Why does my partner appear psycho? Trust issues, false assumptions/accusations

[TaraMaiden]

DOT, I'm pretty sure this guy has put me on ignore, principally because what I tried to tell him, was too near the knuckle and smarted too much.

 

The fundamental line is that he doesn't WANT to take any responsibility for his role in the marriage, it should be ALL on her shoulders, he's the injured party, and he doesn't like hearing that no matter what the issues, it takes two to tango.

 

She could not have laid a finger on him if he hadn't been there.

 

He should have manned up a bit earlier, and walked.

The signals, red flags and issues were there a good while before it got physical.

 

Had he become a member, and posted WHILE this was all going on, we would all of us - regardless of gender - told him to get the hell out of there, as fast as his legs could carry him.

 

He wants her to say sorry, be contrite, regret what she did, and apologise.

If she has a mental disorder, and she refuses in any way whatsoever, to take that on board, then you and I both know that it's unlikely to happen.

 

If that is the proviso though, for letting go, healing, forgiving and moving on to rebuild - then the damage will never be repairable.

 

And that, actually, is a great shame.

[dreamingoftigers]

I, um, don't exactly know what to say about it.

 

Hopefully M30USA can move past the pain and start to see that everyone is not trying to re-victimize him.

 

Hopefully Garfish can make everything repaired in this R or move onto a happier one.

 

TM, hopefully the Olympics was a boon fir your business, although can't recall exactly what it is you do.

[TaraMaiden]

TM, hopefully the Olympics was a boon fir your business, although can't recall exactly what it is you do.

 

Ooooh, thereby hangs a seriously off-topic tale!!

 

 

Short PM coming up....

[Garfish]

Hey TM thanks for your input but I've decided to heck with it. I'm done, over, out of there. I deserve better than this.

[TaraMaiden]

Ok.

Be happy. It's important.

 

And if you're not happy - get happy.

 

All the very best, and I wish you well.

 

hope you stick around....

[Garfish]

Hey moderators!!! Just want to thank you for changing the title. It sounds a lot closer to what I actually meant. Again, sorry about that.

[Garfish]

Update: A few hours short of a week, I just couldn't stand it anymore and I had to tell her. I called her and reminded her of our attempted reconciliation. She made yet another super-lame excuse for not calling me in 7 days. "I was busy with work" and "The tree limbs were down, I had to cut them". So she couldn't give me a 5 minute phone call or respond to my one short email from last Thursday night? Anyways I told her that's it, I can't do this anymore. I need CERTAINTY in my life; I can't be in a limbo of not knowing whether I am in a relationship or not. And her not calling me/not having anything to do with me for long periods was one of the sticking points in the relationship. So I did it, I broke NC to tell her we are through, because I am not going to go out and start with someone else if she didn't know (I'm not a cheater!).

 

Maybe I've just thrown away true love, or maybe I've escaped from 12 years of being treated as an accessory at best, a nuisance at worst. Anyways it's DONE!!!

 

Thanks to everyone who pitched in with advice on this board.

[William]

Hey moderators!!! Just want to thank you for changing the title. It sounds a lot closer to what I actually meant. Again, sorry about that.

In the future, if you wish a title edited/changed, simply alert on the thread-starting post and provide the preferred title.

[veggirl]

OP I hope you stick with being done with her. She sounds unhinged. She will be back, I'm sure, if you go No Contact, so I hope you're prepared with how you will handle that? goodluck!! (and sorry about people threadjacking your whole damn thread...FFS nothing can be posted on LS without people screaching and making s.hit men v women :rolleyes::rolleyes: )