AD1980 Posted August 9, 2012 Posted August 9, 2012 I think a big part of my failures with women is a trait that i have where im overly sensitive to rejection and people not liking me in general..Wheter its from hititng on a women and getting rejected or just somebody seemingly not liking me i take it too personally and as a slight on me and who iam as a person..i want to be liked too much.. The rare times i do hit on women and get rejected i beat myself up and think of course she doesnt like you you're not attractive or it must be my personality i must be a bore.. Believe me theres nothing more id rather be able to do then say f it their opinion means nothing and move on from rejection but its easier said then done when its just part of who you are..i want to break it in the worst way but i cant so far..
Els Posted August 9, 2012 Posted August 9, 2012 You're not going to like the answer, but here it is: Practice. Most sales people start out taking their rejections pretty tough. I mean, I understand, it's certainly not a nice feeling to be rejected. But eventually, as they stick it out and accustom themselves to it, they are able to view it in a different way: That the rejections don't really reflect on you. There are a hundred possible reasons the other person might not be interested, and not all of them are related to you. When they stop internalizing rejection, they can usually break past the barrier and see it as just another thing in a busy day. 1
somedude81 Posted August 9, 2012 Posted August 9, 2012 By just not giving a damn. Good luck putting that into action. There is also the keep trying over and over approach till you're numb. Just don't go crazy until you meet that point.
ThaWholigan Posted August 9, 2012 Posted August 9, 2012 You have to expose yourself to rejection more. It's going to be very very difficult but you have to keep going and keep doing it. I've had some harsh rejections, but most of the time it was never as though people "just didn't like me", but that they didn't have that same attraction. Not every woman is going to be attracted to you, and I accepted that I would at least appeal to a subsection rather than legions of women. After that, you just keep looking. Any bad thoughts you have about rejection have to be moderated, and accepted without making yourself feel worse. Meditation helps, and staying in the present moment (which you can find resources on how to do on google). Like I said, it's going to be hard, but it's going to be worth it, because you won't attach so much of your self worth to any rejection you may receive in life . 1
weallfalldown Posted August 9, 2012 Posted August 9, 2012 You have to expose yourself to rejection more. It's going to be very very difficult but you have to keep going and keep doing it. Spot on......
El Brujo Posted August 10, 2012 Posted August 10, 2012 It's easy! Just turn the situation around 180 degrees, and become the one doing the rejecting. Simple as that. Just don't try it on Tony Soprano.
SJC2008 Posted August 10, 2012 Posted August 10, 2012 Rejection from someon you like or want to be with will never be easy. I've gotten better with rejection. I'm to the point if I'm nuetral or less about a woman I won't give a duck. Now if I like her it sucks!
proseandpassion Posted August 10, 2012 Posted August 10, 2012 You cannot beat yourself up for the fact that someone you hardly know doesn't want to fall in love with you/have sex with you/etc. ON THE PLUS SIDE... Even if you get initially rejected, once you pursue and get shot down, you will always be on that woman/man's list of possible back up plans.
yongyong Posted August 10, 2012 Posted August 10, 2012 It depends on the situation. you've known her for a while and if she tells you LJBF then it should disappoint you. If you are talking about randomly hitting on women somewhere in public, you should change your mindset. 'you are passing out flyer about your product. there will be people who politely rejects it or even just ignores you. do you really have to feel bad about it or just brush it off and move on till you find someone who will stop, listen to your speech and give out their contact info to hear more?'
Necromancer Posted August 10, 2012 Posted August 10, 2012 Like somedude said, by not giving a ****. Motto: If you'll never try you ́ll never know. Try to get rejected, i have done it and after few rejections...they almost don´t sting a bit and i will still talk with 100% confidence.
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