meeji Posted August 22, 2012 Posted August 22, 2012 A friend wanted advice so I figured I would come to you wonderful people for another perspective. He says: "Hello everybody o/ I was guessing what would be the best way to approach the situation of being in a relationship where your girlfriend has a lot of other men after her, and even some of them have already their own relationships. I really don't know how would be the right way to act, if I just pay no attention to it, or what should I do. I really trust my girlfriend, and I see no problem with that, but since I don't have anyone that's after me I really don't know how should I react. Any tips or experiences you could share? =) Thanks in advance ^^"
Author meeji Posted August 23, 2012 Author Posted August 23, 2012 Thanks for your reply. He forgot to mention that his relationship is LD so, the guys doing it in front of him is not applicable in this situation. I'm sorry that you had to experience that. Being in a LDR makes it even harder because he's not there but I see where you are going with your reply. Thanks again
kaylan Posted August 23, 2012 Posted August 23, 2012 Tell him to get out now. Only a stupid woman would say things like this to make her bf insecure when he is many miles away. You dont do that in an LDR. Im thinking shes either up to something already, or about to get into something. Or maybe she wants validation because shes insecure herself. Either way her behavior is immature. 2
Author meeji Posted August 23, 2012 Author Posted August 23, 2012 Hmm. That's an interesting spin. I wouldn't automatically assume that this girl is "rubbing it in his face," as you put it. There is a line between leaving something out because it is not important enough to mention and leaving things out because they'll get you in trouble or hurt someone's feelings.The more communication this girl has with her bf leaves less time available for her to communicate with these guys that are after her. Maybe she feels like she has nothing to hide and so she is completely open about it with him. He says he trusts her so the fact that she is disclosing this information to him openly might have something to do with that. Maybe he would feel like she's keeping secrets. Say someone posts something on facebook and he sees it. The whole "Who is this guy and how come I haven't heard of him before?" is one of those things that would make any guy feel alienated from his gfs life. I think he asked her to keep him posted about these things. Maybe its unclear what he is asking. Your reply addresses the trust issue of whether or not he can trust her but it seems like he wants to know how to approach the situation. I think he needs to figure out how it makes him feel when she says these things to him. Is he asking for advice because he feels jealous and he doesn't want to be that jealous boyfriend? Is he asking because really in the back of his mind he questions whether or not he can actually trust her? Thanks again for your perspective. I will relay the information. I came up with some questions of my own, thanks to you.
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