KatZee Posted December 3, 2012 Posted December 3, 2012 Update: I was doing fine until the past week. Then I made a grave mistake and checked her page. Does "second or third worst feeling of all-time" describe this correctly? Not again. No. I just deactivated my Facebook. The instant pain I felt isn't worth it. I have zero need for that site right now. I'll return one day to FB, but I just ruined every last bit of my healing. December, Christmas time... is there a worse time to screw up? I don't think so. I need all the support I can get... A wise man once said, "The key to living a happy life, is not asking the questions you don't want to know the answers to." SO--- if you don't want to know if your ex was dating someone else or happy, don't "ask those questions" by looking. Your ex should be blocked, this way you CAN'T snoop on them if you're so tempted. When my relationship ended, my ex was blocked and deleted the SAME DAY. Pictures were taken down, I went through my whole wall and deleted all of his comments, etc. I untagged myself from any pictures he had up of me. I wanted NOTHING on my page linked back to him. I haven't even been curious to see what he's doing, so I guess it's not that difficult for me. I'm sure if I loved him or cared I'd be slightly tempted but I'd know anything I saw would hurt me so I wouldn't bother. 1
Drseussgrrl Posted December 3, 2012 Posted December 3, 2012 Life is so much better without Facebook. 1
Hurt Irish guy Posted December 3, 2012 Posted December 3, 2012 block them simple as, you will just end up looking every 10 mins...... believe me it works. you would be surprised how quick they start to go from your head if you stop looking at them multiple times a day!!!!
ImperfectionisBeauty Posted December 3, 2012 Posted December 3, 2012 I still look every now and then and feel like crap, I just remember how ****ty I feel after and I stop. I also deleted him from FB (we are both private so I have no idea whats going on with him), and unfollowed him on Twitter. Occupying myself helps a lot.
Simon Phoenix Posted December 3, 2012 Posted December 3, 2012 After our break I was checking her Facebook pretty regularly. She doesn't really update that much, but I was looking at old photos of her, some of us together, yada yada yada, reminiscing and all of that. Then one day I saw her hugging some dude in a picture on my news feed and my heart just dropped. Turns out the dude was just the younger brother of one of her best friends and no one she was hooking up with, but that moment shook me up. I didn't block her for political reasons, but I did turn off her news feed and made a vow to not click on her page. And I haven't for over two months. Has served the same function as blocking her from my perspective without the "look at me" aspect of blocking. That works for now. If I ever get to the point where I have to click on her profile, then I'll block.
na49 Posted December 3, 2012 Posted December 3, 2012 My ex blocked me a week after she broke up with me. I was pretty angry and was sending her stuff like "are you going to apologize for cheating on me?" "I know what you did" etc. So from that side of it I don't blame her for blocking me. It is honestly for the better, if she didn't do it I would've had to eventually. After finding out she blocked me I made a new account to check up on her (stalker much?) I gave that up after about a week though and deleted the account. I realized that it was getting old seeing her dumb status updates about whatever, and if I saw a picture of her happy as can be with another guy I'd probably lose it. I realize that nothing I find out from checking her facebook can help me. She's loving life without me? She's loving the guy she cheated on me with more then she loved me? She's miserable and is hating life? I don't want to know about anything going in her life and want to keep it that way. I'm proud to say I haven't checked her facebook or twitter in over a month and I hope to keep it that way. I'm honestly afraid that I'll get the urge to check one day and actually go through with it and set myself back. I have to stay strong though.
cavalier99 Posted December 3, 2012 Posted December 3, 2012 (edited) I have the login to my EX's facebook. Thank God i haven't staked. Early after the BU I almost logged in to force her to change the password but was too scared. Now i have no urge 2 months into NC. I just imagine i would see happy pics of her and new guy holding a baby and that is enough to stop me. Edited December 3, 2012 by cavalier99
imstatic Posted December 4, 2012 Posted December 4, 2012 As a friend told me a few days ago: "you have to fight the thoughts that disturb you". Everytime I get the urge to look at her facebook, I decide to confront that thought. Up until now, nothing good has come out of looking at her pictures. They just make me feel miserable afterwards and give me a hard time focusing at work. Do you really want to lose your job or get into a car accident or whatever, just because our ex seems to be having fun? Stay strong, you can do this!
thembones Posted December 4, 2012 Posted December 4, 2012 It is what people do.. check on the FB to see what your ex is upto. I did the same thing for a month or so. It hurt more than it helped and was not worth it. So, I stopped looking but kept her as a friend. Fast forward to 3 months after break up.. I met up with her and she told me she looked at my FB a couple times a day and was shocked I did not know she went on vacation, Halloween costumes, or anything going on in her life. I was kinda pissed that she was looking so often but didnt want to be with me. A couple days later I removed her from my friends list and it has made me feel better.
Stimulant Posted January 16, 2013 Posted January 16, 2013 I keep looking at her Facebook and I feel like I can't stop! I'm terrified of never seeing her again and moving on without her.
Mantha03 Posted January 17, 2013 Posted January 17, 2013 How? You say? To save myself the pain. I made a fake account because my ex had his blocked and started chatting him up and he hit on the fake person I made up. Also found out he had been seeing two people I knew very well and was led to believe he hated them. It hurt so bad that I never ever looked at it again and to this day I don't have a Facebook. It's not worth the pain. Good luck its hard to stop but even easier after you do
SleeplessRomantic Posted January 17, 2013 Posted January 17, 2013 You will literally feel like a new human being after removing/separating yourself from your ex. Not instantly, but after a while, say a month or 2 (or 3), you will feel great. Just keep that in mind. Checking out your ex's Facebook will serve no purpose as far as benefits go.
flitzanu Posted January 17, 2013 Posted January 17, 2013 This is killing me. I need to STOP looking at my ex-girlfriend's Facebook, but I keep convincing myself not to out of this idiotic irrational fear of different things. How do I stop looking at her Facebook? How do I 'delete' everything about her from my life? How did you do it? Thoughts, tips and advice is much appreciated... you BLOCK them. problem solved. there is absolutely nothing that you're going to find out from stalking her fb that will help you in any possible way.
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