misterhappyface Posted August 14, 2012 Posted August 14, 2012 Hi, I started seeing this girl a couple of years younger than me. We've been meeting for just about over a month when she comes over to my house late at night crying. She says that many of the things we'd so far done reminded her of the memories she had with her ex, that she broke up with a 3-4 months before "me". We agreed to take it a bit more easy. Now we had already had sex after just 3 dates even though she told me she wanted to move slowly. She was very happy and playful when we met and reminded me often of how happy she was that she'd found me and that she actually started to like me quite a bit. After that "cry night" we met a few times and the mood was indeed tense and a bit awkward. I can agree that I acted in the wrong way when we did so (maybe a bit sad, irritated, etc). Well after a couple of days we texted and it ended with her saying that she wasn't really ready for another relationship yet. Some days went by and we still texted sometimes. I said that I was cool with the decision she had made and that we shouldn't throw away our friendship. It didn't really work out that well so since a few days back I have implemented the no contact-rule. She came by my house (we live close) when I was outside practising soccer today and she acted a bit nervous yet bitter when around. Though she didn't have to walk to me she did. Sometimes during our "dates" when her ex was brought up she honestly told me that her feelings for him were over, though I could tell she was still a bit moved by the topic. What will I do? Should I keep the "no contact" or should I maybe call her/text her and see if she's okay? She has been a bit disturbed and sad because of other family related things as well. I'd be soo incredibly happy to get some answers Peace
BrokenAnna Posted August 14, 2012 Posted August 14, 2012 Sounds like a rebound relationship, however there is not much you can do since the issue lays with her. She needs to sort herself out first before she can move on in a healthy manner and love you wholeheartedly instead of using and abusing you to get over the ex. I always think in these cases it best to keep a bit of distance, just enough so you don't apply too much pressure on her which might send her running for the hills. Be sincere and support her, but do not pressure her into a relationship. Also if you feel like being used then it is best to call it quits and find someone else.
Car10e Posted August 15, 2012 Posted August 15, 2012 Its really not fair to yourself to be with a girl while she is still thinking of her ex. I wouldn't get too close to her, because what if you do get close and she ends up running back to her ex? That will leave you devastated.
Author misterhappyface Posted August 15, 2012 Author Posted August 15, 2012 Thanks for such quick replys! She asked today if we could wipe the slate clean and I agreed on it. She was telling me a couple of times that she felt as if I didn't want to talk to her and I can say that I kept a little distance. Anyway, we ended up taking a short walk this evening and it felt okay. I implemented the good traits the best I could. So now that I know she still cares or at least thinks something about me I'll keep the NC till she makes that move. Felt a lot better to actually know that things between us are cool now anyway.
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