snug.bunny Posted August 13, 2012 Posted August 13, 2012 (1) To want someone who hasn't cheated in a past relationship? (2) To want someone who hasn't engaged in a threesome? (3) To want someone who hasn't engaged in sex with someone knowing he/she had a significant other?
ThaWholigan Posted August 13, 2012 Posted August 13, 2012 Is it reasonable to want happiness? sorry Of course it is, why wouldn't it be? 3
Imajerk17 Posted August 13, 2012 Posted August 13, 2012 (1) To want someone who hasn't cheated in a past relationship? (2) To want someone who hasn't engaged in a threesome? (3) To want someone who hasn't engaged in sex with someone knowing he/she had a significant other? Next thing you know, you're gonna start getting real uppity and say you want someone who doesn't have a felony record too. Some people are never satisfied! 6
MrCastle Posted August 13, 2012 Posted August 13, 2012 If you're finding it hard to find people who fit that criteria, you're looking at the wrong people. 3
fortyninethousand322 Posted August 13, 2012 Posted August 13, 2012 For some people it's reasonable. For others, it's not. So it depends.
Author snug.bunny Posted August 13, 2012 Author Posted August 13, 2012 Next thing you know, you're gonna start getting real uppity and say you want someone who doesn't have a felony record too. Some people are never satisfied! funny.
Badsingularity Posted August 13, 2012 Posted August 13, 2012 Absolutely not! What are you thinking?!!! joking I'd say it's pretty reasonable to want that.
Author snug.bunny Posted August 13, 2012 Author Posted August 13, 2012 Absolutely not! What are you thinking?!!! joking I'd say it's pretty reasonable to want that. I be illing. What other behaviors would others be opposed to/consider a deal breaker, that goes against his/her own ethics/morals?
Author snug.bunny Posted August 13, 2012 Author Posted August 13, 2012 Pretty unreasonable if you're attracted to someone like me Overpriced shirts? Yes.
threebyfate Posted August 13, 2012 Posted August 13, 2012 Pretty unreasonable if you're attracted to someone like meDon the affliction and you too will embrace the ways of ceiling cat?
jocy_20 Posted August 13, 2012 Posted August 13, 2012 It shouldn't matter if it's in the past and they are sure that they want to be with you.
verhrzn Posted August 13, 2012 Posted August 13, 2012 I get the not wanting cheaters, but what's so wrong with a threesome? I fully intend on trying one with my next boyfriend. Seem like an awful lot of fun, if done correctly.
Later82012 Posted August 13, 2012 Posted August 13, 2012 (1) To want someone who hasn't cheated in a past relationship? (2) To want someone who hasn't engaged in a threesome? (3) To want someone who hasn't engaged in sex with someone knowing he/she had a significant other? Yes, yes and yes. Very reasonable.
mortensorchid Posted August 13, 2012 Posted August 13, 2012 It's reasonalbe, yes, to ask those things. But I have a tip for you here : Don't ask others these questions. Just tonight, the last serious bf called me and told me that he now has a new gf and was about to update his Facebook status. I said "If that's what you're going to do, go right ahead." I think he was shocked I said this, but I said "Hey, we broke up. That's the facts, do what you like." He said he didn't want me to find out by reading the newsfeed. I said "Alright." Not "thanks" because I wasn't exactly thankful to hear this. But, that's the breaks. During the time I was with him, he told me some things about his past. And I only volunteered when asked about it. I said it would be foolish if not downright neive of me to assume that neither one has had a past, we've both had a past, but we are together in the here and now. And now it's over, and that's that.
Woggle Posted August 13, 2012 Posted August 13, 2012 Very reasonable though I have done the threesome thing. The cheating thing would be an absolute dealbreaker though. I find nothing wrong with threesomes as long as everybody knows the score and it is done honestly. 1
Emilia Posted August 13, 2012 Posted August 13, 2012 (1) To want someone who hasn't cheated in a past relationship? (2) To want someone who hasn't engaged in a threesome? (3) To want someone who hasn't engaged in sex with someone knowing he/she had a significant other? Very reasonable but on top of the usual compatibility list (wanting similar values, goals in life, etc) it narrows the pool considerably. I'm not worried about threesomes, points 1 and 3 matter to me too. An additional one would be: stable family background with strong values.
kaylan Posted August 13, 2012 Posted August 13, 2012 (1) To want someone who hasn't cheated in a past relationship? (2) To want someone who hasn't engaged in a threesome? (3) To want someone who hasn't engaged in sex with someone knowing he/she had a significant other? Id say those are reasonable requests and not super rare to find in a person. I have never cheated, and I have never hooked up with someone I knew had a bf...I refuse to be a part of any cheating as its against my honest and loyal nature. But regarding number 2, I have been a part of a couple threesomes in my life. Never full blown intercourse, but other things did occur. I would say you should budge a bit on number 2, as it has no bearing on someones views of honesty and loyalty.
Titanwolf Posted August 13, 2012 Posted August 13, 2012 Pretty much summarized the criteria, I and all the people I know have for finding a partner. It's certainly reasonable.
HeavenOrHell Posted August 13, 2012 Posted August 13, 2012 Not unreasonable at all no, however, I cheated in my early 20's (in my 40's now) and have never, and would never, do it again, so from my own experience I would not rule out someone who cheated a long time ago, and regretted it and learnt from it. (1) To want someone who hasn't cheated in a past relationship? (2) To want someone who hasn't engaged in a threesome? (3) To want someone who hasn't engaged in sex with someone knowing he/she had a significant other? 2
Taramere Posted August 13, 2012 Posted August 13, 2012 (edited) I think all three are reasonable...but threesomes are a common male fantasy. It might not be difficult to find a man who hasn't had one due to lack of opportunity, but it would probably be more difficult to find a man who has had the opportunity of a threesome and turned it down. That said, men who get those opportunities most likely do so because they hang around with a slightly freakier crowd than average. The cheating/accomplice to cheating thing...I don't know. I mean, I think it's reasonable to not want somebody who has been involved in those scenarios but I also think that many, many people have been involved in a cheating situation and will either lie about it or bend the truth. One of the things people will most commonly do, in order to justify cheating to themselves and to others, is to start viewing the relationship they're in as a sham/not a proper relationship. Ultimately, most people who aren't sociopathic aren't going to want to look into the mirror and see a cheat....so they have to find ways of justifying to themselves why they behaved as they did. Or they might just tell a barefaced lie to others and say "I've never cheated on anybody....I regard that kind of behaviour as utterly abhorrent." I think relatively few people are as upfront as Heaven/Hell and will say "I cheated, and I regret it" without adding some "but there was justification" qualification. It's the catch 22 with having expectations about other people. The higher your expectations, the higher the likelihood that other people are going to be dishonest with you in an attempt to convince you that they meet those expectations....so I guess that you need to couple having expectations with having very strong instincts for when people are BSing you. But no, I don't think any of your expectations sound unreasonable. Edited August 13, 2012 by Taramere
Ninjainpajamas Posted August 13, 2012 Posted August 13, 2012 (1) To want someone who hasn't cheated in a past relationship? (2) To want someone who hasn't engaged in a threesome? (3) To want someone who hasn't engaged in sex with someone knowing he/she had a significant other? Just go for average nice guys, you shouldn't have that big of a problem. Many men with desirable qualities however will likely either had 1 or 2 on his wrap-sheet, or both based off what I've seen. You also have to take into consideration the man may never admit it If he suspects you are conservative in your morals and doesn't want you to back off...once you are emotionally invested in a man I seriously doubt you would back away and stick hard to your criteria.
Later82012 Posted August 18, 2012 Posted August 18, 2012 Very reasonable though I have done the threesome thing. The cheating thing would be an absolute dealbreaker though. I find nothing wrong with threesomes as long as everybody knows the score and it is done honestly. What do you mean by this?
AlexCross Posted August 18, 2012 Posted August 18, 2012 (1) To want someone who hasn't cheated in a past relationship? (2) To want someone who hasn't engaged in a threesome? (3) To want someone who hasn't engaged in sex with someone knowing he/she had a significant other? In my opinion it is called having standards. Just like you wouldn't want to date a former pedophile, you have a right to taylor the chacteristics your future partner has. A lot of people disagree with me but although a persons sexual past is their past, it speaks volumes of their character. 1
AlexCross Posted August 18, 2012 Posted August 18, 2012 (1) To want someone who hasn't cheated in a past relationship? (2) To want someone who hasn't engaged in a threesome? (3) To want someone who hasn't engaged in sex with someone knowing he/she had a significant other? Actually up until recently the threesome thing was on my disqualifier list until I had two of them, so I would be a major hypocrite if I added that to my disqualifier list. But cheating and being with someone they had a significant other i concur with.
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