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It changed and I never saw it coming?


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Posted

Hey all! An avid reader but a new poster here.

 

So I have a situation for you to give me your insight. So here it goes!

 

I'm a 21 year old dude. Not been a fan of the whole "relationship" concept, I am known for spinning plates and for some occasional one night stands. But this time things got a bit different...

 

A month ago, me and two of my best friends decided to go clubbing. The two of them brought their respective girlfriends and one of them brought her 18-year-old blond HB9 sister with whom I spend all night talking and making out and we ended up having sex.

 

Even though she's a bit immature, she's very fun to be with (and extremely gorgeous).

 

The following days, the girl added me on Facebook (some of her friends did the same) and began constantly starting conversations with me and we would bust each others balls all the time. She even started to go out with my friends which was something she never did before. In all of these outings, at first she was always shy but as time went by and I started to make her at ease, we started to act like a couple (and I started to develop feelings for her). Sometimes, my friends would even start to talking about my "women experience" (exs and stuff like that) and she was visibly upset by it (which seems to me like a very positive sign). But in those outings, we never got to spend some time just the two us.

 

After the last time (last week) we got out (again in group), she has changed her behavior completely. The following times (3 times or so) I chatted with her on Facebook, we only talked for 5 minutes because she had to leave (one time, she even stayed online, after saying goodbye, for 30 minutes or so). And the last time, we were talking about some event, and I said to her " I'm going to the event and I think you should come with me". But she never spoke again.

 

Seriously, usually it's me that gives ladies a cold shower and now that I'm going "gaga" for this girl, she's behaving like a spoiled brat? What the *bleep* happened that I totally missed?

 

Thanks for the replys

Posted

Typical 18yo dramatics. Have fun with it.

Posted

Who knows? If you can figure out how women work, you'll be a gazillionaire.

 

My advice? Ask her.

Posted

So you met her a month ago and had sex with her?

 

There's a lot of fluffing around in the middle, hanging out with friends... chatting on facebook.

 

Then you ask her out for the first time one on one a month later (on facebook messenger)

 

I would say if you were truly interested you would have asked her out, by calling her, some time in the previous month, instead of being passive, perferably within a few days of the sexual encounter.

 

I would have given up on you after 3 or 4 weeks too. I mean she contacted you by adding you on facebook after you had sex. What exactly did you do to indicate interest in the weeks following? you didn't ask her out.

Posted

Welcome to Life!

 

All I can say for sure is that this will not be the last time a woman does something that makes no sense. Your only choice is to accept the fact that women make no sense. Ever.

Posted
Who knows? If you can figure out how women work, you'll be a gazillionaire.

 

Quoting my own post... and if you can figure out 18 year old women? You'll get burned at a stake becasue you are obviously a male witch practicing witchcraft.

Posted

You're 21. A puppy. Time you learned this.

 

She says: We need to talk

She means: I need to complain

 

She says: Are you listening to me?

She means: [Too late, you're doomed.]

 

She says: Sure... go ahead

She means: I don't want you to

 

She says: I'm not upset

She means: Of course I'm upset you moron

 

She says: You're ... so manly

She means: You need a shave and sweat a lot

 

She says: Am I fat?

She means: Tell me I'm beautiful.

 

She says: You have to learn to communicate.

She means: Just agree with me.

 

She says: Yes

She means: No

 

She says: No

She means: No

 

She says: Maybe

She means: No

  • Like 1
Posted

she isn't behaving like a 'spoiled brat'.. she's probably insecure about the fact that she keeps hearing about ur previous experiences with women, and she doesn't want to just be another random girl that u date and ditch afterwards. if it's not too late, then try telling her how u feel about her and that she is special to u.. gifts wouldnt hurt either.. make sure u let her know how important she is to u.

 

some guys talk excessively about their ex's just to make their new gf's jealous.. if that's u, then well.. u'll never hear the end of it even if ur relationship works out. get ur friends to stop talking about ur history because girls are really sensitive about that kind of thing.

  • Author
Posted
You're 21. A puppy. Time you learned this.

 

She says: We need to talk

She means: I need to complain

 

She says: Are you listening to me?

She means: [Too late, you're doomed.]

 

She says: Sure... go ahead

She means: I don't want you to

 

She says: I'm not upset

She means: Of course I'm upset you moron

 

She says: You're ... so manly

She means: You need a shave and sweat a lot

 

She says: Am I fat?

She means: Tell me I'm beautiful.

 

She says: You have to learn to communicate.

She means: Just agree with me.

 

She says: Yes

She means: No

 

She says: No

She means: No

 

She says: Maybe

She means: No

 

Sure. Now tell, what does this have to do with my post?

  • Author
Posted
she isn't behaving like a 'spoiled brat'.. she's probably insecure about the fact that she keeps hearing about ur previous experiences with women, and she doesn't want to just be another random girl that u date and ditch afterwards. if it's not too late, then try telling her how u feel about her and that she is special to u.. gifts wouldnt hurt either.. make sure u let her know how important she is to u.

 

some guys talk excessively about their ex's just to make their new gf's jealous.. if that's u, then well.. u'll never hear the end of it even if ur relationship works out. get ur friends to stop talking about ur history because girls are really sensitive about that kind of thing.

 

In fact, whenever the subject came, I always tried to change it or tell my friends to shut up because it was pretty obvious that she didn't like to hear about it

Posted

What happened is she got your goat. If you've been clear to her that you really like her - you've had "the talk", and she's distancing herself from you - then you need to do the same.

 

Why don't you back off and see where things stand. I know, it's not easy. It takes the courage of knowing that things may end. And they may. But being too available isn't attractive. I, too, have learned this lesson recently...

 

Just take a deep breath and take a step back. If she really likes you she'll come rolling back in due time.

 

And if not, as I like to tell my friends, "Someone lovely will be along presently..".

Posted
Sure. Now tell, what does this have to do with my post?

 

That women are complex. Sometimes what they say and mean are two different things. And then what they do simply compounds that confusion.

 

Forget her. Don't be needy or clingy.. her interest level is obviously zero.

Posted

She was interested, she was starting to get a crush on you, your friends made her rethink it ... she is disengaging, 18 and too much of a coward to talk to you.

 

Why don't you talk to her face to face and alone ?

Posted

 

Seriously, usually it's me that gives ladies a cold shower and now that I'm going "gaga" for this girl, she's behaving like a spoiled brat? What the *bleep* happened that I totally missed?

Thanks for the replys

 

The fact that if an 18 year-old gorgeous girl sleeps with you so readily it means she gets it from guys on a regular basis. You are just one in a long queue. Enjoy

  • Like 2
  • Author
Posted
The fact that if an 18 year-old gorgeous girl sleeps with you so readily it means she gets it from guys on a regular basis. You are just one in a long queue. Enjoy

 

No disrespect, but from what I know of her and from what I hear from her friends, that's not actually true. In fact, in that same night, she had plans with friends but later cancelled them just for me.

Posted

Moe, you can do better than this.

Posted

She's probably feeling insecure and jealous which is normal for her age. You can either spend a lot of your time constantly reassuring her (which may get annoying after awhile) and not talking about your exes or just let her go.

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