smittenoveryou Posted August 22, 2012 Posted August 22, 2012 I met a guy about two months ago at a music festival-- Electric Forest Festival. He is 20 and I am 18. He lives in New York and I live in Michigan. We met during a show and started dancing. After the show was over we talked, exchanged numbers, and met up every day for the remainder of the festival all day. We COMPLETELY hit it off. I've never connected so much with somebody and been so content doing nothing with a guy. We held hands, laid on hammocks, walked around together, etc. all day everyday. We acted like a couple. I found myself quickly falling for him, not wanting to leave at all. At the end of the festival we exchanged facebook names and made sure we had each others numbers. We never had sex. We went our separate ways and I've never felt so empty in my life. I missed this guy so damn much it hurt. I couldn't think. I decided I would volunteer at the music festival in New York that he brought up during Electric Forest Festival. So, a week later I was in New York with him at another festival. I was a little worried it might be different, but it wasn't at all. We saw each other and it was exactly how we left off, except better. We stayed up all night talking about EVERYTHING, what we wanted with life, what happened in our lives that we should know about, what we were going to do with our "relationship". The interesting thing about me and him during this festival in NY was that we kept stumbling upon each other. Everything that happened was a coincidence (or maybe fate?) Mind you, this festival was HUGE, but by chance our tents ended up being right next to each other. Also, the first time I saw him after or separation was at this place where he shouldn't even of been because it was for volunteers (he was selling his wristband). Anyways, I went back to his hometown (3 hrs away) after the weekend festival and we spent the day together. We went hiking, got food, went bowling, and got ice cream. We left and we both cried, it was very sad. I've never felt so crushed before, and I really mean that. My heart PHYSICALLY hurt. We started talking A LOT, nearly everyday we would talk. We even talked about potentially moved out to Cali together. However, our situations prohibited us from doing so. He went on vacation and we didn't talk for about two weeks. He did call a couple times, but I know he was busy. I've talked to him occasionally since he's been back, however, I'm afraid to call, because the more I talk to him and think about him, the sadder I become. It's mixed feelings because I ****ing love the kid-- or at least what I know about him-- he's amazing. It's the first time I've known someone and liked him for him and only him. i love EVERYTHING about him, even the bad. The thing about this is that we are VERY casual-- he doesn't call as often as I'd like to talk to him, but I know he just doesn't want us to get attached to each other, because the distance between us makes a relationship impossible. He is very adventurous, spontaneous, and chill. He likes to enjoy life to the fullest and isn't the kind of guy that will stay at home and chat for hours instead of going out with friends. I've been going crazy for the past two months trying to analyze this situation. Should I call him? Should I keep it casual? Should I just break it off, because it's so hard? Sorry for the long post, but I really just need some advice. I ****ing love this kid.
justwhoiam Posted August 22, 2012 Posted August 22, 2012 So, you went bananas... I didn't understand what your deal was. You said you talked about the "relationship". What did he say? From what I read, I guess he doesn't want a GF. And most of all, he was not shot by Cupid's arrow as you were. Distance yourself from him a little bit. He will meet lots of girls, hundreds. If you are the one, he will notice. In the meantime (I know it's almost impossible), try not to change your attitude: it's what probably worked for him (easy-going, pleasant to talk to, fun to be around with, etc.).
anubis1311 Posted August 22, 2012 Posted August 22, 2012 Welcome to the LDR club where heartache is never far away from happiness!! To be honest your situation sounds a little like mine. I met a girl in Blackpool which is miles away from me. In my case i decided to put all my effort into our relationship and try the whole LDR thing. I ended up moving closer to her only for her to get a job aboard a cruise ship so it's gone from long distance to mega long distance with little or no communication. If you are like me, and you can't get the other person out of your head, then it will affect you really bad. It affects your mood, your outlook on life and everything so my suggestion is whatever you decide to do, don't let it dominate you. If you try to maintain the relationship, keep on with your life. Don't dwell on things and spend your life counting down your next encounter. It will eat you up!! If you decide not to, again...try to move on with your life. Personally i couldn't let go so i am working real hard to make it work. But she wants it too. It's important that you know where he's coming from too. If he doesn't want to put the effort in to make it work then it won't. You will crumble trying to be enough for the both of you. Having said all that, LDR can work and lots of people have amazing relationships that way!! It's about having ways and support structures to cope. In my case i have a girl who i only get to see a few weeks a year. It hurts but i consider myself lucky every day that i have someone so amazing to care about. Good luck in whatever you decide to do x
Author smittenoveryou Posted August 22, 2012 Author Posted August 22, 2012 In our talk he said that the distance between us made it impossible for us to even be together. However, he kept saying how we would continue to see each other and that it wasn't the end of our relationship. He said how he wished I was a little bit older, so that we could go off and do what we wanted to do instead of me being prohibited by my mom. He always tells me I'm beautiful and how he's going to come see me. (I know he will, at some point). I sent him a letter and painting, because we're both artists and I wanted him to let him know I was thinkin about him. He told me he thought the painting was cool and that he especially liked the letter. However, he hasn't been calling me. He doesn't have his cell phone and he probably doesn't have my number, but he could still get my number from fb. He tells me to call his house phone, but I'm worried of coming off too strongly. He is all I think about ALWAYS. And it's driving me insane. I'm a complete bitch to others because of it.
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