roshni.agarwal Posted August 7, 2012 Posted August 7, 2012 Hi friends i have posted my problem before also and i got satisfied solution for that.. but now again i am in a problem so i want you all to help me to come out of this problem. I am paraplegic girl of 26 years old, i love a guy who proposed me first, promised lot of things and then left me in a middle of nowhere.. he told he loves me and because of his family members he didnt accept me. then for a couples of time he came back and i accepted him again. but when the last time he broke up with me it hurt me lot and i decided to delete him from facebook and there was NC between us but again then he messaged me in my phone when he came to knew that someone in my family was not well... its all long distance relationship.. then there was couple of text we sent each other.. he started reminding me everything we had before and like that before, i was clear to him that i wont come back and i lied that i love someone else which he knew that i was simply lying, then one fine day again i accepted that i love him now also and missed him a lot, this just happened within the fifteen days we started talking again. then again we have romantic close talks and after that he told me he wants me to be his friends coz anyhow his family members wont accept me. i dont know what happened to me i started crying over the phone asking that are you leaving me again? and at the same time he also started cry saying i wont leave you, i wont leave you. then we said gud night that's it then after that night he started sending me friendship message and not talking on text anymore, I asked him what happen? he replied nothing happen, again and again he sending me forwarded message reminding me as if we are friends and nothing else.. i sent him some cards on courier he text me after getting it he likes it .. i said ok then he didnt reply! i feel lost again, i am thinking what mistake i have done that he is leaving me again and again. sometimes i feel he love me but when he starts avoiding me i feel like as he never loved me. I am crying almost every night and i feel i dont want this life because if i was normal girl not disabled then i could have get my true love, I love him more and i know i cant forget him but i feel i cant be his friends as he asked me for friendship now because i love him... what should i do? please help me!!
Chi townD Posted August 7, 2012 Posted August 7, 2012 Did you get into a loving and caring relationship with him for the end result being nothing more than "really good friends"? I don't think so. Look, it hurts and we get that. Hell, we've all been there. But, right now, if you agree to be his friend, all you're doing is filling an emotional need for him until someone else comes along to fill that role. Then, you're going to get kicked to the curb and then you're REALLY going to be a mess because you were clinging on to false hope. You deserve better. You deserve a guy at is going to want to be with you heart, body and soul because he can't bare the thought of being away from you for too long. A guy that is going to make it his goal in life to at least make you smile everyday. A guy that will send you flowers at your work with a note that says, "Just because it's thursday." A guy that will make you laugh at some of the boyish things he does. A guy that won't put you on a pedistal, but would rather have you as an equal and a partner in life; so the two of you can take on the world together. A guy you can find solace with when your sad. A guy that you be proud of an accomplishments and goals that you achieve for yourself and will be supportive along the way. A guy that will listen to you when you're upset and will keep you at even keel when you're out of line. He will balance you out. A guy that will try and cook you a romantic dinner for the two of you and the food sucks because he can't cook, but you smile because at least he tried it for you. Your Ex isn't it. He isn't up for the task. I guarantee you that, in this world somewhere, there is a guy that is will to give you everything I described in the paragraph above AND MORE! And he's out there looking for you. But, he's never going to find you if you're hung up on a guy that refuses to commit. 1
Author roshni.agarwal Posted August 7, 2012 Author Posted August 7, 2012 Did you get into a loving and caring relationship with him for the end result being nothing more than "really good friends"? I don't think so. Look, it hurts and we get that. Hell, we've all been there. But, right now, if you agree to be his friend, all you're doing is filling an emotional need for him until someone else comes along to fill that role. Then, you're going to get kicked to the curb and then you're REALLY going to be a mess because you were clinging on to false hope. You deserve better. You deserve a guy at is going to want to be with you heart, body and soul because he can't bare the thought of being away from you for too long. A guy that is going to make it his goal in life to at least make you smile everyday. A guy that will send you flowers at your work with a note that says, "Just because it's thursday." A guy that will make you laugh at some of the boyish things he does. A guy that won't put you on a pedistal, but would rather have you as an equal and a partner in life; so the two of you can take on the world together. A guy you can find solace with when your sad. A guy that you be proud of an accomplishments and goals that you achieve for yourself and will be supportive along the way. A guy that will listen to you when you're upset and will keep you at even keel when you're out of line. He will balance you out. A guy that will try and cook you a romantic dinner for the two of you and the food sucks because he can't cook, but you smile because at least he tried it for you. Your Ex isn't it. He isn't up for the task. I guarantee you that, in this world somewhere, there is a guy that is will to give you everything I described in the paragraph above AND MORE! And he's out there looking for you. But, he's never going to find you if you're hung up on a guy that refuses to commit. ya you are right and your type of guy making me miss him more because i have expected from him a lot and got nothing, i dont feel like talking to any other boys, all the time am thinking about him only and waiting for him to come back.. but at the end as you have said i will get nothing but rejection again.
Mike_d Posted August 7, 2012 Posted August 7, 2012 i dont feel like talking to any other boys, all the time am thinking about him only and waiting for him to come back.. but at the end as you have said i will get nothing but rejection again. maybe work on talking to men next time, and leave the boys to the little girls. hang around here, and keep talking, it helps. we're all hurting somehow in pretty much in the same boat, cmon aboard.
Chi townD Posted August 7, 2012 Posted August 7, 2012 I promise you that guy is out there. Look, you said that you're a paraplegic girl. I've worked with a lot of folks that had a disability. The funny thing is, some people call folks with a disability "special people". At first, I was offended that they would call them "special people" rather than just "people". But, the more I thought about it, the more I understood that they are ABSOLUTELY RIGHT! People with disabilities are "special people". They're not special BECAUSE they have a disability, They are special because of their ability to OVERCOME their disability and function no differently from anyone else. THAT'S what makes them special!! Therefore, I KNOW that you are a strong,brave and independant girl that has the ability to face the world head on. So, right now, your heart is broken and that's a pain we're all familar with. But, I know that you have the power and the will to overcome this and find that person in you that has the ability and the RIGHT to be loved in the way that you deserve! You need time to heal from this. Don't worry about being interested in other boys right now. That will come in time. But, for the time being. ENJOY LIFE!!! Go out into the world and see it! Take a trip somewhere. Time to move on, there's 7 billion people in the world! Go meet them! And who knows! You'll probably find your Prince Charming when you least expect it! 1
Author roshni.agarwal Posted August 7, 2012 Author Posted August 7, 2012 , maybe work on talking to men next time, and leave the boys to the little girls. hang around here, and keep talking, it helps. we're all hurting somehow in pretty much in the same boat, cmon aboard. Thanks.. can you please tell me one thing should i reply to him forwarded friendship messages? i am not doing that but i am missing him more
Author roshni.agarwal Posted August 7, 2012 Author Posted August 7, 2012 I promise you that guy is out there. Look, you said that you're a paraplegic girl. I've worked with a lot of folks that had a disability. The funny thing is, some people call folks with a disability "special people". At first, I was offended that they would call them "special people" rather than just "people". But, the more I thought about it, the more I understood that they are ABSOLUTELY RIGHT! People with disabilities are "special people". They're not special BECAUSE they have a disability, They are special because of their ability to OVERCOME their disability and function no differently from anyone else. THAT'S what makes them special!! Therefore, I KNOW that you are a strong,brave and independant girl that has the ability to face the world head on. So, right now, your heart is broken and that's a pain we're all familar with. But, I know that you have the power and the will to overcome this and find that person in you that has the ability and the RIGHT to be loved in the way that you deserve! You need time to heal from this. Don't worry about being interested in other boys right now. That will come in time. But, for the time being. ENJOY LIFE!!! Go out into the world and see it! Take a trip somewhere. Time to move on, there's 7 billion people in the world! Go meet them! And who knows! You'll probably find your Prince Charming when you least expect it! i have had heartbroken before also , so this time when he came he knew everything about my disability part because he is working there only where my treatment was going on, so i thought he know everything about me and when he waited for my yes for two months, but then he just left. i thought he knows everything life styles of people with disability so hw wont leave me alone.. but now.. i know he loves me but he is just not commiting himself and this is what making me feel more worse
Author roshni.agarwal Posted August 12, 2012 Author Posted August 12, 2012 this is going to be worse day by day.. I am again in NC and he doesnt bother .. he sent me friendship message for couple of days for which i didnt reply. now from the two days he is not sending me any message.. i am feeling very bad. All day i am thinking why he came back and again he left me. sometimes i feel to call him and to ask him as what happened why again he came and again leaving me. he told me the same reason that his family members wont accept me because of my disability but last time we talked he was crying over the phone and he told me he wont leave me ever thats why he want friendship but i never replied any of his friendship message and now he stop messaging .. i am feeling very sad.. please help me what should i do? this NC making me mad
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