Is this the origin of "Let's just be friends?"

[poetic]

I just read the poem "No Thank You John" by Christina Rossetti from 1862, and I was surprised how modern it sounds.

 

"I never said I loved you, John:

Why will you tease me day by day,

And wax a weariness to think upon

With always "do" and "pray"?

 

You Know I never loved you, John;

No fault of mine made me your toast:

Why will you haunt me with a face as wan

As shows an hour-old ghost?

 

I dare say Meg or Moll would take

Pity upon you, if you'd ask:

And pray don't remain single for my sake

Who can't perform the task.

 

I have no heart?-Perhaps I have not;

But then you're mad to take offence

That don't give you what I have not got:

Use your common sense.

 

Let bygones be bygones:

Don't call me false, who owed not to be true:

I'd rather answer "No" to fifty Johns

Than answer "Yes" to you.

 

Let's mar our plesant days no more,

Song-birds of passage, days of youth:

Catch at today, forget the days before:

I'll wink at your untruth.

 

Let us strike hands as hearty friends;

No more, no less; and friendship's good:

Only don't keep in veiw ulterior ends, And points not understood

 

In open treaty. Rise above

Quibbles and shuffling off and on:

Here's friendship for you if you like; but love,-

No, thank you, John. "

 

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What I really love about this poem is how refreshingly direct and honest the writer is when it comes to the rejection. She is making it clear in no uncertain terms that she is rejecting John.

 

However, and this is the part that I'm confused the most about....why on earth did she add the "Let's just be friends" bit at the end?

 

 

 

The reason I'm confused is that many people seem to be interpeting this poem as a tactful rejection. I don't really see it as tactful. I see it as direct and honest. She has no intention of stringing John along becasue she rejects him in no uncertain terms. She even insults the guy throughout the poem in cleverly worded language.

 

but then why spoil the clarity by adding the "let's just be friends at the end?"

 

 

Does she sincerely want to be a friend? It doesn't seem so based on how much she insulted the guy. or was that supposed to be understood as it is in the modern sense of the LJBF? Did LJBF = Never talk to me again you prick?

 

I'm confused. A wonderful, honest direct rejection, that turns into ahead scratcher by adding in the LJBF.

 

Any ideas here?

 

Of course the reason I'm asking is I've had my share of the Let's just be friends rejection, and I still don't think I fully understand what it means. a genuine reaching out for friendship and nothing more, or a carefully masked "get away from me" ?