verhrzn Posted August 21, 2012 Posted August 21, 2012 I'm always reading in The Ladies Magazines that during sexy times, guys don't notice imperfections on a woman's body, like cellulite or droopy boobs or other things that women obsess over. I have heard from some men that when they are in love with a girl, they don't notice her flaws as much (love being blind and all.) But what if you get to the sexy times before the True Love stage? Are the magazines right, or just blowing sunshine for the sake of their readers' self-esteem?
grkBoy Posted August 21, 2012 Posted August 21, 2012 I'd say they are right for 95% of the men. That other 5% I'm assuming are so shallow they will notice and be turned off by imperfections. I still think you're a pretty girl vehrzn. You just met too many bad examples of males and potentially display a bad attitude that might turn other men off. 2
Failboy Posted August 21, 2012 Posted August 21, 2012 Depends what you mean by "notice". Men aren't as dumb as some women think, we do notice stuff. But when in bed and horny, those things don't really turn us off that much, especially if we "like" the woman. The bigger problem is being social in public. My last girlfriend was at least 3 inches taller and twice my weight. You can imagine how ridiculous that looked, especially when going to public pools together and such. People looked and talked some trash. And yes I noticed all the cellulite, the uneven droopy boobs and what not, but it's not like it is coming as a shocker If someone chooses you despite this, he will not just get his dicc back into his pants and drive off once you got naked in bed. Unless you are obviously uncomfortable getting naked, that can be a turn-off for both genders. More so for women, though. In other words, don't worry... people can be super-judgemental about all those imperfections seen on strangers or on people they don't like - but once they like someone or feel like they can't do "better" right now, they will not "notice" anymore. 1
oaks Posted August 21, 2012 Posted August 21, 2012 Are the magazines right, or just blowing sunshine for the sake of their readers' self-esteem? A bit of both.
pteromom Posted August 21, 2012 Posted August 21, 2012 Almost everyone has imperfections of some kind. And it's typical to be more worried about yourself. So while he may notice droopy boobs, it's more likely he is hoping you aren't noticing HIS imperfections. Realistic people don't expect a body right out of a fitness magazine or Playboy.
soccerrprp Posted August 21, 2012 Posted August 21, 2012 I'd say they are right for 95% of the men. That other 5% I'm assuming are so shallow they will notice and be turned off by imperfections. I still think you're a pretty girl vehrzn. You just met too many bad examples of males and potentially display a bad attitude that might turn other men off. ...or there are guys who do notice, but still don't mind as much to make a reason to dump a girl. I think a lot more men notice, but look past it because they have feelings for the girl or it's just not a big deal.
Author verhrzn Posted August 21, 2012 Author Posted August 21, 2012 ...or there are guys who do notice, but still don't mind as much to make a reason to dump a girl. I think a lot more men notice, but look past it because they have feelings for the girl or it's just not a big deal. But that was kind of my point... what if the guy hasn't caught feelings yet? Then how harsh is he gonna judge?
kaylan Posted August 21, 2012 Posted August 21, 2012 I'm always reading in The Ladies Magazines that during sexy times, guys don't notice imperfections on a woman's body, like cellulite or droopy boobs or other things that women obsess over. I have heard from some men that when they are in love with a girl, they don't notice her flaws as much (love being blind and all.) But what if you get to the sexy times before the True Love stage? Are the magazines right, or just blowing sunshine for the sake of their readers' self-esteem? Depends on the girl. A girl I really like, or love...her little imperfections will seem cute to me. On a different girl, they might kinda bug me. It all depends on who and what it is.
Eddie Edirol Posted August 21, 2012 Posted August 21, 2012 Guys do notice, but they know how fragile womens self esteem is, you cant tell them you notice it. Alot of women will just get depressed about their imperfections and not do anything about it. It also depends on a guys agenda. if he just wants to get laid, he will overlook whatever imperfections he needs to get laid. Its also personal preference. If a guy doesnt have a problem with a lil cellulite on your legs, hell know its there, but it isnt a turnoff for him. If hes not a boob guy, he might not care about saggy boobs. It depends on what he wants to notice.
threebyfate Posted August 21, 2012 Posted August 21, 2012 Of course they notice. The question is, do they care when they're otherwise focused, busy trying to get off? No.
Weezy1973 Posted August 22, 2012 Posted August 22, 2012 My current GF has more "imperfections" than any of my previous ones. I notice them, but I also get more turned on by her than any of my previous GFs. The fact is she notices them too, but doesn't care. She gets completely lost in the moment and has been the same way since our first kiss. 1
carhill Posted August 22, 2012 Posted August 22, 2012 It had nothing to do with love, though I did love my exW very much when our M was healthy, but I can honestly say the excess weight and any cellulite/age marks (we were 40's/50's during M) simply disappeared when she would recline nude as in those works of Ruben. It was just amazing. I often commented upon her beauty in bed directly to her, as much as sweet talk as honest expression of amazement. Overall, relevant to my romantic/attraction style, it has generally been a woman's imperfections which made her unique and endearing to myself when in a relationship. Aspects uniquely hers which set her apart from all other women. With each woman it (the imperfections) was different, and unique. 1
Kofybean Posted August 22, 2012 Posted August 22, 2012 I'm always reading in The Ladies Magazines that during sexy times, guys don't notice imperfections on a woman's body, like cellulite or droopy boobs or other things that women obsess over. I have heard from some men that when they are in love with a girl, they don't notice her flaws as much (love being blind and all.) But what if you get to the sexy times before the True Love stage? Are the magazines right, or just blowing sunshine for the sake of their readers' self-esteem? I notice. For sure. How could men not notice? They aren't fking blind. Or do you mean they aren't turned off by imperfections?
GLDheart Posted August 22, 2012 Posted August 22, 2012 My eyes work. I see them. But, I'm far more focussed on more important things... does she smell good, feel good, is her smile warm and genuine, is she enjoying me too, are we having fun, is the overall vibe good, etc... My recent long term ex had stretch marks on her stomach from having our baby. Also she had a bit of fat and a touch of loose skin there on her belly that just doesn't go away.... Yeah I saw it AND LOVED IT. Those were battle scars. I know this part drove her crazy she was so insecure about it but laying in bed I would put my hand on her stomach and remember everything. I would remember her pregnancy. I would remember the awkward times when we were making love when she was very pregnant. I would remember how proud I was while she gave birth with me holding her hand.... So yeah we see those "flaws"... but why do they have to be a bad thing?? 5
Disenchantedly Yours Posted August 22, 2012 Posted August 22, 2012 Of course they notice. The question is, do they care when they're otherwise focused, busy trying to get off? No. I'm not sure that's exactly a positive thing threebyfate. That they don't focus because they just want to get off! I liked what Carhill had to say on this topic. Hopefully more guys see these things as endearing instead of things they just have to put up with because they want to get off. But, there is a reason women in Playboy are airbrushed. It's not because men love imperfections. 1
xxoo Posted August 22, 2012 Posted August 22, 2012 But that was kind of my point... what if the guy hasn't caught feelings yet? Then how harsh is he gonna judge? Depends on his age and maturity, probably. 1
GLDheart Posted August 22, 2012 Posted August 22, 2012 Being so nervous, you are busy worrying about your own imperfections and you barely have the capacity to notice his flaws... Flip it around. What's to say he's not also more focussed on his own imperfections also?
threebyfate Posted August 22, 2012 Posted August 22, 2012 I'm not sure that's exactly a positive thing threebyfate. That they don't focus because they just want to get off!Do you wish men to be blind? I know I'm not blind in or out of bed. Doesn't mean that I perceive differences as turn offs. They're just an accepted part of the guy. As an example, I once lightly connected with a guy who had a few blemishes on his face. Mentioned it since they weren't a big deal to me. He did get a bit hurt but then realized that because they weren't a big deal to me, that it was all okay. It's when people need to avoid talking about something, that it becomes a big deal. Refer to the parody scene in Austin Powers about moles!
Disenchantedly Yours Posted August 23, 2012 Posted August 23, 2012 Do you wish men to be blind? I know I'm not blind in or out of bed. Doesn't mean that I perceive differences as turn offs. They're just an accepted part of the guy. As an example, I once lightly connected with a guy who had a few blemishes on his face. Mentioned it since they weren't a big deal to me. He did get a bit hurt but then realized that because they weren't a big deal to me, that it was all okay. It's when people need to avoid talking about something, that it becomes a big deal. Refer to the parody scene in Austin Powers about moles! I didn't say anything about being blind. I was pretty clear that I liked Carhill's way of seeing it. That those things where endearing. That they made his partner who she was, she didn't have to "fix" herself just because it wasn't perfect. At the end of the day, I think we all want to be accepted for who we really are. Physically and emotionally.
threebyfate Posted August 23, 2012 Posted August 23, 2012 I didn't say anything about being blind. I was pretty clear that I liked Carhill's way of seeing it. That those things where endearing. That they made his partner who she was, she didn't have to "fix" herself just because it wasn't perfect. At the end of the day, I think we all want to be accepted for who we really are. Physically and emotionally.The bolded word is part of what kills relationships. The expectation of perfection. Usually people who need their partners to be perfect, are far from perfect themselves. My husband's not perfect but damn it all, he's perfect for me. 2
all_hail_me Posted August 23, 2012 Posted August 23, 2012 Guys definitely judge. Hands down. Unless you are a drop dead gorgeous model type or they don't get ANY action, they're thinking things about you that can be deeply insulting. Doesn't help if you have issues with your body too! Sometimes it's best not to know because when you do know, it can sour your will to want to get naked with that person again. Oh well, plenty of fish in the sea.
Negative Nancy Posted August 23, 2012 Posted August 23, 2012 But, there is a reason women in Playboy are airbrushed. It's not because men love imperfections. Exactly. Very good point.
xxoo Posted August 23, 2012 Posted August 23, 2012 Guys definitely judge. Hands down. Unless you are a drop dead gorgeous model type or they don't get ANY action, they're thinking things about you that can be deeply insulting. Doesn't help if you have issues with your body too! An important distinction--a thought can be insulting to you, while not being a negative to him. Example--a guy could be thinking, "Wow, her azz is so big and jiggy". Insult, or appreciation? Depends on the guy. 1
all_hail_me Posted August 23, 2012 Posted August 23, 2012 An important distinction--a thought can be insulting to you, while not being a negative to him. Example--a guy could be thinking, "Wow, her azz is so big and jiggy". Insult, or appreciation? Depends on the guy. Lol, true! But I'm still waiting for one to be impressed by my jiggly bits!
Gabstack Posted August 27, 2012 Posted August 27, 2012 Yes, we notice but the question is which one of us is mature enough about noticing it or can be considerate of a woman's feelings upon the discovery. Each one of us is different and flaws are subjective, anyway. Besides, when faced with a naked woman, guys have other things in mind and evaluating your body isn't one of them!
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