnia and was recommended Bach Rescue Remedy by her counsellor. She has been using variations of the sleep remedy in the late evening and the drops and cream applications during the day as needed and reports a startling improvement in well being. http://www.nelsonsnaturalworld.com/en-gb/uk/our-brands/rescue-remedy/ Take care, Eve x 1
Author TheUnthoughtKnown Posted September 20, 2012 Author Posted September 20, 2012 Someone close to me has been suffering from anxiety and insomnia and was recommended Bach Rescue Remedy by her counsellor. She has been using variations of the sleep remedy in the late evening and the drops and cream applications during the day as needed and reports a startling improvement in well being. RESCUE Remedy® - Official UK Site - Nelsons UK Take care, Eve x Thank you Eve, I feel anxiety is an awful lot to do with it. I haven't considered herbal remedies before but I'm always willing to try something new. Life is just too tough to deal with alone. Thank you.
Eve Posted September 21, 2012 Posted September 21, 2012 Thank you Eve, I feel anxiety is an awful lot to do with it. I haven't considered herbal remedies before but I'm always willing to try something new. Life is just too tough to deal with alone. Thank you. Anxiety is awful. I really hope you feel better soon. Herbal remedies can be a bit hit and miss but apparently the one I outlined has gained a lot of recognition for it's effectiveness. I had not heard of it before but must say that I am pleased with the results I have observed. According to my family member the best Bach Remedy is the one which she takes by oral administration via droplets to her tongue. She tried it in water but it was awful tasting. All in all she cannot believe just how amazingly relaxed she now feels. She was getting palpatations a lot in the day and these have now ceased. She is not out of the woods by any means but feels like she has something to help her privately when she needs a boost during the day. The cream has helped her arms because she was breaking out in a rash which I assessed as being part of the anxiety. Apparently it feels really nice. The sleeping remedy took her by surprise. I am not sure how the remedies stand up to use ove time but my family member is two weeks in and is visibly more relaxed. See trying new things as an experiment/transition and try different things. I would incorporate therapy/meditation/prayer also. Hope you have told your GP. *Hugs* You are not alone. Take care, Eve x 1
Anela Posted September 21, 2012 Posted September 21, 2012 Someone close to me has been suffering from anxiety and insomnia and was recommended Bach Rescue Remedy by her counsellor. She has been using variations of the sleep remedy in the late evening and the drops and cream applications during the day as needed and reports a startling improvement in well being. RESCUE Remedy® - Official UK Site - Nelsons UK Take care, Eve x I have a collection of flower remedies, but I keep forgetting about the rescue remedy cream. I'll have to try it. One thing that helped me last year, was a progesterone cream, but I lost it. Flax oil relaxes me, too, but with my stomach issues, I can no longer rely on something ingested that way.
Anela Posted September 21, 2012 Posted September 21, 2012 These are the main essences that I use. Tomato is one that I need to order more of, as well as lettuce. 2
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