Occu3.14'd Posted August 8, 2012 Posted August 8, 2012 When I think of the way our relationship started, it literally came down to a chance encounter on FB. If I had logged on a few minutes earlier/later, there's a very good chance that we never would have reconnected. Which means I wouldn't be going through this **** right now... But it also means I wouldn't have had all the wonderful parts of the relationship too. So while I know it doesn't change anything, I often wonder "what if?" If you had it to do all over, would you? 1
hinatticus Posted August 8, 2012 Posted August 8, 2012 Yup. Definitely. I'd tweak a few things, but I'd do it again. Heck, I'm trying to do it again!!
blue_jay_bird Posted August 8, 2012 Posted August 8, 2012 Yup. Definitely. I'd tweak a few things, but I'd do it again. Heck, I'm trying to do it again!! But it will still end the way it did. Think of the Pain.
veggirl Posted August 8, 2012 Posted August 8, 2012 Once you have moved on and are over your ex, you can honestly answer that question. Until then, you really can't. I have an ex I thought I would never get over. I remember throwing up and losing so much weight. I remember all the nights I cried myself to sleep and all the days I only made it to work cause I couldn't afford the apartment he left me in alone if I didn't go. I remember finding out he had a new girlfriend. I remember him changing his number so I wouldn't call. Would I "do it over"? No, I hope to never experience that pain again and am now completely uninterested in him. Do I wish it had never happened? Absolutely not! I learned what I can take, I learned that life goes on, I learned that I can love again. I learned how a relationship should not be, I learned that if it's so much work, it isn't right. I learned SO much about myself and relationships from that. Those lessons are priceless. 3
Pod81 Posted August 8, 2012 Posted August 8, 2012 Do I wish it had never happened? Absolutely not! I learned what I can take, I learned that life goes on, I learned that I can love again. I learned how a relationship should not be, I learned that if it's so much work, it isn't right. I learned SO much about myself and relationships from that. Those lessons are priceless. Completely agree with the above quote. If I had never been in my past relationship, I would probably still be in my naive little world with my immature thoughts about love and relationships. I truly feel like I've grown so much and I will take all I've learned into my next relationship.
hinatticus Posted August 8, 2012 Posted August 8, 2012 But it will still end the way it did. Think of the Pain. If I tweaked a few things we wouldn't be broken up. The pain I'm in now wouldn't exist! Seriously... No one has invented a time machine yet?!? We have an amazing 2 year old, so I would definitely do it again.
weallfalldown Posted August 8, 2012 Posted August 8, 2012 i wouldn't!!!!!!!!!!!! totaly regret it now
youdunsay Posted August 8, 2012 Posted August 8, 2012 I learnt from the other girl that if you want to get a guy you should add all if not most of his close friends before he even introduce to you. And make friends with his friends before you even meet them. And dress to your nines everyday lol. And make everyone around his circles feel that you have did a lot for him, like throwing surprises. You should plaster pictures of you and him all over FB so that he's being cornered and theres no way for him to say no to you. Will I do it over again? No I won't. If I can turn back the time I'll rather ignored him from the start. There's no future and I cannot accept that in the relationship. Now girls will you do th3 above? Guys will you take that?
chrisusarmy2005 Posted August 8, 2012 Posted August 8, 2012 I know a lot of people wouldn't redo it but I totally would. I may be broken up with her now we had a good 4 yrs and I wanted to marry her. I would change some things but I believe she is totally worth it. She dropped me like a rock but through all the hurt and everything else. I still love her. She is probably the first one I can see spending my life with. If she didn't meet this guy from work, Id be fine now. As much as I can be over with her,shes worth it. I would take a bullet for her and help her through everything like I did. In a way I hope she wakes up and gets back with me when she realizes what she lost but it's her problem.
barese1 Posted August 8, 2012 Posted August 8, 2012 I agree with one of the above posts. Right now I wouldn't go near her simply because of all this pain. But once I feel over her I probably will look back at how great it was...if I ever feel over her!
Ruby65 Posted August 8, 2012 Posted August 8, 2012 I'm waaaaaay over my big breakup of 5 years ago.... and I'd NEVER choose to do it again! What a waste of time. I'm with someone now who's AMAZING. Who's better in every way and who doesn't put me through any of the stupid cr*p my ex did. Who the hell needs those lame old memories of a failed relationship with someone who was too stupid to appreciate me?? They don't compare to my PRESENT -- not by a mile. And that breakup nearly killed me!! 1
KatZee Posted August 8, 2012 Posted August 8, 2012 I totally would do it over. I would have made him wait months before officially dating me. I would have completely made sure he was over his ex. I would have listened to my gut when it was telling me things were off. I would have never let him get away with the things he pulled with me. I would have walked the second I found out he cheated. 1
youdunsay Posted August 8, 2012 Posted August 8, 2012 I would have walked the second I found out he cheated. Nice. same sentiments.
YorickBrown Posted August 9, 2012 Posted August 9, 2012 When I think of the way our relationship started, it literally came down to a chance encounter on FB. If I had logged on a few minutes earlier/later, there's a very good chance that we never would have reconnected. Which means I wouldn't be going through this **** right now... But it also means I wouldn't have had all the wonderful parts of the relationship too. So while I know it doesn't change anything, I often wonder "what if?" If you had it to do all over, would you? Excellent question "Occupied" It deserves a reply...and not just a quick one. I actually had to think about it to be honest. So your question really is: Even if knowing that a relationship would the ex would/could end in heartache and pain....would you still do it? That's the question right? The most honest (and I know, perhaps stupid) answer my gut is telling me is a "Yes". It would have been a lot simpler to just say "No, of course not" or "Never again" and proceed to get into the nasty details but I dont really know why it's still gonna be a Yes...I keep getting an image of a "moth flying around and getting drawn into a flame" Does it make sense? The only explanation I can come up, aside of course from "well, I still had fun" or "well, I wasn't gonna learn anything if I didn't try" etc....is that...as weird and "untrue" as this may sound, "I didn't really have no choice" I got caught in the moment:love:, and the while I knew it was just a matter of time before I get burned... I can't help it, I had to see it through and let it run its course....does anyone else feel this way? 1
Author Occu3.14'd Posted August 9, 2012 Author Posted August 9, 2012 When I proposed the question, my intent was that you could not change anything. Right now, knowing full well how terrible I feel, I would do it over in a second. This is the first woman I've ever loved, and I wouldn't want that to pass me by. Of course, this may be influenced by the fact that I'd give anything to go back to the way things were, if only for a short time. She literally made me happier than I''ve ever been in my life. And then one day, with absolutely no warning at all, she destroyed me. Sick though, isn't it? That I wouldn't hesitate to go through it again?
weallfalldown Posted August 9, 2012 Posted August 9, 2012 When I proposed the question, my intent was that you could not change anything. Right now, knowing full well how terrible I feel, I would do it over in a second. This is the first woman I've ever loved, and I wouldn't want that to pass me by. Of course, this may be influenced by the fact that I'd give anything to go back to the way things were, if only for a short time. She literally made me happier than I''ve ever been in my life. And then one day, with absolutely no warning at all, she destroyed me. Sick though, isn't it? That I wouldn't hesitate to go through it again? yea but would you mate/........i doubt it after a while, you'd prob never look at her in the same way again...
YorickBrown Posted August 9, 2012 Posted August 9, 2012 When I proposed the question' date=' my intent was that you could not change anything.[/b'] Right now, knowing full well how terrible I feel, I would do it over in a second. This is the first woman I've ever loved, and I wouldn't want that to pass me by. Of course, this may be influenced by the fact that I'd give anything to go back to the way things were, if only for a short time. She literally made me happier than I''ve ever been in my life. And then one day, with absolutely no warning at all, she destroyed me. Sick though, isn't it? That I wouldn't hesitate to go through it again? It's not really that sick dude...I mean, it sounds illogical but like I said (in so many words in my last reply), I can relate to what your saying. Of course, there is really no going back and even if we were able to...we would still allow the exact same thing to happen right? Even knowing fully well that its eventually gonna "destroy" us...We'll always think that we could somehow "pull it off" and make things better...This feeds us believe to stay and do it over and over...and f*cks us up over and over too... "Quod me nutriet, me destruit" PS: Darn it, now you got me doing Latin
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