dreamingoftigers Posted August 9, 2012 Posted August 9, 2012 He has constantly urged me to start resolving my issues. He has point blank said " Leigh, your issues are getting too much for me to handle" but he has ever been able to walk away, despite the fact he has had ENOUGH of my issues. Besides - I have talked about my uncertaintly about hookers with him, and he has said at times " geez Leigh, if it is so hard for you to get your head around it, I wont ever do it again, it is not an issue do stop making it one" The first paragraph is a very point-blank warning. I don't think you are seeing it. He is getting exasperated and it's time for you to work on your insecurities if you want to keep this relationship. I don't think that a relationship in and of itself "should" be the proper motivation to improve oneself, but, really, I won't tell if you don't. Being in a relationship with someone who has deep-seated insecurities that they don't handle on their own is very painful, challenging and frustrating. It's one thing to "share" them but it's another altogether to radio-blast them 24/7 to a partner that gets so stressed that all they can do is react. You need to give this guy a break and go back to counseling. It's really hard on guys in particular because it shames them to think that they've failed to make their partner happy. It's virtually instinctual. Men like happy women most of all because by some trick of the mind, it makes them feel successful. It's more than just talking about it.
Author Leigh 87 Posted August 9, 2012 Author Posted August 9, 2012 Leigh, there certainly are mean people on LoveShack and there are people who can be harsh (like me), but I think you know that there are quite a few people here who really care about you and who KNOW that you can help yourself to come to a place where this devastation doesn't have to be a regular part of your cycle of life. THANKS for believing in me:) I too, think I have great potential to have a healthy life. I am very self aware and open to change and bettering myself in any way, so I guess it helps that I am very willing to at least TRY to take the steps I need, and do the required work to get totally stable and mentally at ease. Andrew believes in me, or he would have left by now. But I do need to make a move now, or he will not stick around forever when I am like this. You know, he gets jealous too! When a guy from my stud course dropped me home, and I said " Jason just dropped me home and he came in for a bit and we hung out" he was like " grrr" ( his words HAH....via text) That said - he is not ACTUALLY in fear... he trusts me, but still has a " grr" moment. He will not caarry on about it at all, just an initial " grr" when I mention a guy and me, but that is it, he does not need me to pacify him at all... Just to tell him " no I am not attracted to them, I love yoU".. That is as far as HIS jealously goes.
dreamingoftigers Posted August 9, 2012 Posted August 9, 2012 I have not though had anything REALLY terrible happen to be that I can think messed me up. Um, so yeah. I have not ever had any big hardships, besides my father almpst dying when I was about 7, him hitting me a little, and my mother leaving and moving to another country,l and being depressed and suicidle when i ws a teenager. People go through way worse and come out of it totally fine, with great relationships? My boyfriend lost his mother recently, and is totally devastated all the time, yet he holds himself together and manages to EVER project ANY of his issues onto me. ? People go through much less and end up bonkers. It's all about your internal threshold. Parents divorced? I haven't met anyone unscathed from that yet. My abandonment trigger got set in infancy and cemented in when my grandmother who was raising me moved back to Ontario when I was 7, and she left me with "the crazies" (my parents). As for the bf's mom, he is vulnerable to going outside the R for about 18 months after his mom's death. Just stats though, don't go freaking out about it. Just watch his signs.
Kamille Posted August 9, 2012 Posted August 9, 2012 My mum moved to China when I was about 10. I had a sick, bad feelig for about a year, but got over it. I became totally immune to her absence. But would cry at the airport when saying goodbye or when greeting her. I have since stopped that. I do not get emotional seeing her or saying goodbye at all now. But I have not really had a hardship that I can think of? My parents were very loving. However, I was ugl growing up and had a HELL of a time in high school. As in, utter hell - constant bullying, no friends... That is why I go anorexia, partially - to say a big " EFF YOU, I am not fitter, thinner, and hotter than YOU @ssholes, hahahaa the jokes on YOU" So I had a hell of a time in high school, having no friends at all, eating lunch in the toilets daily, crying every single day, and the thought of dying comforted me. I have not though had anything REALLY terrible happen to be that I can think messed me up? My dad hit me because I made him really angry, but it is not hsi fault, because he has a VERY bad heart condition!!!1 he had a 6 tuple bi pass at age 38. He is a very sick man and could die any minute. I was so troubled and such an @sshole as a teen, that he could not deal with me and hit me a few times. He hated it though and felt awful. And was clearly a loving and good father. My mum never saw him act violent towards anyone besides me. Um, so yeah. I have not ever had any big hardships, besides my father almpst dying when I was about 7, him hitting me a little, and my mother leaving and moving to another country,l and being depressed and suicidle when i ws a teenager. People go through way worse and come out of it totally fine, with great relationships? My boyfriend lost his mother recently, and is totally devastated all the time, yet he holds himself together and manages to EVER project ANY of his issues onto me. I guess I am VERY vulnerable; I love him more than I thought was possible, and the fact we are so close, makes any sort of cheating unfathomable... Maybe that is why I lesson things in the relationship and try to find ways it is not working - because we are VERY close, to the point where I cannot fathom our bond ending, and so try to ruin it before it finishes naturally? Leigh, I have abandonment issues and here is why. I grew up with a suicidal mother. I've done therapy to investigate how growing up conscious that my mother might kill herself has affected me. It's been very helpful. My parents are still together and I was never beaten. But growing up with a suicidal parent was enough to cause me to struggle with relationships in my life. I urge you not to dismiss your upbringing. You feel fine with it because you developed coping strategies that has helped you accept the fact that your dad almost died, your mom was suicidal, your parents divorced, your dad beat you, your mother left. These coping strategies are likely mostly helpful to help you in your every day life, but some of them are likely based on cognitive distortions. Speaking to a therapist about what you went through and how you came to accept it will hep you. As I have learned, you can be admit that you have had a tough childhood and still love your parents. Not that your childhood needs to be the most traumatic for you to seek counseling. But I do think your experiences do explain why you get so anxious when Andrew leaves. Finally, when you do seek counseling, I recommend you discuss your sexual experiences past and present with your therapist. Sexuality seems to be one of the major area where you try to exhort control over your relationship, be it by allowing a hooker in the relationship or by focusing on your sexual desirability, the look of your vagina, etc. A therapist could help you figure out why, when anxious, you think sexuality can help you control your relationship. 1
SushiX Posted August 9, 2012 Posted August 9, 2012 You sound very needy. Give the man some space. Geez!
dreamingoftigers Posted August 9, 2012 Posted August 9, 2012 GIGS is fun.... People trying to rationalize with an irrational person.... Me Me Me Me Me.... What the heck does this have to do with GIGS? Leigh: working on that abandonment trigger would be a huge asset for counseling as well. 1
irin Posted August 10, 2012 Posted August 10, 2012 i think your doing the right thing. and for people commenting on your insecurities, i see it in your posts but i also believe that he played a major role in making you even more insecure. from the very beginning i dont know how you stayed with him after he made those comments on your body and comparing you to his "perfect" ex. good luck to i hope you find true love one day. and win this battle you have on yourself.
Author Leigh 87 Posted August 10, 2012 Author Posted August 10, 2012 i think your doing the right thing. and for people commenting on your insecurities, i see it in your posts but i also believe that he played a major role in making you even more insecure. from the very beginning i dont know how you stayed with him after he made those comments on your body and comparing you to his "perfect" ex. good luck to i hope you find true love one day. and win this battle you have on yourself. But he does think we have true love together. He tells me he can see himself marrying me, and that lfie together is a lovely thought, rather than a supressing one. There is a chance he genuinely would act this way to a girl he does truly love; going away and being too laid back to bother contacting them, assuming that because they are very close and in love, that he should be able to go have fun with his mates and party around a bunch of hot girls every night when he is majorly drunk. He ACTS like he loves me when we are together... We very much live our lives together. I told him I do not want to bother with him, if I am just a security blanket who he loves having and LOVES like family, but is not a girl he " truly" loves. I do not he adores and loves me for who I am- with my faults and all. However, maybe he just THINKS he is in true love with me, when in reality he does not KNOW what true love is, as he is et to experience it? I KNOW he is very laid back - he is the type of guy who would go away and want to have fun... I AM NOT SURE if he would change his whole persona and character, if he is suddenly in " true love" with a girl...... I am not SURE at this stage, if it is ME, or if he would act this way with a girl he was in " true" love with. I know he likes spending all his time with me albiet one night per week with hsi " guy" mates having beer and playing polker. I know he ACTS like he DOES love me................. He does act like he adores me ind ay to day life... But I just think it is telling that a man who is so attatched to me in our daily lifes, can still go over seas and not miss me enough to call me or message me o facebook. I feel like while he really REALLY cares for me and while I am still the closest and most important person in his life, besides his family, that that does NOT necessarily mean it is true ROMANTIC love.. I am beginning to wonder if he just loves me platonically ( as I KNOW hel oves me on some level), and that it is just platonic love, with a girl he also enjoys sex with because we are attracted to each other physically. Either way, I am a sweet and caring girl to him; I clea his hosue and do all the cleaning up for him which he loves.... I look after him and shower hi with love and attention.... Do is washing, do a lot for him emotionally and in terms of pragmatic hosuehold ways..... I do not deserve to sit here, wondering if the fact he has not felt the urge to keep ion contact paints him as a guy that simply does not miss me THAT much. It is so annoying how he claims to love me so much and want to be with me every day, when he does not miss me enough to call me or message me when he is a way..... Then there are the people whos a he MAY very well be in love with me, and that this is ismply just his style... He is a selfish and carefree sorto f person who just goes and does thigns without thinking about m ethods of contact and the consequences of his actions... he is NOT a deep thinker about emotional things at all, he is bad at being late for things and not cancelling appointments,.,
Author Leigh 87 Posted August 10, 2012 Author Posted August 10, 2012 i think your doing the right thing. and for people commenting on your insecurities, i see it in your posts but i also believe that he played a major role in making you even more insecure. from the very beginning i dont know how you stayed with him after he made those comments on your body and comparing you to his "perfect" ex. good luck to i hope you find true love one day. and win this battle you have on yourself. ANd he is very positive about my body. He was very, very immature and ignorant about female genitalia and he had never bee close up to a vagina ( or " vulva" technically) before, and so when I asked what his aversion was to mine, he just said it was different to the last and ONLY one he had ever got close and personal with. That was a LONG time ago - I told him he was incredibly immature ad mis informed, and he has since changed completely on the issue. He never tell sme his ex is better than me in any way. He made that one comment regarding her sexually, early on in our relationship.
Author Leigh 87 Posted August 10, 2012 Author Posted August 10, 2012 When he comes back and I decide to not see him, I honestly think he will miss me a great deal. We act in a way around each other that goes much deaper than how we can be with other people. We just have a very funny and special dynamic between us. It reminds me of my parents, how my parents are adoring of one another in a true way - not a wishy washy, lovey dovey fairy tale way, but in a wa where they know each other's flaws, et still stay and revell in each others quirks and interact in a way that only very close people do.... When he realized the immense pain and suffering his absence has caused me - and once I tell him " look Andrew, put yourself in MY shoes.... If I went partying and drinking every night with a bunch of dudes who were trying to crack onto me every night for ten days, would YOU feel crash hot about ME not contacting you at all?" I am not going to lose it and interigate him and have it out with him; I am simply going to ask hm to put himself in my shoes, tell him I was not happy or comfortable without an contact in this stuation, but that I am not blaming him seeing as we did not dscuss communication and the fact I needed him to keep in touch with me. I have not accepted never having our old " thing" again.. I have no accepted never sleeping with him in my bed again ( that I am not sitting in). Any ways I will probably cry for a bit now. I do every day at some point. I feel better for it though. He will either come home and have missed me a great deal and want to contunie building a close relationship, OR he will realise they hey, he did nto miss me the way he once did and that he did accidently cheat on me..... If he comes back and has not cheated, has missed me a great deal, and genuinely promises he has not cheated - he will still have to prove to me and show me really loves me and put the work inti showing me I am the one for him. I may be open to being with him and will not discount it - but I also know everything might change - he could have gotten too drunk and danced too close to a lot of girls and lost the plot and cheated and regreted it. I know he cares a lot about me still, albiet perhaps not ij a true love, romantic sense - if he HAS cheated, when he tells me and he sees me break down in front of him, I KNOW he will feel like dirt. And I KNOW I will NOT take back a cheater.:sick::sick::sick: I do not understand how people do it, the relationship would NEVEr feel the same!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Mme. Chaucer Posted August 10, 2012 Posted August 10, 2012 You need to stop trying to analyze Andrew and define what YOUR boundaries and needs are. Therapy can help you with that. From what I know of you, I think you try so hard to be the "cool" girlfriend that Andrew probably has no idea that anything at all is required of him. I imagine you gave him the impression that he should go off and have a blast with his buddies and not give you a second thought while he was away. If you had need for regular contact (I would), I think you should have let him know that upfront. Your concerns about him cheating are kind of second tier, from my perspective. I think it's thoughtless and disrespectful of him to not contact you. Though I still hold that you needed to let him know that you expected regular contact in order to feel okay while he was gone. On the other hand … you are in a relationship with a guy who loves to get drunk and party evidently above all else (you've mentioned this many times in your posts, if you don't remember, look back and see for yourself) , so I guess you get all that comes with it. This doesn't mean he can't love you. THERAPY. 3
Author Leigh 87 Posted August 10, 2012 Author Posted August 10, 2012 Chaucer - he THINKS he loves me. But he is also not a deap thinker about emotions, and I do not know if he can trust his feelings lol. A lot of guys can think they are deaply in love, as he has said he is with me once, and actually move on to realize that they were NOT in fact in love, but merely loved and cared a great deal for the girl. I think there is a chance we are just VERY attached and adore each other and love our time together SO much - but that it is attachment love, and not romantic, deap, TRUE love... but that it is still a very strong love, the sort you have for family members. ....MOST guys who are really romantically in love with their girlfriends, do not go overseas partying without them for startes. Al though in ANdrew's defence, he did not go looking for it, and I know he would not do it besides this one off time; I have made it clear and he says he would not want a girlfriend who could nto afford to travel with him - he does not WANT to party around the world without his girlfriend. Although he said he would not just leave me, and would pay for me if I could not afford it, and would rather wait loger and pay for me if I do not save enough and make enough money. As far as I can tell, this is a one off thing, and he knows and does not want to go parting overseas without me again; he KNOWS it is a deal breaker, if this is NOT a one off instance... He knows very loud and clear I will move on and never look back if he does this again - if this is NOT a once off thing. I am just TORN - guys that really love their partners in a romantic sese do not party overseas, and if they did, they WOULD CONTACT their girl! ALL guys I know who are in true, romantic love with their partners, would CALL their girlfriend daily or most days! ..The fact Andrew does not feel the need to call or facebook me, shows that although he THINKS he loves me, that perhaps he doesn't. Or, on the other hand, this may just be the person he is, eve to grils he loves. By the way. I am so devastated and lost that I am numb to my feelings. The gravity of the situation is too big to me to proccess - how close we have been and what we have together, and imagining NEVER having him over here in my bed again - is TOO BIG to accept and fathom.... Hence, I am numb to my feelings, because the are too big to process. although I do cry a little every day. I am at a total loss here. I feel lost, ill, and numb about the fact a guy I live with every day and who I am terribly close to, is out partying and very drunk, around a lot of girls, without contacting me. It is killing me.
Kamille Posted August 10, 2012 Posted August 10, 2012 Leigh, I can tell that you're responding to your feelings of abandonment again. I get the impression that Andrew's absence is making you feel lost. I also get the impression, from you, that you struggle to deal with negative emotions. As soon as you have them, you imagine scenarios that explain them. These scenarios stem from your worst fears: Andrew abandoning you. These scenarios are in your imagination. They also send you in a tailspin because they turn what is a normal negative reaction to Andrew's lack of contact into a crisis. I think the first step, for you, is to learn to deal with negative emotions. Can you describe how you feel right now? Are you feeling sad? Worried? Anxious? Please take a moment to acknowledge that feeling. Then tell yourself: I'm allowed to feel this way. Then, put it in perspective. You live with Andrew and you miss him. Your feelings of sadness and anxiety are normal. Please stop trying to imagine what he is thinking and doing. I suggest you write to him instead and tell him you miss him and want to hear from him. 1
Author Leigh 87 Posted August 10, 2012 Author Posted August 10, 2012 I need a little help h ere. I am not doing well, I see this man every day normally and I cannot handle suddenly not hearing from him, especially under these conditions. I know he wants to drink and party in this phase pf his life, but we both acted like it would happen TOGETHER. ALso - I do not drink anymore, I am saving it until I have a job and my career on track, I have been working out and keeping healthy and happy, and can THEN sit back and have a drink and have a night out. Andrew nor I need to drink to be fulfilled in life. We ar every amazed by life in general, and have enough to do without partying. In fact,. before Anrew left, we NEVER partied or felt the urge to that badly. We enjoy it, but we like life enough to not do it too. So I am just crying now, not having a clue what is going on with him and NOT being at all okay about it. That said - I have been working out more, eating better, and making new friends lately. Tomorrow I am catching up with a very decent friend of mine I met during my short stint at Uni - and I have friends I have made in my Tourism and Aviation course. I am doing things to make me feel better about myself and it is working of course. But I go everywhere with Andrew, we live our life together most of the time albiet one day a week to ourselves for " me" time, and time for him with his mates to catch up. I feel like his " side kick" that accompanies him everywhere, laughing and joking and having fun all the way. I am very crushed and am at a total loss right now, I AM NOT OKAY with him partying with girls whilst DRUNK, without contacting me. I AM JUST NOT okay with this...IN FACT, it makes me sick. I did not tell him any of this, but I will tell him when he gets back that he just can ever do this again if he wants to be with me.
Author Leigh 87 Posted August 10, 2012 Author Posted August 10, 2012 Leigh, I can tell that you're responding to your feelings of abandonment again. I get the impression that Andrew's absence is making you feel lost. I also get the impression, from you, that you struggle to deal with negative emotions. As soon as you have them, you imagine scenarios that explain them. These scenarios stem from your worst fears: Andrew abandoning you. These scenarios are in your imagination. They also send you in a tailspin because they turn what is a normal negative reaction to Andrew's lack of contact into a crisis. I think the first step, for you, is to learn to deal with negative emotions. Can you describe how you feel right now? Are you feeling sad? Worried? Anxious? Please take a moment to acknowledge that feeling. Then tell yourself: I'm allowed to feel this way. Then, put it in perspective. You live with Andrew and you miss him. Your feelings of sadness and anxiety are normal. Please stop trying to imagine what he is thinking and doing. I suggest you write to him instead and tell him you miss him and want to hear from him. But I would feel like a fool telling him that, when he is partying with a buch of girls, all drunk, without contacting me. I am not sure he misses me in the way he always has before this trip. I feel like how he felt about me before the trip is not true anymore. The distance and lack of contact makes me feel like..... he has realised he is not that into me anymore:(:(:o I am not sure what is real anymore. I know he once missed me a lot when he was away for a month and we had daily contact. We missed each other like crazy - and we have only gotten much closer since then. Him not being here, him partying with lots of girls, and him being drunk arond them and dancing close to them which he would be doing, makes what we had feel irrelevant and meaningless. What he is doing right now as we speak, makes me feel SICK:sick::sick::sick::sick: I feel utterly sick and empty.
Author Leigh 87 Posted August 10, 2012 Author Posted August 10, 2012 I am crying a lot now and feel like a robot who has numbed out all her feelings. I feel like I do not know what is real and what is not; because his love for me was so real before in the past, and yet I am not sure it is true now or is even real. I feel like a HUGE chunk of my life, our daily loving relationship we had for months, is not real. Therefore, I feel a little " dead" The one thing I DO know, is: Andrew probably knew very deap down that I would be like this, but he is not a deap enough thinker to acknowledge it, and he wants the " cool" girlfriend..... to be easy going asnd trust him with this situation... I KNOW that he will feel terrible about how awful I feel. If he had acknowledged that I WOULD feel like this, he would NOT have gone.... I KNOW he would not have gone if he realized I would be like this..... And that on a spiratual and deap level, he KNEW I would be like this, but over looked it. I feel he truly knows me and on one some level, he would KNOW I would lsoe the plot and not be okay with things. When I tell him all this, I am sure he will be like " I thought you may be like this...." I feel sick I feel sick I feel sick.......................... This is hell.
Kamille Posted August 10, 2012 Posted August 10, 2012 You have no contact, so you don't actually know what he is doing, feeling or thinking. You don't actually know that he is partying with lots of girls. What you do know is that you're in a lot of pain. Managing that pain is your responsibility. You are in a relationship with Andrew, and that means you have to ask for what you need in order to be happy in your relationship. Right now, you need contact. Ask for it. ETA: you say yourself he will feel bad when he finds out what you are putting yourself through. Ask for contact and nobody needs to feel bad anymore. 1
Art_Critic Posted August 10, 2012 Posted August 10, 2012 Are you saying that you have a problem with him getting drunk all the time ? I have seen in your posts that it seems to come up quite often.. Maybe that is the bigger issue.. maybe you are involved with someone who has a problem with drinking and in turn it's causing a problem in your relationship with him.
Author Leigh 87 Posted August 10, 2012 Author Posted August 10, 2012 And I have guys calling me asking me to come and hang out with them, who are interested in having sex with me or a relationship... I love Andrew though and cannot fathom letting another guy have me in an intimate way. I wonder if he is as keen to safeguard the relationship as I am. These guys who want me make me really sad:( Because I have a guy I want to hear from so desperately, that any other guy pales in comparison. A guy rang me tonight at midnight, and I just thought " oh please, f8ck off, I just want to hear from Andrew and talking to YOU just makes me realize how much I love and miss Andrew..." When this guy called, at first from a private number, I PRAYED it was Andrew and wished for it to be HIM so much. I was SO upset when it was just some guy who wanted to get into my pants, and/or have a relationship with me. Of course, the guy on the phone is ignorant and had the audacity to say " if he cared he would call you". Like THANKS MATE, I actually know he cares about me thanks, not that you would know anything about his level of care for me..... Talking to to other guys just makes me SAD.
Mme. Chaucer Posted August 10, 2012 Posted August 10, 2012 What happened to the courses you were going to take? I think that along with therapy, you really need some serious structure in your life and need to be accountable for stuff that has nothing to do with your boyfriend or your body. Of course, those things are important too, but you need to be in school or to have responsibilities to other people (like a job) where you are required to uphold your end of things even when your emotions are leading you on a miserable chase. Leigh- Are your parents both overseas now? Are you living in their home with Andrew?
Mme. Chaucer Posted August 10, 2012 Posted August 10, 2012 Are you saying that you have a problem with him getting drunk all the time ? I have seen in your posts that it seems to come up quite often.. Maybe that is the bigger issue.. maybe you are involved with someone who has a problem with drinking and in turn it's causing a problem in your relationship with him. I get this, too. It seems to bother you, Leigh, but also it seems that you can't allow this because it's not "okay" or "cool," or maybe it's controlling, to have a problem with your boyfriend's desire to get sh*tfaced and party all the time. You know what? Maybe it's not "cool" but if it pushes a lot of buttons for YOU, then you need to acknowledge that for yourself.
Author Leigh 87 Posted August 10, 2012 Author Posted August 10, 2012 Are you saying that you have a problem with him getting drunk all the time ? I have seen in your posts that it seems to come up quite often.. Maybe that is the bigger issue.. maybe you are involved with someone who has a problem with drinking and in turn it's causing a problem in your relationship with him. I think Andrew has a slight drinking problem. He does not need to drink all the time; every weeend or two he drinks. Only a small handful of times since being together though, he has gotten BEYOND drunk, to the point where he went up to a girl in a club whe I WAS THERE, and in front of me, gave her a sexy massage. He honestly had no idea about it afterwards. So I think there is a chance he can drink to the point where he literally does not know where he is, who he is with, or what reality is. Which means if a lot of girls are on a dancefloor with him, and he is disorientated, he may very well cheat, and live to regret it. I know he would tell me if he cheated though; we are connected in a way where we know everything about each other and we would KNOW if somethiing was amiss. He drunk so much a couple of times he needed me to hold onto him in bed, reassure him like he was a bl00dy baby, he was unable to talk. This makes me feel sick, thinking of the fact he does that damage to himself:(:(:(:(:sick::sick::sick::sick::sick:
Author Leigh 87 Posted August 10, 2012 Author Posted August 10, 2012 Chaucer - I am studying Tourism and Aviation right now. I am also about to re register as a personal trainer. I am going to work very hard to gain employment as a travel agent, or as a wholesaler. I want the nince to five job that is a travel agent or travel wholesalers hours, and to then go and train people in the evenings. This is the career path I want most. To work two jobs I am passionate about, and earn the same money as though I had one job I hated but paid better. Trust me, I have 100% direction in my life, I know what I want in life. I just wanted Andrew to be a part of it.
Author Leigh 87 Posted August 10, 2012 Author Posted August 10, 2012 And while I NORMALLY live with Andrew or alone, both my parents are currentl down in Australia. My mother is the person I need around me,not my father so much. Having her here now is a godsend, I would be a total mess without her here, through this ordeal with Andrew. I can tell her how I feel about Andrew, as wel as several friends I have. They all offer support and advice. If I was living alone without ANdrew, or his little dogs I love like they were my own - I would be..... Not in a good place.
Kamille Posted August 10, 2012 Posted August 10, 2012 Leigh, What can you do, right now, that will help you feel better?
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