Blastoplast Posted August 22, 2012 Posted August 22, 2012 There's this girl I'm interested in. She's 20 and going on her 3rd year of college, I'm 28 and just going back to school. I'm not interested in anything serious, but I'd like to get to know her more. She seems real into me, all my friends keep telling me this too. I just don't know if it's appropriate, and I'm only 4 months into a break-up after a 7 year relationship, so I would hate for her to be a rebound because she's extremely mature and wise beyond her years for her age. I was thinking about just asking for her number and seeing if we could meet up in the future, seeing as how we'll be living 90 minutes apart from each other and battling a busy schedule. Does this seem like a good idea or should I just avoid at all costs? Thoughts?
WonderKid Posted August 22, 2012 Posted August 22, 2012 If the chemistry is there and you guys have some kind of connection then go for it. You are in different ages but not far apart. In my opinion and through experiences I am considering cutting of younger girls like 19-23. Finding 20 year olds that are wise beyond there years are rare to find. I am wise for my age, very mature and intelligent. And young people like that would love to have mature partners because we seem to have a zero tolerance for ignorance and stupidity. If its there go for it. See how everything goes. You don't want to look back saying what you should have done.
Ninjainpajamas Posted August 22, 2012 Posted August 22, 2012 For sex? obviously no age limit. For a relationship? definitely a whole other deal. I don't find it very admirable of you for trying to gain the likes of a 20 year old, especially just to use her for a quick FWB situation. She's certainly of age to do that because she'll think it'll lead to something more even though it won't unless you were looking to shack up with a young piece of butt. But hey, women want to be treated as adults and be given the decision and option because they are "mature and ahead in their years" I give a lot of advice on this forum and consider myself a pretty level-headed man but that one always gets an eye-roll out of me because you don't learn about love unless it's the hard way for most. So here's the deal...she will definitely be a rebound, and you are undeniably emotionally unavailable. If you're going to take a stab at this 20 year old then at least give her the opportunity of when you talk to her..If she's in fact interested and wants to talk to you....that you're out of a relationship, emotionally unavailable, not looking for anything serious now or in the present future and it'll be primarily for no-strings-attached sex....that way If she takes you up on your offer you get to say you told her so, even though it won't matter because she'll become emotionally invested in you and words mean and meant nothing at that point to most women, but hey at least you did your job and for those women who marry much older men they can see their hubbies and less perverts or pedophiles even though as men we know the main driving force there. I'm not saying you're a bad guy....I mean you actually have a conscience and are thinking about this, which means you a pulse and maybe even a care for women...just don't get too carried away "older and more mature guy"...she will develop emotions for you and you will likely not very much want a relationship out of it, so don't string her along too terribly long once she clearly makes that shift from "ok let's sex it up" to "what are we?". That's my advice/input on your situation. 1
FitChick Posted August 23, 2012 Posted August 23, 2012 The important fact in this equation is not her age or your age but the fact that you are only a few months out of a 7-year long relationship. I'd steer clear of any man like that because I want something serious. You'd probably be better off dating a newly separated or divorced woman who, like you, just wants to play. Nobody gets hurt.
carhill Posted August 23, 2012 Posted August 23, 2012 IMO, perhaps casually date some ladies in her age range closer to home until you've completely recovered from the end of your relationship. I don't so much see age as the barrier, rather the combination of age, distance and your current place, relationship-wise.
Emilia Posted August 23, 2012 Posted August 23, 2012 So here's the deal...she will definitely be a rebound, and you are undeniably emotionally unavailable. If you're going to take a stab at this 20 year old then at least give her the opportunity of when you talk to her..If she's in fact interested and wants to talk to you....that you're out of a relationship, emotionally unavailable, not looking for anything serious now or in the present future and it'll be primarily for no-strings-attached sex....that way If she takes you up on your offer you get to say you told her so, even though it won't matter because she'll become emotionally invested in you and words mean and meant nothing at that point to most women, but hey at least you did your job and for those women who marry much older men they can see their hubbies and less perverts or pedophiles even though as men we know the main driving force there. I'm not saying you're a bad guy....I mean you actually have a conscience and are thinking about this, which means you a pulse and maybe even a care for women...just don't get too carried away "older and more mature guy"...she will develop emotions for you and you will likely not very much want a relationship out of it, so don't string her along too terribly long once she clearly makes that shift from "ok let's sex it up" to "what are we?". That's my advice/input on your situation. Very much so and I will call you a bad guy because you are picking a 20 year-old precisely because you know women more your age would be harder to trick into a no-strings-attached set up. When it involves 20 year-olds, it is always tricking no matter how 'mature and wise' they act
RedRobin Posted August 23, 2012 Posted August 23, 2012 Very much so and I will call you a bad guy because you are picking a 20 year-old precisely because you know women more your age would be harder to trick into a no-strings-attached set up. When it involves 20 year-olds, it is always tricking no matter how 'mature and wise' they act Unfortunately, I agree. This is part of the reason why a much younger man would have a reaalllly hard time convincing me to have a relationship with him. I have passed on a couple of good ones... who I know were sincere. This isn't one of those situations though... Not at all.
grkBoy Posted August 23, 2012 Posted August 23, 2012 I would say to give it a shot if you like her. Just be HONEST with her. Don't let her think you two will become a deep RL and then marry, when you're only looking for a lay. If you're just looking for sex, then go out and pick up a loose girl. Don't turn this one into a man-hating female because you broke her heart. If you just want to casually date, get to know her, and if "love" arises you'll let it happen...then just talk to her, ask her out, and let things go as they may. Just also bear in mind when I was 28, a 20 year-old is a different world for me. Even now I will be 39 this month, and I see guys my age picking up 21-23 year olds for a RELATIONSHIP! It's no wonder these guys later complain how their GFs want to go out clubbing all the time or are immature. Lifestyle difference.
yongyong Posted August 24, 2012 Posted August 24, 2012 let me tell you honestly. where else can you have 20 year old pussy? you are getting old and they are going to stay young. you think she is very mature but she is still 20. (they are really a Woman after 25) There is a very high chance you guys might date just couple years and move on with each others life.. don't think about too much and just have fun
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