onlyhope Posted July 15, 2004 Posted July 15, 2004 Hello list.. this goes out to the ladies or the fellows anyone who can help would be great. Ok my name is shawn and I'm 23. my girlfriend whom i've been dating for 9 months is 18. she recently broke up with me out of the blue and when i called her to talk about it she says that during our relationship we always argued over little things at least once every week, and so for the last month before breaking up she had been lying to herself about how she really felt towards us. Now we've been apart since June 27 and i still can't get over her. We've talked a few times only because i've called her to talk to her about us. To make a long story short she is not willing to give us a second chance because of the past experience with other guys. One thing though is that when we talk she cries and tell me it hurts to hear my voice, reccommended that if this is going to be it for us that i would like to see her one more time but she insist that it would not be a good idea because right now a part of her wants to come back to me but there is another part of her that would like to stay away. What should i do? I've been reading about the silent treatment thingy for months but we've been away for almost a month now. Not to mention last friday early in the morning i went to school to try and talk to a counsler about school stuff she appeared there too, it was probably about 7 am. i noticed her but was afraid to talk to her cause i don't know if she wanted to talk or not but when she walked by i belive she purposely shook her keys so that i would hear. We never got to talk until the doors to the office opened and then both of us got up and i smiled and waved at her and she did the same back. Anyways as of right now she posted on her website that last night she had a dream about her "friend" (which she considers me now) and that she wish i would not call her or wait for her and that i should move on with my life. What should i do? The thing is this.. when she says all this why is it that she still keeps my name on her webpage? even keeping all the enteries i've made in the past? do you think there is another chance? should i keep fighting the good fight to win her back or should i let her breathe? I know she loves me...... like i've said before when we last talked she told me even when we were dating that i was her world ( this was because she recently moved her last year and had nobody to help her except for me) also i asked her if she loves me and she replies yes. Also on her webpage she seems to be stating that her status is "single" and to me it seems like she is looking for some one to come and sweep her off her feet. am i thinking too much?
StartingAgain Posted July 15, 2004 Posted July 15, 2004 The "dream" is a fiction she put up there because she knows you look at her website. Friend, she's told you she is finished and my must respect that. Don't read anything into the fact that she cries and says it hurts when she talks to you. She probably does. Just because she decided to end the relationship doesn't mean she didn't care for you and doesn't hurt as badly as you do. But don't think for a minute that this will necessarily mean that she will change her mind. Women so rarely do when they call it quits. She's asked you not to call her so you don't. It's time for you to work on yourself, mourn the loss of the relationship and move on with your life. The NC advice isn't just for giving her space and time so that she can start to miss you and second guess her decision. It is also to give you the emotional distance you need to move on. This is going to hurt and there's no way for you to skirt it. You just have to get through it. The sooner you start the better off you'll be.
BAJI Posted July 15, 2004 Posted July 15, 2004 Sounds similiar to mine, my girl broke up with me on 25th July, we are friends now, she says she don't want to be with me now but maybe later, I love her and want her back, just try to get throught it as soon as possible man. Keep yourself occupied, find someone else and go on dates to get your mind off of it. Maybe she will come back and maybe not, all you can do is try to make you happy.
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