ThaWholigan Posted August 8, 2012 Posted August 8, 2012 Ever since last week, I expected to feel like I normally do after I finally did it, and sure enough I do. However, something weird is happening. I seem to be more noticed by women now these days, even though I'm actually not trying to be noticed at the moment. Maybe there is the air of a man who has been laid recently or not, I don't know, but I'm getting more looks than ever from women - even much older than myself. Even those who are with their boyfriends, who gave me a few dirty looks too . I'm not even at my best physically (yet) so it's funny to me that I got all this attention even up to today when I was shopping earlier. Is all it takes one mutual sexual encounter to have a boost so significant that women can't help but notice you?? Or is it that I have actually become even more confident in myself since the incident and not completely been conscious of the change? 5
proseandpassion Posted August 8, 2012 Posted August 8, 2012 They can. Men can "sense" it, too. That's why a dry spell is so hard to get out of! All you need is one stroke of luck and you're off, though. Glad things are going well for you 1
Els Posted August 8, 2012 Posted August 8, 2012 Oh, Wholigan. You do know that the 'all I need is one girl to start me off and my life will be perfect so I don't need to do anything but wait!' guys are going to be all over this post... 7
MrCastle Posted August 8, 2012 Posted August 8, 2012 I think you're projecting. Those girls probably gave you looks pre-sexual encounter and you either ignored it or didn't realize it post-sexual encounter you're more confident and so you think the girls looking at you are checking you out. 4
Vintage79 Posted August 8, 2012 Posted August 8, 2012 I agree with MrCastle - they were always checking you out, but now you simply interpret the signals differently. In that sense, yes, a single woman will open the door - you're more confident, so you'll go for more of the opportunities that are made available to you. So can they smell confidence - not really, but they will certainly respond to it when it's demonstrated. 1
Author ThaWholigan Posted August 8, 2012 Author Posted August 8, 2012 Oh, Wholigan. You do know that the 'all I need is one girl to start me off and my life will be perfect so I don't need to do anything but wait!' guys are going to be all over this post... probably. But I think that the opportunity that I had would have been difficult for them to follow through with. I got it on a plate to an extent, sure, but I still could have messed it up. I think you're projecting. Those girls probably gave you looks pre-sexual encounter and you either ignored it or didn't realize it post-sexual encounter you're more confident and so you think the girls looking at you are checking you out. I suspect it is this. I have got a lot better at interpreting signals over the last few years, but I think it's likely that my subconscious willingness to ignore them because I'm "not quite at my best yet" has been overridden by last week and now I'm starting to notice it more and more. It's weird. I'm also even hornier, which I thought was impossible 1
yongyong Posted August 8, 2012 Posted August 8, 2012 Act nervous once you are out of her radar. Women doesn't like guys hitting on lots of women. they want to believe 'oh I am one of the few he cold approached' I pretty much hit on anything that walks and F-able by my standards at the bar and club. She is just one of 10 products I work on each week. Do I give a sxit about what they think? No.
proseandpassion Posted August 8, 2012 Posted August 8, 2012 Act nervous once you are out of her radar. Women doesn't like guys hitting on lots of women. they want to believe 'oh I am one of the few he cold approached' I pretty much hit on anything that walks and F-able by my standards at the bar and club. She is just one of 10 products I work on each week. Do I give a sxit about what they think? No. Oh you charming young thing! 1
fortyninethousand322 Posted August 8, 2012 Posted August 8, 2012 Is all it takes one mutual sexual encounter to have a boost so significant that women can't help but notice you?? Yup. I've always said as much.
Meeks7 Posted August 8, 2012 Posted August 8, 2012 They definitely do. My GF Beth tells me she knows when a guy is feeling self-assured or when he's kind of unsure of himself. It's as though girls, in her words, have this ability as sort of a 6th sense. 1
Author ThaWholigan Posted August 8, 2012 Author Posted August 8, 2012 Yup. I've always said as much. She won't fall into your lap though. Even though this girl seemed "easy" to everyone on here - most "easy" girls I know aren't so easy to get either . You still have to know what you're doing to an extent. That's why I don't believe that relying on one girl to help you will do it, because even if it were true, believing that this is what it will take will dis-empower you to such an extent that finding that girl will be particularly difficult.
Meeks7 Posted August 8, 2012 Posted August 8, 2012 Is all it takes one mutual sexual encounter to have a boost so significant that women can't help but notice you? Well to be fair, and give people a wider perspective, it doesn't HAVE to be strictly sexual. It can be as simple as having success in a variety of different life arenas: -Climbing Half Dome for example -Spear heading a large volunteer or acting project for a good cause -Excelling at your career job -Simply exercising good will to your fellow man and having that good flow come back to you -Exercising daily and eating right and being as fit as you can be etc. Basically, you can get the "glow" on your face through a wide variety of avenues. It doesn't have to be sexual and I think people fall when they only focus on making things all about the sexual end, thus exacerbating their own lack of self-confidence. With the opposite sex, there are so many parameters you can't control. That's why I encourage people to focus on things they can improve and change that doesn't necessarily rely on another person to participate. 3
pteromom Posted August 8, 2012 Posted August 8, 2012 Hey Wholigan - you lost it? I missed it! Where's the thread? Congratulations! 1
Author ThaWholigan Posted August 8, 2012 Author Posted August 8, 2012 Well to be fair, and give people a wider perspective, it doesn't HAVE to be strictly sexual. It can be as simple as having success in a variety of different life arenas: -Climbing Half Dome for example -Spear heading a large volunteer or acting project for a good cause -Excelling at your career job -Simply exercising good will to your fellow man and having that good flow come back to you -Exercising daily and eating right and being as fit as you can be etc. Basically, you can get the "glow" on your face through a wide variety of avenues. It doesn't have to be sexual and I think people fall when they only focus on making things all about the sexual end, thus exacerbating their own lack of self-confidence. With the opposite sex, there are so many parameters you can't control. That's why I encourage people to focus on things they can improve and change that doesn't necessarily rely on another person to participate. I agree with you and this focus is the reason why I was even able to have this sexual encounter in the first place in my opinion. I have a long way to go even in these other areas and these are more important to me largely. Focusing on the sexual encounter or placing the importance of being your turning point upon it is an exercise in futility, and I knew this and that's why I never did it.
Author ThaWholigan Posted August 8, 2012 Author Posted August 8, 2012 Hey Wholigan - you lost it? I missed it! Where's the thread? Congratulations! http://www.loveshack.org/forums/romantic/dating/338608-update-casual-encounter ^^^^^^^ It's here - it got a little controversial though And thank you
pteromom Posted August 8, 2012 Posted August 8, 2012 http://www.loveshack.org/forums/romantic/dating/338608-update-casual-encounter ^^^^^^^ It's here - it got a little controversial though And thank you Thanks! Too awesome. I am jumping up and down in my chair for you.
Author ThaWholigan Posted August 8, 2012 Author Posted August 8, 2012 What kinna attention do these ladies give u? I've been watched, stared at, today I was bumped into deliberately and the girl smiled very coyly afterwards , was smiled at a few times on the weekend, and I was approached by a girl who was no doubt quite young (18 at most) while I was in the chip shop (it wasn't for me, I'm on a diet ). Had a bit of banter and was on my way. A slightly older lady (late 30s) chatted to me while I was on the way to the post office too To be honest, this will sound very silly but - I was kinda overwhelmed by it , even a little embarrassed. I didn't feel much different than before so it was quite a surreal, pleasant but slightly overwhelming experience . 2
Imajerk17 Posted August 9, 2012 Posted August 9, 2012 I noticed an extra bit of confidence in your posts lately! Anyway, yeah. And in your case why wouldnt they? Good-looking, thoughtful, extremely intelligent and articulate, enjoys helping other people, wise and insightful way beyond your years...
Necris Posted August 9, 2012 Posted August 9, 2012 (edited) Ever since last week, I expected to feel like I normally do after I finally did it, and sure enough I do. However, something weird is happening. I seem to be more noticed by women now these days, even though I'm actually not trying to be noticed at the moment. Maybe there is the air of a man who has been laid recently or not, I don't know, but I'm getting more looks than ever from women - even much older than myself. Even those who are with their boyfriends, who gave me a few dirty looks too . I'm not even at my best physically (yet) so it's funny to me that I got all this attention even up to today when I was shopping earlier. Is all it takes one mutual sexual encounter to have a boost so significant that women can't help but notice you?? Or is it that I have actually become even more confident in myself since the incident and not completely been conscious of the change? They maybe capable of "smelling" confidence at least subconsciously, you never know. You probably also got a boost of confidence from your encounter, but idk. As for myself I have never had sex and probably never will (I maybe a horny man (damn you hormones) but I'm okay with this its not like its important) but I have noticed no matter how I feel women never feel attracted to me even when I'm feeling my best. I guess I'm just too wierd and socially inept or they can smell my virginity:lmao:. While this is only half-related this reminds me of a manga I read normally I don't read "girly" mangas but this one was too funny man , for some reason I can't remember the name but it was about this nerdy shy girl who is desperate for a boyfriend. But one funny scene that really had me laughing is when she finds out about pheromones and reasons that maybe if she doesn't shower for a day or so and masturbate all night (it doesn't actually show her doing that, its not supposed to be porn) her natural "woman scent" will become stronger and guys will find her irresistible, needless to say it doesn't work but she was confident that whole day, though for some reason. I couldn't stop laughing, wow I'm glad I wasn't in a library reading that:lmao:. Edited August 9, 2012 by Necris
USMCHokie Posted August 9, 2012 Posted August 9, 2012 Yep, I agree with Castle and Vintage...it's not that anyone else is doing anything differently...it's that your awareness and interpretation of others is changing...and it really does go back to external validation...it changes how you interpret how others view you...and it's vital to that pesky thing we call "confidence"... Had you not gotten yours last week, it would have probably been business as usual, but you wouldn't have "noticed" that you were getting noticed, and this thread probably would have never existed... 1
It's Just Me Posted August 9, 2012 Posted August 9, 2012 Had you not gotten yours last week, it would have probably been business as usual, but you wouldn't have "noticed" that you were getting noticed, and this thread probably would have never existed... Well, he might have noticed that he was getting noticed, but the voice in his head might have been different. "Crap, they can tell I'm a virgin! Stop staring at me!" or "I'm such a loser, no wonder they're staring at me." Not saying that's his voice (or ever has been), but we all interpret outside things differently at different times in our lives. Case in point: About a year ago, I was feeling a bit down and a bit chunky one morning (PMS). Head to the elevator to go down to my car and go to work, wearing one of my snug, stretch business shirts. A neighbour I know very well joins me (he's about 62, and his wife is a peach). While usually friendly, that morning he wasn't making eye contact and avoiding conversation. I was a bit taken aback, but thought I was maybe giving off negative vibes (first thought) or he was having a bad day (second thought). Get to my car in the underground parking, look down at my keys, and notice that the button that was holding my shirt together at boob level had come undone, probably when I slung my purse over my shoulder while waiting for the elevator! Hooters were hooting massively all over the place, with a lace bra singing harmony! I was mortified when I realized that this was likely the reason why Bob had been acting so funny in the elevator. I still cringe when I think of that morning. OMG.
2sure Posted August 9, 2012 Posted August 9, 2012 We all get a confidence boost when we get validation...like from sex, a job promotion, etc. When we feel better about ourselves, we are more attractive to the opposite sex. I'm positive I look great after I've had sex.
Author ThaWholigan Posted August 9, 2012 Author Posted August 9, 2012 Yep, I agree with Castle and Vintage...it's not that anyone else is doing anything differently...it's that your awareness and interpretation of others is changing...and it really does go back to external validation...it changes how you interpret how others view you...and it's vital to that pesky thing we call "confidence"... Had you not gotten yours last week, it would have probably been business as usual, but you wouldn't have "noticed" that you were getting noticed, and this thread probably would have never existed... It's funny The first thing I thought of when I was writing this thread was "external validation" 2
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