glitterbug91 Posted August 10, 2012 Posted August 10, 2012 So I messaged this guy in the beginning of April on OKC and we've been talking on a weekly basis ever since. Each of the messages exceeds the 10,000 character limit so it takes a while to write. He also added me on Facebook (and we would like each other's statuses, etc.) but he recently posted a status saying that he is briefly deactivating his account to be more productive. I do not have his number yet. We do not live in the same city (he lives an hour and ten minutes away). He also said he's carless because of a car accident and he doesn't have money to buy a new one yet. I don't know how he gets around (he might use his parents). He is a film graduate student so he's making a student film to graduate with his masters and says it takes up so much of his time. He told me upfront that he could only communicate "somewhat infrequently" and was thinking about starting to date in the fall closer to when he graduates. He told me he's only seriously talked to one person so far besides me (so I'm assuming he hasn't met anyone in real life yet). He's only been in two relationships before (one lasted three years, the other three months). I have never been in an official relationship before and he is aware of my inexperience. He himself says he doesn't know the normal rules of dating either. My problem is it's been months that we've been talking and I'm not sure where this is going. He's dropped hints like "if we meet up we'll bla bla bla" or "when we meet up bla bla" or "I have to be with you when you watch this movie". I wasn't brave enough to drop hints myself until last week when I said "If and when you're ready to meet up we can bla bla". He took the bait and responded to that by saying that his friend who is also a filmmaker has been asking him to come down to the city I live in to help him with reshoots. He said he's been waiting all summer for his friend so that he has an excuse to tell me that while he's down there, he'll hang out with me. He said any week now, his friend might ask him and he said he'll ask to hang out with me when he does. I responded by saying that he doesn't need an excuse to come visit. I haven't gotten his response yet. I'm just confused. Does he seem worth it to you? Do you think he's just trying to be slow because of my inexperience? Or do you think he's being shy and I need to be more assertive? Or have I been pen pal zoned? I just don't want to waste all these months for nothing. If you need anymore info, let me know!
Leegh Posted August 11, 2012 Posted August 11, 2012 He could be shy, and if that is the case, you could suggest once (maybe twice at most) that he visit you, etc. If he doesn't take the bait after one or two times, you may want to give up.
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