edwards99 Posted August 15, 2012 Posted August 15, 2012 my ex one day says she wants to keep trying..but needs time to heal..lose resentment etc,..then wants to try again..then wants to back away..then try again..then go for coffee..then back away..and over n over.. i have tried to talk to her about it but it doesnt seem to phase her... what is some advice..what should i be saying to her..because i dont know..i feel she is just stringing me along.,.and then she seems sincere..
Matt145 Posted August 15, 2012 Posted August 15, 2012 The same thing happend to me mate its painful. Eventually in the end she said she didnt want to get back together and it was over for good which crushed me even more than breaking up with me. Now she wants to be FWB and is using sex to lure me into her to be her friend from a guys prospective is ****ing hard to say no too. All i can say is just ask her what she really wants, just tell her your sick of the games she is playing. If she says she doesnt know what she wants just go NC and let her contact you and make sure you tell her that you dont want her to contact you until she is 100% sure what she wants. This isnt a good sign though so dont get your hopes up like i did but every girl is different i guess! Goodluck bro
AlexfromBoston Posted August 15, 2012 Posted August 15, 2012 Edward, contrary to what others may advise on this forum, I say you should play her little game and enjoy the FWB scenario. While enjoying this FWB scenario, get out with friends and attempt to meet new women. You essentially have been granted a "hall pass", allowing you to do what you wish with other women...no strings attached. And I know what you're thinking, "well, I don't want her having sex with another guy"...well, unfortunately, she may be doing that anyways. You might as well enjoy yourself while she's enjoying herself. In lieu of breaking it off, you can "wow" her sexually by asking what she likes and how you should do it. Explain that you feel more comfortable discussing this stuff in this new FWB scenario. Trust me, if you amp it up sexually, she's going to remember it when you become cold and distant. And that's exactly what your are going to have to do, f--k her and then become the prototypical a-hole. No more cuddling, talking, etc. Explain to her that you only had those benefits when we were in a relationship. And at the same time, make sure you let her know that you intend on seeing other women and having fun. It's very tough for a women to engage in a FWB scenario with an ex. There are too many emotions in play and women become too sensitive when you respond to the sexual tryst like the typical frat boy jerk. And bro, word to the wise, get very, very good at performing oral sex....because THAT's the quickest way to a girl's heart...not diamonds or chocolate. 1
Author edwards99 Posted August 15, 2012 Author Posted August 15, 2012 maybe i wasnt clear..she moved out month n a half a go..no sex..lol..no fwb..lol...i wish but it would kill me emotionally i think..
AlexfromBoston Posted August 15, 2012 Posted August 15, 2012 Edward I posted that in response to Matt...sorry. Unfortunately, your ex is taking you for a ride. She's playing you. You are going to need to go NC for a brief period and then transition to LC. During your limited chats, you need to seem cold and disinterested in her. Don't lose your bearing and spout, "I miss you" or "I love you so much". Also, make sure you're the one to terminate each conversation. A little tip....when returing her calls, try to do so in a loud, public environment(preferably a bar or club). Enagage in conversation with a friend or bystander while simutaneously speaking to her. Make it sound like you're having a blast and abrubtly tell her that you need to go and will try to call her later on in the evening. Make sure you return her call later the following day. She will be thinking, "OMG, what happened last night?". Essentially, if she loves you, this will drive her nuts and push the ball in your court.
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