The brutally honest low-down on the Porn Issue:what no one had the guts to say

[capitald]

Internet porn, the big enemy. Yeah while EVERYONE has looked at it at least once and most people probably look at it a great deal, even those that preach against it. Thats the hypocrisy. I personally think it is stupid. My ex ex girlfriend didn't believe that there should be porn and she said people only look at it because it is there. She probably had a point but boy was she a terrible tight ass. Come to think of it porn may have existed because of her.

 

In any case I am beginning to think it is not too good myself. In fact, it is poison, it poisons the user a great deal even while it cures him/her a little bit. Believe me or not. I don't think however I will have alot of porn supporters here seeing as many of the women posters see it as the thing that wrecked their marriage. That is something I don't buy into, if you don't look good anymore because your too lazy to maintain yourself, don't blame porn for being appealing. That said I by no means think porn is doing a service to society, that is, I mean I don't think its doing good. On the other hand however, it may be doing the ultimate good, keeping us from all killing each other because be honest, how practical does sex become once we get "real" lives filled to the brim with heavy responsibilites.

 

I believe its sometimes hard to get aroused without some form of stimulation. Whats the difference whether we look at a picture on the net or fantasize about some girl we know in our head. I think the former is in a sense more respectful, at least we don't know that person and they are just an image to us. And girls fantasize the same way as guys and yes some even look at Internet porn as well.

Many people just have the 20/20, 60 Minutes mindset. They are looking for that enemy, someone to blame, someplace besides their spouse to fix the blame. Face it, porn didn't ruin your marriage, you did. Ask for what you need the next time around.

 

Porn may be a ugly and ultimately crappy thing. At the same time, it may be a necessary evil, a safety valve for our "sterile" society. That said, don't let it be an excuse for human weakness.

[Ana]

I studied feminism in uni. I've written research papers on pornography; I've appealed to the left-wing lesbian professors who read my papers by condemning it as degrading to women and as advancing the madonna/whore dichotomy that is already experiencing a resurgance under Bush.

 

But I love porn. I'm not addicted to it, but I visit porn sites for inspiration for my masturbation fantasies, and watch x-rated dvds with my boyfriend. I don't take it seriously - I just think it is a great way to explore your sexuality and unleash hidden desires. It can be hilarious and it can also be extremely erotic.

 

I'm not as gorgeous as many of the porn stars out there but I don't think my boyfriend expects or wants me to be! Getting insecure over some image on the screen or in a magazine says more about you than the "evil industry" behind it. And while that industry may not be the most politically correct, it is responsible for the employment of millions world-wide.

 

Most of the complaints on this board seem to stem from a jealous wife/gf finding out her husband/bf has been looking at porn. If I were you, the only reason I would be angry is that he didn't want to share the experience with me. Maybe if you opened up and didn't take it so personally, you can enjoy a healthier and more divergent sex life together.

[havNfun]

Ana, I like your points (accept for the Bush stab)

 

I feel that the women that are upset about their husbands looking at porn,

then perhaps THOSE women should be looking in the mirror, asking themselves

if they have kept themselves attractive.

[moimeme]

I feel that the women that are upset about their husbands looking at porn,

then perhaps THOSE women should be looking in the mirror, asking themselves

if they have kept themselves attractive.

 

Oh for heaven's sakes! The whole reason that the women are worried about the porn is that they *feel* unattractive, no matter how attractive they might be. Their self-esteem is in the toilet even when there is no reason to be - so remarks like that are not even slightly helpful. And what about the men? Do they not have a responsibility to keep themselves 'attractive'?

 

Here I and others have been saying for months that men don't turn to porn because they find their wives unattractive - and men in droves agree - and in one fell swoop you undo all we've been trying to do.

 

Maybe some men are truly that shallow. They deserve partners who are equally so and who will ignore them sexually the minute they develop their beer guts.

[Samson]

In fact, it is poison, it poisons the user a great deal even while it cures him/her a little bit.

 

Interesting analogy: Instead of "Chicken soup for the Soul," sort of "Chemotherapy for the Soul?"

 

Well, now I've done it: Broken my boycott never to post to a porn/anti porn thread!

 

The senseless continues.......................

[caz_cheer_jenn]

OK let me get it right out there....I LOVE PORN. I don't think it is degrading to women unless you are uncomfortable with your body image. In that case, all you will see when you watch porn is a picture of what you are not. That's your problem, and you have to deal with that.

 

In my case, I watch porn because I love sex and I love to watch others loving it too! I am also very into the sounds that people make when they are having sex...a huge turn-on. I very rarely get off while watching porn, but I sometimes learn new tricks to use with others (it's actually how I learned to give oral!)

 

That being said, I think porn is a healthy way to express your sexuality and it is a lame excuse for a failed relationship. If you think you lost your man over porn, you are deluding yourself. I have never known any guy to say "Hey, you don't do it like the pornstars, so I'm leaving you for my television/computer where I can see REAL women do it the way I like it!" Most likely, your REACTION to the porn is what drove them away, not the fact that they like to watch it. Everyone likes to have their fantasies, and if being with a pornstar is one of his, what's the harm in it? It's not like they're ever going to actually MEET one and sleep with them.

 

IT'S HEALTHY AND HARMLESS.....get off your soapbox already!

[Pained]

Oh Good God. I'm with Moimeme on this one.

 

Capitald, the only thing you left out of your little speech was that women should turn even more to fashion magazines to see what ideal women look like, and perhaps lose some weight, or some ridiculous notion.

 

The truth of the matter is that men don't usually look at porn because there's something wrong with the way their woman looks. It has nothing to do with the woman being lazy or unattractive, in most cases.

 

I'm not offended by porn, or by people looking at it, because frankly, so do I. What DOES offend me is the poisoning we're doing to women's minds. I'll tell you what - post a picture of yourself so that I can tell you if you look good enough to tell women what they should do to make themselves look better so that their men don't look at porn.

 

Tangent: gotta love how fat/unkempt/hairy/bald men will criticize their woman's physical features. Buddy, look in the mirror. You aren't a prize yourself.

[havNfun]

Are you kiddng me??? Post: 6 | Quote:

 

OK let me get it right out there....I LOVE PORN. I don't think it is degrading to women unless you are uncomfortable with your body image. In that case, all you will see when you watch porn is a picture of what you are not. That's your problem, and you have to deal with that.

 

In my case, I watch porn because I love sex and I love to watch others loving it too! I am also very into the sounds that people make when they are having sex...a huge turn-on. I very rarely get off while watching porn, but I sometimes learn new tricks to use with others (it's actually how I learned to give oral!)

 

That being said, I think porn is a healthy way to express your sexuality and it is a lame excuse for a failed relationship. If you think you lost your man over porn, you are deluding yourself. I have never known any guy to say "Hey, you don't do it like the pornstars, so I'm leaving you for my television/computer where I can see REAL women do it the way I like it!" Most likely, your REACTION to the porn is what drove them away, not the fact that they like to watch it. Everyone likes to have their fantasies, and if being with a pornstar is one of his, what's the harm in it? It's not like they're ever going to actually MEET one and sleep with them.

 

IT'S HEALTHY AND HARMLESS.....get off your soapbox already!

 

I absolutely agree! thank you for your truthfull post there jenn.

 

Lets face it there are two approaches to "helping" or "responding" to people with a problem.

1. one is to tell them what you think they need to hear in order to feel better

2. the other is telling them reality so that perhaps they will see it and GET better.

 

Is it comfortable to here that your man watches as much porn because there are other problems in the relationship etc? maybe -

 

My main thought about it is similar to Jenns. I don't think the big issue is "how can men turn to porn and blame it on the wife etc."... To me its a question of "why would a woman be so threatened by it instead of viewing it as entertainment and/or additional stimulation and fun to a couples sexual life. BTW, if you know men at all, you know that the best way to get him to stop obsesively watching porn is to (as the wife) start asking for it, requesting and almost insisting on it. Once you show your husband that it is not such a naughty and independant thing, but a constant chore, perhaps he'll stop.

 

at anyrate, porn is hot.

[lustmonkey]

I was going to write a long article to this taking up sides and bashing some but I will make it short and sweet.

 

Porn is good. We are not aloud to have wh0re houses anymore(ancient greeks) the greeks understood that men have urges that must be taken care of. They now have to go to masterbating instead of real women. Think about our ancient greek culture.

[dyermaker]

There are whorehouses in Nevada.

[lustmonkey]

ok, legal wh0rehouses. most men are to afraid to break the law

[Caroli]

Originally posted by moimeme

Oh for heaven's sakes! The whole reason that the women are worried about the porn is that they *feel* unattractive, no matter how attractive they might be.

 

Thank you for telling us what is the reason. It's so good that a person can have all the answers

[dyermaker]

Originally posted by lustmonkey

ok, legal wh0rehouses. most men are to afraid to break the law

Prostitution is legal in Nevada.

 

Men (or women) can go to whorehouses in Nevada, and pay for sex, without fear of arrest.

[shortbus74]

women get upset with porn because the women have had mass plastic enhancement.............plus they have hair and makeup people.............

 

hey..........I kinda like me.........I am stuck with me because I have lived in my skin for 30 years now...........I am not a "porn star looking girl" but I feel pretty because my future hubby tells me everyday.....

 

What is funny about porn is men watch it to get off and women watch it to point out all the bad things that the female are doing in porn......... (omg!!! I would never wear those shoes with that dress............omg! if I paid for that boob job I would ask for a refund!................omg! her hair is just right out of the trailer park!)

 

Ladies want to ruin the porn for hubby..........point out flaws........... and then make your own...............hubby tells me he likes ours more than watching mainstream porn...............

[shortbus74]

dyer........and the Nevada places are $$$$$$$$$$

 

 

saw a menu for the bunny ranch once...........wow.............$$$ women also have to have a male escort in Nevada for most of the clubs..............

[caz_cheer_jenn]

What is funny about porn is men watch it to get off and women watch it to point out all the bad things that the female are doing in porn......... (omg!!! I would never wear those shoes with that dress............omg! if I paid for that boob job I would ask for a refund!................omg! her hair is just right out of the trailer park!)

 

Shortbus, I LOVE that! So true! And so much fun!

[havNfun]

What is funny about porn is men watch it to get off and women watch it to point out all the bad things that the female are doing in porn......... (omg!!! I would never wear those shoes with that dress............omg! if I paid for that boob job I would ask for a refund!................omg! her hair is just right out of the trailer park!)

 

wanted to point out to you that all porn is not the same.

in fact there are MANY different types ranging from high heels and boob jobs to amature couples etc.

[caz_cheer_jenn]

Amateur porn is sooo much better! Real people doing real things, without all of the makeup, teased hair, and crazy outfits...but it's still a blast to make fun of the overdone porn too.

[Mr Spock]

I have seen pornography that is VERY degrading to women. It's produced by Max something or other and he stars in every one. I personally don't find it erotic at all. But I do find other pornography that isn't like that stuff to be.

[havNfun]

yes some forms of porn just aren't enjoyable.

 

I am with jenn

 

 

Amateur porn is sooo much better

 

amature is better - the more natural and real life

the hotter it is.

 

what kind of porn is it you like spock?