LC1976 Posted August 21, 2012 Posted August 21, 2012 As posted elsewhere on this site: I have signed up (again) for a bunch of OLD sites. And I have begun to notice this cougar-thing permeating all the sites I visit. For example I see numerous profiles of women at are 33-34 that list one up and 10 down. Is that normal? Or is it just where I live (Washington DC)?
RedRobin Posted August 21, 2012 Posted August 21, 2012 (edited) That's not being a 'cougar'.... That's going after what the guys go after and believe they are entitled to. Yes, I think that women who don't want kids, are physically fit and active, and make good money are just as likely to go younger. Besides, they know the older guys are going to email them anyway... no matter what age range they put down. *shrug* Edited August 21, 2012 by RedRobin
stillafool Posted August 21, 2012 Posted August 21, 2012 Yeah these women want younger men just like men want the younger women. Welcome to 2012!
Author LC1976 Posted August 21, 2012 Author Posted August 21, 2012 That's not being a 'cougar'.... That's going after what the guys go after and believe they are entitled to. Yes, I think that women who don't want kids, are physically fit and active, and make good money are just as likely to go younger. Besides, they know the older guys are going to email them anyway... no matter what age range they put down. *shrug* It's not? 34 yr old woman wanting to date a 23 yr old...? Funny, but I am sure if a guy did that, many women his age would say he's disgusting. And yes, I know that guys do that. I am just saying there seems to be a doubel standard...
Titanwolf Posted August 21, 2012 Posted August 21, 2012 I don't see anything wrong with it. Mature ladies are fantastic IME. If they can, why not?.
RedRobin Posted August 21, 2012 Posted August 21, 2012 (edited) It's not? 34 yr old woman wanting to date a 23 yr old...? Funny, but I am sure if a guy did that, many women his age would say he's disgusting. And yes, I know that guys do that. I am just saying there seems to be a doubel standard... Yea... there is a double standard. Men think that 10+ years younger is no big deal. Hence the lack of a 'name' for them. I call them 'manthers' though. Just to be fair, ha ha Anyway, I'm jerking your chain just a bit. I think +/- 5 probably has a better chance of real compatibility. I'm not a fan of older people (men or women) going after much younger because there is usually a distorted dynamic. Doesn't seem likely to be a relationship between equals. Seems more like prey/predator. I've gone younger, but the guy was pursuing me hard. Takes alot of doing on his part to convince me he has serious intentions. It has happened though. Edited August 21, 2012 by RedRobin
Author LC1976 Posted August 21, 2012 Author Posted August 21, 2012 I don't see anything wrong with it. Mature ladies are fantastic IME. If they can, why not?. If they just want sex, then I don’t see anything wrong with it. It’s when they delude themselves into thinking this is going to be “Love ever after”. I have two friends that this has happened to multiple times. And now one is dating a guy that just turned 25 and she is 33. And she keeps insisting that he is ready to have a bunch of kids and settle down. Yeah…right.
fishtaco Posted August 21, 2012 Posted August 21, 2012 Why not? I don't see a problem with that. No matter what you do, someone, somewhere in the world is going to think you're disgusting. So f-k them. If it's legal and consensual, go for it. Women are more financially independent now than ever before. We'll see much more of these "cougars", and male gold diggers, and alimony payouts for men... etc. 2
RedRobin Posted August 21, 2012 Posted August 21, 2012 If they just want sex, then I don’t see anything wrong with it. It’s when they delude themselves into thinking this is going to be “Love ever after”. I have two friends that this has happened to multiple times. And now one is dating a guy that just turned 25 and she is 33. And she keeps insisting that he is ready to have a bunch of kids and settle down. Yeah…right. A good friend of mine married a man 9 years younger. They both have PhDs and now have two children. He was 27 when they got married. I've dated 11 years younger. Two years after we broke up, he ended up marrying a woman 8 years older than him. Both PhDs. He was 25 when he got married. Another guy who was 15 years younger than me chased me for years... He made it through second round of astronaut training and also a PhD... 15 years was too much for me... I'm giving you these examples to indicate that fit, healthy, highly educated men can and do marry older women. 1
RedRobin Posted August 21, 2012 Posted August 21, 2012 What's so good and wonderful about "fit" people? I'm not "fit" nor healthy. Not a judgement... Just a description and filling in the blanks. There is some idea out there that all men want younger women...
pteromom Posted August 21, 2012 Posted August 21, 2012 I don't see why there's the need to label people. So a woman is willing to date a guy 10 years younger - so what? (Same applies to men looking for younger women.) It really doesn't matter what OTHER people do. They make their choices, and no matter what choice they make, there are consequences they must then live with. If you are 30 and you don't want to date a 40 year old woman, don't. If you are 30 and you are into 18 year old girls, date them. If you are a 50 year old woman and your goal is to find and marry a 25 year old guy, good luck and more power to you. Focus on the people who are looking for someone with your demographics, and try to make a connection with the ones you are attracted to. 3
FitChick Posted August 21, 2012 Posted August 21, 2012 A wonderful film about older woman-younger man is Cheri, directed by Stephen Frears, starring Michelle Pfeiffer and a British cast including Sting's first wife and one of the Rolling Stones' earliest girlfriends. See if you can spot those two. Visually dazzling adaptation of a novel by Colette. People suddenly seem to be rediscovering this film probably because of "cougars." The novel is very old so this type of relationship is nothing new.
yongyong Posted August 22, 2012 Posted August 22, 2012 Those older women know younger guys are not going to marry them and they want someone with better support anyways. Younger guys don't mind banging attractive older woman before settling down with younger girl. so they are banging each other for each other's interest.
USMCHokie Posted August 22, 2012 Posted August 22, 2012 My girlfriend is 18 years older.....the age difference is the least of our concerns...
Eternal Sunshine Posted August 22, 2012 Posted August 22, 2012 As posted elsewhere on this site: I have signed up (again) for a bunch of OLD sites. And I have begun to notice this cougar-thing permeating all the sites I visit. For example I see numerous profiles of women at are 33-34 that list one up and 10 down. Is that normal? Or is it just where I live (Washington DC)? I have 5 up and 5 down listed. I struggle to be attracted to older men as they look like my dad...and majority just let themselves go. Even men my age are often VERY overweight, balding, grey etc. I have no issues with dating older as long as they are in good shape. Also, older men tend to be divorced and/or have kids. I am not into that if I can help it.
Emilia Posted August 22, 2012 Posted August 22, 2012 I date much younger men all the time, one was 15 years younger and asked me to marry him but being older I knew he had his life ahead of him and that he shouldn't be tied down. Still a nice gesture though There just seem to be more guys around in their early 20s from what I gather. I saw a table somewhere based on the 2011 Census in the UK and according to that there has been a significant growth in the early 20s age group while a significant drop in my own age group (35+). I take what I can get at my age. If that's a gorgeous 23 year-old then... well... someone has to do it 2
yongyong Posted August 22, 2012 Posted August 22, 2012 18 years old.....wow that's impossible for me. I dated 30 year old when I was 21. she looked like my age so I didn't have to deal with public attention plus she came with maturity. so it was win-win. I was saying to myself 'would I still like her when I hit 30? she would be almost 40 and I can still go after 22~25, she would have wrinkles on her face, not physically in good shape, I can still meet a bubbly young sweet girl in her prime physically, would I really give that up?' Both gender wants the best when they want to settle down. People say men prefer younger woman as they get older. I used to like older women when I was in early 20's (they were 25~30 range, still young age) As I get older, I am interested in 25 year and under. I think it's because I know as I get older, I won't have a chance with them. I met this woman just one year older than me but it made me think 'is this the best I can do? am I not capable of dating 25 year old and under?' It's true there are guys who marries a lot older women and there are women who marries a guy in a lower status (making less money, lower job position) but it doesn't happen a lot....... My girlfriend is 18 years older.....the age difference is the least of our concerns...
Author LC1976 Posted August 22, 2012 Author Posted August 22, 2012 I have 5 up and 5 down listed. I struggle to be attracted to older men as they look like my dad...and majority just let themselves go. Even men my age are often VERY overweight, balding, grey etc. I have no issues with dating older as long as they are in good shape. Also, older men tend to be divorced and/or have kids. I am not into that if I can help it. [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3] [/sIZE][/FONT]Oh I understand where you’re coming from. Most of the guys I went to HS with are pitiful looking. Crazy fat. But I still have my hair, I am in good shape (not crazy cut), have a really good job and make good money. [FONT=Calibri][sIZE=3] [/sIZE][/FONT] [sIZE=3][FONT=Calibri]In fact, if you met me you would think “He’s about 30ish”; when in fact I am 40. In my mid 30’s I would still get carded. [/FONT][/sIZE] [sIZE=3][FONT=Calibri]But on-line I feel that they just see my age and go “Nope”. And I am not emailing women in their early 20’s, but early to mid-30’s and sometimes 29. sigh[/FONT][/sIZE]
Eternal Sunshine Posted August 22, 2012 Posted August 22, 2012 [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3] [/sIZE][/FONT]Oh I understand where you’re coming from. Most of the guys I went to HS with are pitiful looking. Crazy fat. But I still have my hair, I am in good shape (not crazy cut), have a really good job and make good money. [FONT=Calibri][sIZE=3] [/sIZE][/FONT] [sIZE=3][FONT=Calibri]In fact, if you met me you would think “He’s about 30ish”; when in fact I am 40. In my mid 30’s I would still get carded. [/FONT][/sIZE] [sIZE=3][FONT=Calibri]But on-line I feel that they just see my age and go “Nope”. And I am not emailing women in their early 20’s, but early to mid-30’s and sometimes 29. sigh[/FONT][/sIZE] Yes, I would date a fit looking 40 year old. And yes, I am guilty of not even looking at a profile when I see a message sent by a 40 something. I get a lot of mail, and those guys are generally in such a horrible shape that I don't bother.
Author LC1976 Posted August 22, 2012 Author Posted August 22, 2012 Yes, I would date a fit looking 40 year old. And yes, I am guilty of not even looking at a profile when I see a message sent by a 40 something. I get a lot of mail, and those guys are generally in such a horrible shape that I don't bother. Well my profile pic is just a head shot. And I know you're thinking "well maybe your not very attractive". Hhaha. I'm no Brad Pitt circa 1998, but I have been told I am really cute and I have had women say my face is very symetrical. Also...babies stare at me (great golden ratio ) And its just weird for me to experience this. Last year I worked part time in a bar (I get bored easily), and I had a couple of 22-24 yr old coworks want to date me. But they are club kids and I am not into doing that five nights a week.
joystickd Posted August 22, 2012 Posted August 22, 2012 I think men and women date younger because its less baggage. Its less BS and craziness to sift through
Radu Posted August 22, 2012 Posted August 22, 2012 The problem with older women is that they hit the menopause and that is all she wrote. Thank you. As a 29yr old guy, if i want an older women [significant older] i'm literally screwed out of having kids. Wish i was 20 again.
USMCHokie Posted August 22, 2012 Posted August 22, 2012 Thank you. As a 29yr old guy, if i want an older women [significant older] i'm literally screwed out of having kids. Wish i was 20 again. And this is why I'm imagining how many Maseratis I can buy instead of having to raise a kid. 2
RedRobin Posted August 22, 2012 Posted August 22, 2012 The problem with older women is that they hit the menopause and that is all she wrote. I could say the same for older men. ... and BTW... my parents are in their 60's and still have a very active love life... But we come from a long line of very long-lived, very healthy people. IMHO, it has more to do with overall health than just age. They still act like silly teenagers sometimes... It's very cute.. but also TMI!! (thanks mom and dad!) 1
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