Lolamola Posted August 9, 2012 Posted August 9, 2012 ... That they want you back ? When they don't directly say it ? What are some signs ?
Appleness Posted August 10, 2012 Posted August 10, 2012 If they dumped you, then no other signs but the words "I want you back" will suffice. Everything else will be breadcrumbs. That's just my opinion. If it's too easy for 'em, they'll do it again and again. Good luck 1
TaraMaiden Posted August 10, 2012 Posted August 10, 2012 ... That they want you back ? When they don't directly say it ? What are some signs ? There are NO signs when they don't directly say it. Read the "All-New Caliguy No Contact Guide" in my signature: It's all carefully laid out and explained there - but as Appleness states - anything short of "I made the most dreadful mistake of my life and I want you back" - is just hot air. 1
Author Lolamola Posted August 11, 2012 Author Posted August 11, 2012 Sure! I shoudnt go with less than a direct apology, Thankyou !
soccerrprp Posted August 11, 2012 Posted August 11, 2012 Yup, forget about signs...wait for the words to the effect "i made a mistake, i'm sorry" or "i missed you and realize what a mistake i've made"....etc. i would also really add that a serious "pre-get back together" talk be in order here, too. Both must be willing to hash out the past poo poos, before moving forward in a healthier manner...
CaliGuy Posted August 12, 2012 Posted August 12, 2012 ... That they want you back ? When they don't directly say it ? What are some signs ? Honestly, it sounds like you're waiting around for them to change their heart but in truth, when someone walks away, it's because they believe: a. They can do better than you. b. They have a lot of options, so why settle? c. They're just not into you... or... d. They just don't have that "loving feeling".... Let me ask you a question: "Why would you wait around hoping for one particular person to change their feelings (which the odds of that happening are worse than winning the lottery) when the RIGHT person who you have been waiting for all along never gets to meet you?" In other words, if you are wallowing around in the mud over someone you love but does not feel the same only blocks other people, perhaps the right one, the opportunity to meet you. If I've learned anything over the years over chasing people who did not feel the same way as I did, is that the longer I pursed them or hoped they would change their mind, I missed out on the RIGHT person in the process. Now, some tough love... They aren't coming back. Understand it, deal with it and move on. I'm sorry if you disagree or think I am full of crud, but you're talking with a guy who has dealt with this several times throughout his life (and there's being dead once too) and I've learned that when someone walks away from me the very best thing I did was LET THEM GO.... 2
DisGai Posted August 13, 2012 Posted August 13, 2012 I'd like to chime in to say that I believe some dumpers will have a difficult time straight-up confessing their feelings (wanting the dumpee back) before any catching-up is done. They might start by trying to get in contact (if the dumpee was LC/NC) and after their presence is "approved," they might confess their feelings. It's what happened to me at least..and it seemed pretty logical that my dumper-Ex followed that path. If anything, it might've been way too awkward for her to immediately say that she wanted me back before we've even gotten the time to catch-up and talk. But ultimately, the dumper will have to fess up, that's for sure. They can't just keep quiet and act like it's a new relationship when there is some reconciliation that must be done. Feel free to read about my current status in a path to reconciliation: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/breaking-up-reconciliation-coping/second-chances/337563-dumper-ex-wants-reconciliation-so-lost
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