Axton Posted August 7, 2012 Posted August 7, 2012 So, seeing as this is my first thread here, I decided to do a cursory search for a thread on overthink. Finding none (unless my search skills really aren't so great), I figured I'd make one. Its a dangerous trap to fall in, isn't it? It clouds your reasoning, judgement and emotions. So why not start with my story, of which I can assure you, I'll make as direct and brief as possible. 30 years old, Single now for close to 3 years. Before that, was in a very long relationship that ended quite poorly. It took well over a year to recover from. While I dated in that time, I was nowhere near emotionally available.Started dating as an emotionally viable candidate after that time passed, found lots of emotionally unstable women or women that just didn't bring that passion out in me. So I started worrying that passion was no longer part of me, I'd lost it with bitterness and age. Fast forward to now; Saw a woman at a friends party who I used to work with. We spent most of the night together. I added her on FB because I told her about a band, so I sent her a link.Asked her out for dinner, date went incredible. Almost got kicked out of the restaurant then sat in my car and talked for a few more hours.We dated a few more times since then, its been about 3 weeks now, she introduces me to friends, is generally excited when I ask her out and replies "yes" right away, no "uhmmm, well, maybe" responses.She is very affectionate, takes my hand, nuzzles in to my neck, kisses, even in public or around friends.I'm extremely passionate with her. The way I kiss her, hold her, dates I plan, etc. She's commented on how much she appreciates it. At a concert, someone even though were were on MDMA. So now, the problem areas that I hope you all could shed light on. She's in her early twenties. While I know women like older, more mature men, I'm concerned that while my ideal result would be a relationship, it might not be hers.Because of her field of work/study, she has befriended many male friends. She has introduced me to many of them. I have a few close friends who are girls, so I realize how hypocritical it seems. I don't mean to give the impression that its a deal breaker or that I want her to not see them, I want to know how to be ok with it. I'm generally not a jealous person, though.Since I haven't felt this strongly about a woman in years, the last time I had these "New Girl Jitters' was almost 11 years ago. I don't know how to handle them. If we don't talk as much as we did the previous day, I worry she's losing interest, all the typical overthink drama. I don't show her how nervous I am at all, and even though I feel like texting her, I hold back because I respect that she has an active life outside of me. So, I'm its normal to wait for a new text, or reply right away, that these tendencies come with the territory. Is it though? Do you think she's reacting the same way? How do you guys handle it? Thanks in advance! I hope this thread could be fruitful to others as well.
durentu Posted August 7, 2012 Posted August 7, 2012 You're the man. Gotta lay it down on the table. "I'm starting to develop some strong feelings for you. I care about you. I'd rather have you in my life right now, than not. If you say no, I'll understand and no hard feelings. Let me know" something like that good luck!
Recommended Posts