or not? Am I wrong?

[josephangel00]

　

 

Ok Well I just recently become involved in a new relationship with a new girlfriend. I got to know this for some months on & off. I finally asked her to be my gf (lets say named Cristy) last friday and she accepted and was very happy. I am very happy to have her in my life as well. 2 days after she accepted her bestfriend had passed away. That is already tough enough pill for her to swallow. Then just yesterday she introduced me to her friend (named John) s fiance (Shelly - who happens to be a girl i only hung out with a few times about a couple years ago). Yes I did kiss Shelly once (never be sexual with her and never had a relationship with her. When this happened I did not know nothing about her being off and on (with my current gf's friend John). When this did happen i was in the process of breaking up with another ex gf. I also had no idea this girl (Shelly) and I would ever again cross paths. Shelly did tell my current gf about us a couple of years ago. I admitted to my gf everything Shelly said was true. Shelly said to my gf "i just want you to keep your eyes open" , yet Shelly said "It was a couple years ago and people can change", Shelly claimed i was "obssesive" and my gf told her "He's NOT obsessive just very attentive" . I guess this is my gf defending me here?

 

Anyways after talking to my gf she admitted to me before John & Shelly got back together that her and John had a fling and John had flings with other women and than my gf told me all her bad things from before she met me.

 

I wasn't trying to hide anything from my gf, i felt with her bestfriend passing away the time just wasn't right. Shelly seemed to not be considerate of my gf current state of mind and went ahead and told her.

 

My gf says "she can't judge me as she too has had her bad flings and also did things with John" . She also told me "Shelly left John a couple of times and cheated on him and wanted to be a lesbian" . Thus I'm assuming that my gf is giving me a benefit of a doubt and says "it would be VERY hypocritcal for me to judge you on this" .

 

After all this does this mean my gf does want us to work this out and such? Will she think of me different? If she does is it fair?

 

I told her "I don't care who you dated in the past, whatever you did with John before her and Shelly gotback together, it doesn't matter! I only care about how you are acting with me! "

 

So in the end I have no hard feelings towards John, Shelly, and I could care less what any of them did in the past. I onlyt care how my gf and i do now.

 

I am trying to be mature about this and not dramatic. Any second thoughts anyone?

 

Do you believe my gf really wants to stay with me and work this out? we gotten to know each other for months before i finally asked her out. she told me intimately before many times " I don't want to loose you please!"

 

Please be blunt !

[lil hoodlum]

I don't understand what is the issue. We all have done things in our past that we may not be proud of. These things can be a blessing though becuase we usually learn a few things about life or about ourselves.

 

Why is something that happened several years ago even relavent with your current girlfriend? The two of you didn't even know each other.

[pteromom]

Sounds to me like you guys both confessed your prior history with a couple you know, and that's it. No biggie. I don't see anything here that would change the course of your relationship.