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Posted (edited)

Hello Forum...thank you for taking the time to read my post.

My ex left me for another guy...she gave me the news on may 20th.

She completely cut me out of her life a week after that and i haven't heard from her since. A few months have passed by and i have been feeling a little better. I begged for her back and chased her for two months. She ignored every single one of my attempts to contact her...

The last message i sent her was July 13th....I was going through a very severe depression...since the breakup my life fell apart. On those last messages i told her that i needed help and i needed to talk to her because it was serious and i had no one else to talk to. She did not respond.

 

fast forward to today....classes are starting august 27th...i keep feeling the urge to contact her with the following message " Good Luck in classes this Semester...Make sure you don't leave everything for the end this time ...lol. You got this!"

 

I feel the need to send her this message...but i am afraid that she will just ignore it and i will feel sad again...I hate that i am holding on to hope...why do i still love a woman that hurt me so bad? Should i send her the message? Will i feel bad?

 

Thank you Guys! Hello Forum...thank you for taking the time to read my post.

My ex left me for another guy...she gave me the news on may 20th.

She completely cut me out of her life a week after that and i haven't heard from her since. A few months have passed by and i have been feeling a little better. I begged for her back and chased her for two months. She ignored every single one of my attempts to contact her...

The last message i sent her was July 13th....I have going through a very severe depression...since after tge breakup my life fell apart. On those last messages i told her that i needed help and i needed to talk to her because it was serious and i had no one else to talk to. She did not respond.

 

fast forward to today....classes are starting august 27th...i keep feeling the urge to contact her with the following message " Good Luck in classes this Semester...Make sure you don't leave everything for the end this time ...lol. You got this!"

 

I feel the need to send her this message...but i am afraid that she will just ignore it and i will feel sad again...I hate that i am holding on to hope...why do i still love a woman that hurt me so bad? Should i send her the message? Will i feel bad?

 

Thank you Guys!

Edited by TooHonest123
mistake
Posted

Omg! Don't do it! Seriously. You will regret it as it's doubtful you will receive the response you're hoping for. It's a nice, supportive message to send someone, but this is someone who clearly had little regard for your feelings in the first place.

 

It's so hard to let go of someone sometimes, but I recommend focusing on doing just that. It may take time. But things will get better. You've made so much progress already by not reaching out to her.

Posted

No, do not send her the message.

yes you will feel bad.

 

very, very bad.

 

 

No, do not send her the message.

yes you will feel bad.

 

very, very bad.

 

 

 

 

you can ask twice - I'll answer twice!! ;)

  • Like 2
Posted

Don't do it.

remain in NC.

If she doesn't respond, you'll feel miserable.

If she does respond, you will get a shred of hope, and end up feeling miserable.

 

I am trying to go NC.

My thought process is still that "if i don't respond to him, he will think that i don't care, and then he'll quit contacting me, and then it will really be over..."

 

But that's the whole point. For it to be OVER.

Easier said than done. I'm trying to drill that into my head.

...then it will REALLY BE OVER. and that's a good thing.

Posted

Don't contact her. If she wants you back, she'll contact you. If not, the better. You seem to be healing and contacting her will take you step back....

  • Author
Posted

Thank you guys....I am going to remain NC...its going to be hard but I need to value myself as a person and push forward. ..

 

Sorry for double posting...i copied and pasted twice from microsoft WORD lol

Posted

Ugh... you should see some of the formatting howlers some people create when they cut 'n' paste....!

That was quite tame by comparison....

 

No, but really - You sound as if you're doing great - the best and only time to establish contact with an ex- is when you feel benignly indifferent to them.

You wish them no ill, but really - you could care less....

  • Author
Posted
Ugh... you should see some of the formatting howlers some people create when they cut 'n' paste....!

That was quite tame by comparison....

 

No, but really - You sound as if you're doing great - the best and only time to establish contact with an ex- is when you feel benignly indifferent to them.

You wish them no ill, but really - you could care less....

 

If i think very very hard about the relationship with my ex I can honestlysay i was unhappy.What gives me strengthis knowing that

 

1)I will be better as time goes by 2) I know i can be much much happier with somebody else. 3) That what happend was a learning experience that will help me grow as a person

 

Sometimes it is from our biggest mistakes that we learn our biggest lessons in life. What my ex did to me I try to take as a gift. she opened my eyes ...(not towards how i felt about her) but towards how i see life. And it made me realize all the other aspects of my life that. i was failing on. And in doing so...gave me the oportunity to now fix them.

 

Life is like a bunch of doors...we have our career door, educational door, Family door, Relationship door, Friendships door...in my life near the end of the relationship with my ex i only had my relationship door open and all my life revolved around her...so once that door closed i was left literally stuck in a room with no where to go.

 

This is my chance tobecome better. To be the Man I always wanted to become.

Posted

Love the door analogy.

I'm in the same room.

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