dovahkiin Posted August 11, 2012 Posted August 11, 2012 (edited) Hello. I am new here. I would like your advice on my failed relationship. About a week ago, my boyfriend broke up with me, we've been together for 10 months. For the last couple of months, Ive been in Belgium to study and he's been in Malaysia. I am 22 years old and he is 26. During the long distance relationship, he keeps provoking me, making me think that he's dating another woman when he's just going out with his friends, but when I get angry, he said that I was being paranoid. But later when I talked to him, he admit that he's provoking me on purpose to see my reaction. And later on broke up with me saying, "I hate you. I dont want to talk to you, stay away from me." In which I did stay away from him. And a couple of days later, he sent an inbox on my facebook saying "Goodluck for your test." I didnt reply. And he sent another text about my cats but I didnt reply to that also, and he gets pissed off at me. I have 2 kittens which I left in Malaysia for a friend to take care of. But she's going on a planned on holiday and the kittens were supposed to be at my ex boyfriend's house. We've agreed on this while we were still together. But somehow he keeps asking me about those kittens, like, "what should I do with them" Lol. What the hell does he mean by that? He should take them from the cat-stitter and put them in his house. So after a couple of messages that he have sent to me, I decided to reply in a very formal manner telling him on how to handle the kittens. And he said that I was very lame to speak "formally" to him. And then he sent another messages concerning the kittens and said that I am irresponsible for putting the kittens at his house and not giving complete instructions. I dont know what kind of instructions he wants, but whatever it is, he should just ask nicely. Well, he did ask after that but in a very rude way. I was tremendously upset, but I manage to reply to him calmly. And he keeps updating his facebook status to provoke me...for example, "it's hard to deal with irresponsible people" and a couple of hurtful statuses like that. I dont know what to do. He broke it off with me, he gets pissed off when I dont reply to him, but when I do, he tries to provoke me. What should I do. This is really upsetting. I was getting along just fine, picking myself up for the past few days. And now he comes along and provoking me to argue with him. WHY?? P/S: Sorry though for the long post and my bad English Edited August 11, 2012 by dovahkiin typo
TaraMaiden Posted August 11, 2012 Posted August 11, 2012 What should I do. This is really upsetting. I was getting along just fine, picking myself up for the past few days. And now he comes along and provoking me to argue with him. WHY?? P/S: Sorry though for the long post and my bad English This is actually a very easy problem to solve. the only reason he can get to you - IS BECAUSE YOU LET HIM. If he is your ex, if you are broken up, if the relationship is over, then I suggest the following: One: Block his phone on your mobile, delete his details off your email, and block him there too, and defriend him off Facebook. Do not accept or entertain any further attempts by him to draw you into any kind of discussion whatsoever. Two: Read "The All-New Caliguy No Contact Guide" in my signature. Better yet, copy, paste into a word.doc, print it off, paste a copy on every single wall in your house/apartment, and carry a copy with you at all times to refer to. He's not contacting you because he loves you. People who love you don't do that. He keeps contacting you to get under your skin, annoy you, and invade your mental space. he is doing his level best to keep you on a string, and he's succeeding - because you're letting him. The question is never, "Why is my ex- doing *this*...?" The question is "What do I do about it?" And what you do, is to follow my advice 100%. 1
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