TaraMaiden Posted August 21, 2012 Posted August 21, 2012 My neighbour's husband was more desperate than she was to have a family....
xxoo Posted August 21, 2012 Posted August 21, 2012 They delegate the crappy stuff (literally) to the mom and save their chosen parenting hours for 'fun-time-dad' activities that the dad enjoys... That is how they are 'having it all'... Usually... That only works in the tiny years, and kids see through it by school age. To bond and build a relationship, it takes more than being a fun parent. If having children is very important to the OP, I'm asking her to consider what kind of parent she wants to be, and how that priority will affect her current personal priorities. It really has little to do with what men can and can not do. 1
Blastoplast Posted August 21, 2012 Posted August 21, 2012 Honestly, I'm sick of women right now. I mean I love them, and want to find the girl right for me some day -- but 4 months in a break-up, after a 7 year relationship really puts things in perspective for me. I did EVERYTHING for my EX: cared for her when she was ill for a month, gave her emotional and financial support, took her everywhere in the country, let her live her life, never argued, loved her like she deserved to be loved... and in the end what do I get? Emotional stress, heartbreak and she owes me thousands upon thousands of dollars -- all because she's not sure what she wants right now. At this point in my life, being single for eternity doesn't sound bad. At least I don't have to deal with the wishy-washiness that is the woman's psyche. This is me, this is who I am.
thatone Posted August 21, 2012 Posted August 21, 2012 (edited) Yea, but the men aren't going to be made to feel like evil, child neglecting demons if they wish to do both... (witness some of the posts on this thread). not until the wife sends the last kid off to kindergarten and starts f*cking the bartender her and the other wives flirt with on 'girls nights'. then she'll need to rewrite some history to make herself feel better so she'll throw the 'neglect' bit on him then to project blame. Far from it... He is some kind of noble provider blah blah... but really all he's got is live in help... Gotta love it when they throw the mistress into the mix too once he's got 'mommy' at home and dependent on his paycheck. men don't typically drag their girlfriends/fiancees kicking and screaming into not working and churning out babies. women place a lot more importance on their white dress and baby than men do in general, so it's not like those women were duped into that arrangement, there's no shortage of them that select their husband based on the ability to pay for it all, above any other trait. i mean, it's all fine and good that you never wanted kids/marriage. i never did either, and i get along nicely. but those people that do are not victims, they chose to live in the system their parents raised them in. Edited August 21, 2012 by thatone
Imported Posted August 21, 2012 Posted August 21, 2012 24hs ... you can't have it all. There are Stay At Home Dads. Most successful career women are not looking g for a stay at home dad. They are looking for a man with an even more successful career than theirs....to some degree.
Eternal Sunshine Posted August 22, 2012 Posted August 22, 2012 Eh I am not desparate to have kids at all. My ex was way more into having kids than I ever was. Most men that I go on dates nowdays with ask me how soon do I want them.
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