LK30 Posted August 16, 2012 Posted August 16, 2012 Hi all, I've signed up to LoveShack for life! Been single over 2 years now. Younger brother getting married in three weeks and he's giving me the gently nudge to move out as I live with him and his fiancee. It is time to move on but really been reflecting on life at the moment. A friend texted me last week about going for a drink in town but my self esteem feels so low I felt like I didn't want to go out. I know it's not the be all and end of all being in a relationship but I feel like an absolute ghost as every girl I meet seems to look through me. I do think I'm quite ugly to be honest although I have dated in the past. This is the longest I've gone without a date or girlfriend. I admit I have a good look at the ladies out and about as it's summer so the pretty ones are easier to see but I never see any girls looking back. I'm just going through a phase but I just feel like I have absolutely nothing attractive about me. I work in Social Work and a parent came to a meeting that I also attended recently. He used to hit his ex gf about and is facing prison, yet he strolls in with a really stunning new girlfriend!! I just give up!!
eMGunslinger Posted August 17, 2012 Posted August 17, 2012 Well majority of women date jerks. But your self esteem helps nothing, women can pick up on that. If you sit there slumped over staring into a bottle then they wont want to talk to you anyway. I can do this even alone at a bar (No I'm not a player by any means or a jerk to women). Go out with your friend, keep a smile on your face walk around like you own the place and always seem busy. Put yourself in the center of anywhere you go don't be a back room/corner fly. Look around hold a good posture, see someone look at you for 3 seconds. Thats your cue, go up strike conversation. You will fail a good bit, like riding a bike. Get up put a bandage on and try again!! Make them laugh be up beat women like men who are positive and in good spirits.
Author LK30 Posted August 17, 2012 Author Posted August 17, 2012 Thanks guys. Funnily enough I met a girl at a meeting the other day who works in a different team and she was quite attractive. We barely had chance to speak and it was a serious meeting but wish I had had the guts to ask her for a drink. Working in a professional environment it's not appropriate to do that. I was a bit naughty and found her on Facebook and there aren't any pics of blokes so perhaps she's single. Shame, and surprise surprise she looked through me as well!
Author LK30 Posted August 19, 2012 Author Posted August 19, 2012 Well by coincidence I've found she has a profile on a dating site and it's revealed she's 3 years younger than me and signed into the site only a couple of days ago, so I took the not so brave step and 'winked' at her! I've got a meeting with her in a few weeks so that could be awkward if she doesn't respond!! I'll let you know when she fails to respond!!!!!!!
Author LK30 Posted August 22, 2012 Author Posted August 22, 2012 Well she replied to my work e-mail today about a work related issue and when I replied (with a slightly humorous comment about something to do with the issue in question) she replied with a ha ha and a sentence relating to what I said. I then replied again with another humorous comment to try to engage her in a conversation but she never replied! :-(
VodkaShots Posted August 22, 2012 Posted August 22, 2012 No offence, but since you mentioned in the OP you don't think you're attractive yourself (I don't know if you are or aren't), is it possible you're only paying attention to attractive women? Forget any crap you've read about women only caring about sense of humour / personality, most women have physical appearance standards and some place value in financial security. There's nothing wrong with having standards, but if you don't meet those standards yourself, you're setting yourself up to fail (not to mention, you can come across as being a hypocrite to some). It's common sense really, most couples you see are roughly of the same level of attractiveness, same social class and of course compatibility, there's always exceptions, but they're not the rule. The answer is to either be more flexible with your standards, or take steps to improve yourself, MrDude made some suggestions already, but working on your confidence would be a good start too.
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