jordjones Posted August 16, 2012 Posted August 16, 2012 At the end of the first date, after a genuine good night of casual drinking and some physical escalation (touching, hand holding, etc.) I go in for the kiss. We were in the car and as my mouth approached hers, she moved towards me slowly (at least 25% of the way) and when our lips were centimeters apart, she put her hand against my face (as if to stop), but held her mouth there for at least three seconds, probably more like five. I wasn't sure what to do, and after that time passed, she kissed me on the cheek. At the time (two days ago), I felt rejected, and said something to the effect of, "I've never had that happen to me like that before..." She just kind of smiled - didn't have an awkward expression at all - and I said good night. The next morning at 8 am I receive the following text: "I got that feeling I've not been really nice to you yesterday, starting with letting you wait that long (she was about 15 minutes late). Hope you're having a nicer day and hope to see you soon." I responded hours later: No worries. Should I ask her out again? Some background: I met this girl outside of a bar while visiting the city in February. She is a super cute European 21 year old (I'm 27). We just exchanged numbers then, and I asked her out on Valentine's Day (she said she couldn't go), and I would text her whenever I visited, and our groups of friends met up a few times on Saturday nights, but it was usually very quick (no more than an hour). I had seen her in person for a total of maybe two hours before the date. I also just moved to the city. So I'm now in the area (which is a reason why I think she accepted the date).
BS76 Posted August 16, 2012 Posted August 16, 2012 First things first, the best time to go for the kiss isn't at the end of the date...it's about the mid-point. If you were doing everything right, namely escalating the physical contact, then your odds are way up there it'll go well. That awkward kiss at the end of the night is awkward to say the least, especially if you weren't physically escalating. Remember, 2 steps forward, 1 step back. Vin Dicarlo has a good FREE escalation guide on this. Second, never ever appear phased or affected by a rejection. Just pretend nothing happened and give it another shot 5 minutes later. It's possible what you interpreted as a "no" was really just a "not yet". If she's really at "no" she'll make her intentions known. This is what leads me to believe this was more of a siht/fitness test than anything else. Whether it was by design or an automatic habit of hers doesn't matter. 1
henderson14 Posted August 16, 2012 Posted August 16, 2012 Of course you should. Don't be a baby. Usually the first kiss is on the second date and she did text you and showed interest. She texted "I hope to see you soon." What else do you need? A billboard saying she's into you? Also, do you like her? Shouldn't that be the main determining factor? What if you guys end up getting married and don't because you couldn't take not getting a kiss yet. 1
veggirl Posted August 16, 2012 Posted August 16, 2012 "no worries" was your response to that text?! She wanted you to ask her out again! So yes, call her right now and do so! I bet she felt like a total idiot after getting that response from you. I'd call her ASAP if you are interested in a 2nd date.
Author jordjones Posted August 16, 2012 Author Posted August 16, 2012 To answer a previous question. I do like her. She has a funny, spunky personality that compliments mine well. We talk about all sorts of stuff, and the convos have never been dead. Plus, she may be the hottest chick I've ever gone out with. My hesitance is because I've had a policy of "nexting" girls for this type of crap. Not just the kiss fail, but also showing up late and all of that. I have been a chump in the past and don't want to be perceived as such.
kaylan Posted August 16, 2012 Posted August 16, 2012 Id pass unless she says she wants to see you again. Let her pursue you.
Author jordjones Posted August 17, 2012 Author Posted August 17, 2012 Just called her. Brief convo. Got the second date set for Saturday.
Ninjainpajamas Posted August 17, 2012 Posted August 17, 2012 Just called her. Brief convo. Got the second date set for Saturday. You can either beat her at her own game or win her over with yours. Which one do you think you can pull off? She's 21 and you're 27...it couldn't be that hard really, fish in a barrel. 1
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