Unplugged Posted August 8, 2012 Posted August 8, 2012 So me and him where having a conversation, yeah I know I shouldn't be talking to him cause it's better for me that way. But it's hard not to reply to him whenhe messages me. But anyways let me show you are conversation... Him: now you know how I feel. Me: and how do you feel ? Him: sad. Me: now you know how I've felt for a while. Him: why ? Me: lml, I was gamma write this big long paragraph about why... But it's pointless with you lml. Him: what's pointless ? Me: trying to explain to you why I'm hurt, cause it just goes in one ear and out the other. Him: just tell me. Me: I've told you so many times before, you should know. Him: well I don't know, but I do know how much I've ****ed up and how bad I've been to you in the past but let's just leave that in the past and start new. Now I'm all for starting new, but what I don't understand is how he expects me to forget all about the pain he put me through and pretend that nothing happen and then just be his new best friend. I'm sorry if this isn't normal, but how do you expect me to just forget ? Me:
Chi townD Posted August 8, 2012 Posted August 8, 2012 Well, now the ball is in your court. Do you want to start over with him or is the pain of the past too much? If you want to start over then YOU have to set up the terms and conditions. Like, "Okay, if we are to start over then there's some things that need to happen. We need to go to couples counciling. I need full transparency from you. We need to communicate better and intimacy will be on my time and when I feel comfortable to be with you affectionately. If you can't agree to these terms, then it's best that we just part ways and wish each other a good life." See what he has to say to that. If he's serious about getting back with you, then he'll agree and start to do the heavy lifting WITH YOU to put things back together. But remember, this is a partnership and if he has conditions and terms, you will have to see if you can agree with what he proposes.
flitzanu Posted August 8, 2012 Posted August 8, 2012 it's pretty easy to say things will change and be different. will it happen? nah, not likely. 1
Author Unplugged Posted August 8, 2012 Author Posted August 8, 2012 Exactly, and he's told this all before. what I have to say to fit is easier said then done...
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