Should I tell about Quarter-life crisis

[paras1te]

Hey,

 

Do my ex broke up wit me she wants to make more of her own decisions and such.

I know she still loves me very much and is broken about the break up, maybe even more then I am. But I still want her back at sometime. Now for my two questions.

 

I know that she's going trough a quarter-life crisis. Should I make her aware of this?

And should I go dating other girls etc (when the time is there) will this spark jealousy or destroy my chances?

I know when I dated a girl during our breakup 2 years ago she dated a guy as well because she was so hurt and lost. So defenitly don't want that. But she changed allot and I think she might not do that again.

 

Thanks in advance

[ihateslowjams]

Hey,

 

Do my ex broke up wit me she wants to make more of her own decisions and such.

I know she still loves me very much and is broken about the break up, maybe even more then I am. But I still want her back at sometime. Now for my two questions.

 

I know that she's going trough a quarter-life crisis. Should I make her aware of this?

And should I go dating other girls etc (when the time is there) will this spark jealousy or destroy my chances?

I know when I dated a girl during our breakup 2 years ago she dated a guy as well because she was so hurt and lost. So defenitly don't want that. But she changed allot and I think she might not do that again.

 

Thanks in advance

 

If you tell her what you think she's going through, she'll deny and argue with you. There is no point to tell her what she is going through because she'll never believe you. What you should do instead is to let her go instead of trying to convince her to stay when she WANTS to leave the relationship.

 

As for the question about if you should date other girls or not because it might affect your chances with her, you should take some time to yourself because you'll still be going through to grieving process. Dating other girls just to make he jealous is a very stupid idea. You should date others when you are ready to date other girls.

 

Again, I advise you to let her go. There is nothing you can do to change her mind about becoming an individual and wanting to make her own decisions. Everyone goes through this process and they're trying to prove to themselves that they can live life on their own.

 

Let her be and start focusing on yourself and your future. Maybe one day, she'll come back or maybe not. Who knows? All you have control of is yourself and your own happiness. Letting her go at this point with pride and dignity is the best option for you at the moment in my opinion.

[paras1te]

Thanks.

I don't think she will argue with me 'cause she's also sad that she feels this way right now. And admits that it's not desirable. So maybe it will make her better understand that she's not the only one going trough this desire of seeing if she can do things on her own.

[flitzanu]

Thanks.

I don't think she will argue with me 'cause she's also sad that she feels this way right now. And admits that it's not desirable. So maybe it will make her better understand that she's not the only one going trough this desire of seeing if she can do things on her own.

 

she wants to make more decisions on her own = i want to continue life without you.

 

 

she's not dumping you because she's afraid of feelings, she's breaking up with you because she doesnt' want to be with you.

[paras1te]

Hey there any more opinions ?

I still want to know whether I should tell her about gigs.

Maybe she will better understand and think oh.. so thats what I'm going trough.

And then make the process faster or so.

[Crila16]

What??? Quarter of a life crisis???? What are you talking about? There is no quarter of a life crisis. That would mean she's 25. If you say anything to her about it, she'll laugh in your face. That's not why she broke up with you. If she ended it with you, then how can you dating other girls ruin your chance with her? It's over. She chose not to be with you, so you now need to choose to move on and meet someone else.

 

Stop worrying about her and if she'll be jealous if you date. Worry about you. You're being weak. Stop putting her feelings first, she's not putting your feelings first. She's moving on with her life.

 

Also, I'm so sorry to say this, but she broke up with you because she just plain old didn't want to be with you, for whatever her reasons are. If anyone should have regrets if you move on, it will be her kicking herself for being a fool.

[I'm nuts]

What??? Quarter of a life crisis???? What are you talking about? There is no quarter of a life crisis. That would mean she's 25.

 

True, life is one big crisis, from the moment you're born, life throws certain certainties, lots of tax and heartbreaks

[Car10e]

I think even if you did tell her that she would get mad at you. If you don't feel ready to date, don't do it. Don't date a girl with the purpose of making your ex gf jealous, because it makes you look like a jerk for using someone.

[flitzanu]

Hey there any more opinions ?

I still want to know whether I should tell her about gigs.

Maybe she will better understand and think oh.. so thats what I'm going trough.

And then make the process faster or so.

 

as stated by everyone, NO, you shouldn't tell her. or do tell her. tell her that this idea of "GIGS" on a website forum is the reason she left you and that she's out of her mind.

 

is that going to work?

[Crila16]

Paras1te...I'm sorry to say this, but the girl doesn't have GIGS...or isn't going through a midlife crisis. She's just plain old not interested in dating you anymore. You're trying to find a reason and you're thinking that maybe she's going through a psychological something for the reason she's ending it...but she's ending it, because she's just not interested in dating you anymore. It's really that simple.

 

My boyfriend of 6 years overanalyzed me and went to psychics and talked to therapists, trying to figure out what was wrong with me that I was ending it. He came up with, I was a committment phobic and that maybe I was scared to allow myself to feel the love he wanted to give me. I got so annoyed and angry that he wasted time trying to psycho-analyze me that I finally just came out and told him, "I just wasn't in love with him anymore and I wanted to date someone else." End of story.

 

When someone ends it with you, it's because they don't want to be with you. Whatever their reasons are, it's usually because they're just not in love with you anymore. It's a hard pill to swallow, it sucks...but it's the truth. It's just a matter of accepting it.