Chocolatebox Posted August 9, 2012 Posted August 9, 2012 I didn't expect it,but I woke up with a message on my phone... and... surprise! It's him. He wrote me something like: "Hi (my name),how are you? I know that maybe you don't want to hear from me,but it's ridicolous and sad not talking to each other,looks like we hate each other." What should I do? Ignore him? Just say I don't hate him? Reply after a day or two? I know NC means no contact at all,I just don't want to ruin everything. Right now I'd say I want him back,but not if he still acts as he did before. So I'm not ready right now. But,at the same time,I don't want to push him away. I just think it's too early and I want to heal completely before I do anything with him.I think he's afraid I'm gonna hate him or something like that. Basically,he wants to stay single but doesn't want to lose me forever and ever (that's what I suppose). Any advice?
Ruby65 Posted August 9, 2012 Posted August 9, 2012 He's not asking you if you want him back. All he's saying is, "I guess we don't talk anymore." That's called breadcrumbs.... and it's already got you trying to figure out if you want him back or not! He's just looking for ego strokes. He wants to make sure he can still keep you on the back burner as a Plan B in case he doesn't find anyone he likes better. My advice: delete and ignore.
2muchlove Posted August 9, 2012 Posted August 9, 2012 My advice? Listen to ruby. She knows what's up. 1
roshni.agarwal Posted August 9, 2012 Posted August 9, 2012 i was also in the same situation few months back.. my boyfriend text me and asked how am i and what am doing after NC of 3 months. I wanted him back so i replied, again we started the same thing like before but he never changed he did the same thing again and again broken up, so now i am feeling like why i hav replied him that time he texted , i should have avoid but i know its difficult to avoid when you actually love someone and to avoid his text messages. According to me just reply i am doing good and trying to do best with my life. hope you are also doing well. take care! or better if you can avoid and not feeling bad even aftr you wont reply to him then dont do, its best! Thats it and dont expect anything more because in my case second changes doesnt work, All the best for you!
weallfalldown Posted August 9, 2012 Posted August 9, 2012 He's not asking you if you want him back. All he's saying is, "I guess we don't talk anymore." That's called breadcrumbs.... and it's already got you trying to figure out if you want him back or not! He's just looking for ego strokes. He wants to make sure he can still keep you on the back burner as a Plan B in case he doesn't find anyone he likes better. My advice: delete and ignore. didn't she dump him??? if so they aint breadcrumbs?
Author Chocolatebox Posted August 9, 2012 Author Posted August 9, 2012 No,he dumped me... so maybe these are all breadcrumbs. It's not like I'm thinking he wants me back now. I'm fully aware he's just trying to make contact,but not asking for me back. It's just... I don't know. I'm afraid I'll ruin everything if I don't reply. Maybe he'll think I hate him and he'll move on faster and with more motivation than ever. All this situation makes me think he could miss me,but doesn't want me back. And I don't know what to do to make him want a second chance. We had a very strong bond, we dated for 3 years,and I know that it's both our fault if the relationship failed. I also think the main reason he left me was because of my clinginess and neediness. He felt suffocated. I'm not justifying his behaviour (he treated me badly during the last months of our relationship); I kinda hate him for what he did to me. Ughhh what a bad situation. Anyway,thank you for your advices.
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