the ill-made knight Posted August 8, 2012 Posted August 8, 2012 Recently, I've gotten back in touch with my ex-boyfriend/first love. Over the past three years that we have been broken up we have talked once or twice, but never anything serious. Honestly, I think we were both too angry and hurt to have any in depth conversations and I was also in another relationship until about a month and a half ago. We have talked a good deal about giving things another shot now that we are older and more mature, but I am not sure whether that is what I really want to do or even a good idea. I ended our relationship because I suspected him of cheating. I never had any real concrete proof though and he maintains to this day that he was not cheating on me. I did however, have proof that he was talking to other women in a very flirtatious way; calling them baby, honey, sweetheart, etc. He was also communicating with one of his exes at the time and one woman that I know of told him that she loved him. There was no sexual content to any of the conversations [at least, not that I know of] and he has maintained that he never physically cheated on me with any of them though he admits he was wrong for talking to them at all as they were obviously interested in him and he was flirting with them. So fast forward three years, a failed long term relationship on my side, and him dating probably a dozen or so women. Time has matured me and also made me realize how much he has meant to me. I want to give things another go, but I am having a hard time trusting him still after all that has happened. I want to believe him, but I guess I'm just having a hard time doing so. Should I give things another go or just let sleeping dogs lie?
Dorian85 Posted August 11, 2012 Posted August 11, 2012 If you guys are going to start a new relationship, then you both need to start with a clear slate right off the bat. Part of maturing is understanding that what was in the past, is in the past. You have both pretty much moved on since your last relationship, so the "sins" of your past relationship shouldn't really effect the potential new relationship. If you cant let go of the past, you cant build a strong future. You both obviously still have strong enough feelings for each other that you are willing to be in a relationship again. You just have to realize that you have to treat this relationship like any of your other new ones, even though it is with a person whom you have already dated. On a side note, 3 years is a long time. You can learn a lot about yourself, as well as relationships, in that time. Ultimately, you will be the best judge when it comes to figuring out if the relationship has a second life or not. Good luck
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