Are there any winners in the gender wars?

[Pyro]

Sounds to me like this gender war is an online thing only.

 

That is a very healthy thing to do...letting online crap effect you in real life away from the internet.

[TaraMaiden]

....

For the record I am not invested in the idea of igniting a gender war. I would love nothing more than for it to end.

 

Gender wars my arse.

 

I don't discriminate.

 

I f.u.c.king hate everybody.

 

:laugh:

[Woggle]

I agree that divorce is less stigmatized but when you see these old couples who still genuinely love each other I bet you will see a whole lot less of that when my generation is that age.

 

Just listen to the music and watch the movies these days. Hardly any of it deals with romantic love anymore except for heartbreak sometimes and Mme Chauncer even agreed with me on that last week when she liked a comment where I said just that.

[Pyro]

Just listen to the music and watch the movies these days. Hardly any of it deals with romantic love anymore except for heartbreak sometimes and Mme Chauncer even agreed with me on that last week when she liked a comment where I said just that.

 

Because it sells and makes those people rich.

[Woggle]

Because it sells and makes those people rich.

 

Yes but why does it appeal to people?

[dreamingoftigers]

I agree that divorce is less stigmatized but when you see these old couples who still genuinely love each other I bet you will see a whole lot less of that when my generation is that age.

 

Just listen to the music and watch the movies these days. Hardly any of it deals with romantic love anymore except for heartbreak sometimes and Mme Chauncer even agreed with me on that last week when she liked a comment where I said just that.

 

Of course there will be fewer couples like that because media like the so-called "gender wars" etc. Affect people into believing "oh crap, she's acting like a bitch just like media tells me a woman will act online." when really it's because she's sick of having to answer for what stupid people did on the Internet.

 

People are led to believe in media today that having a committed relationship really means that you are depriving yourself of a plethora of sexual options. That's all. Why should I tie myself down to one irrational person of the opposite sex when I can have sex with dozens and deal with no baggage (except for the baggage I create for myself and potential future family). How are marriages and relationships supposed to flourish in that environment?

 

Simply by shutting off the noise, taking the "risk" of loving someone and being loved and having more balls than the rest of society and their insecurities. It makes you stand out to do so as well.

[dreamingoftigers]

Yes but why does it appeal to people?

 

Um, wouldn't you be the best qualified to answer that question?

 

Isn't it because it makes you feel in control in some way, like you see "the truth" behind "women?"

 

It makes sure that you aren't completely vulnerable to their vile romantic machinations and then you are safe on some level. You dint have to fully commit. And then that makes you depressed as Hell because you are alone?

[Woggle]

Of course there will be fewer couples like that because media like the so-called "gender wars" etc. Affect people into believing "oh crap, she's acting like a bitch just like media tells me a woman will act online." when really it's because she's sick of having to answer for what stupid people did on the Internet.

 

People are led to believe in media today that having a committed relationship really means that you are depriving yourself of a plethora of sexual options. That's all. Why should I tie myself down to one irrational person of the opposite sex when I can have sex with dozens and deal with no baggage (except for the baggage I create for myself and potential future family). How are marriages and relationships supposed to flourish in that environment?

 

Simply by shutting off the noise, taking the "risk" of loving someone and being loved and having more balls than the rest of society and their insecurities. It makes you stand out to do so as well.

 

You just sort of proved my point. The gender wars do exist and the media promotes it. Your post says the same thing I have been saying.

 

As for the music I can't stand today's music either.

[oaks]

By gender wars I mean the serious bitterness between men and women these days. If people think that gender relations are good they have their head in the sand.

 

For the record I am not invested in the idea of igniting a gender war. I would love nothing more than for it to end.

 

To your first point, it isn't all pervasive. Some people are bitter- but we're not all like you.

 

To your last point - BS. You come here starting threads like this! Nice try, but very transparent.

[Pyro]

Yes but why does it appeal to people?

 

People like drama......as long as they are viewing it from the side and its not happening to them.

 

To your first point, it isn't all pervasive. Some people are bitter- but we're not all like you.

 

To your last point - BS. You come here starting threads like this! Nice try, but very transparent.

 

Yes

[Woggle]

I created threads like this because I look for answers. I didn't say anything hateful in this one.

[dreamingoftigers]

You just sort of proved my point. The gender wars do exist and the media promotes it. Your post says the same thing I have been saying.

 

As for the music I can't stand today's music either.

 

:facepalm: of course they exists in the sense that there is propaganda surrounding the concept that people buy into.

 

It's a "fake" war constructed as surely and as seriously as Coke vs. Pepsi. An advertising campaign. But no "real" war. The coke factory is not going to nuke the Pepsi factory.

 

There is no inherently greater Cola, no matter how emotionally ridiculously people get involved about it sometimes.

 

The only people being harmed by that "war" ate the same people who buy into it as a cause and consume to much Cola on either side. But by all means they have the choice to drink Coke and/or Pepsi everyday.

 

I had an ex who was actually hooked (ridiculously) on Pepsi.

One day (bear in mind I was 17!) I got a bottle if coke and one of Pepsi. I switched the contents on them and gave him the "Pepsi" bottle. I thought he was going to notice right away and either get the joke or be pissy about it.

 

He didn't even notice. I thought because he drank it everyday that he would for sure notice, and he totally didn't.

 

I told him about halfway through and he totally lost it! Of course my switch-up wasn't nice but it was like he sold his grandmother to a terrorist cell or something.

 

99% of the population wouldn't get SO emotional about cola.

 

Similar numbers with "gender wars" even if 25% got really emotional about it, that means 75% really really aren't. We've got better stuff to do than try to promote and buy into hate in the Internet.

 

If you are looking for a reason to hate any group, you'll find it on the net for sure. Along with lots of ways to get your penis enlarged. (re: my spam folder).

[Woggle]

There isn't a war in the traditional sense but the way the media constantly pits men and women against each other is having a negative effect on relationships.

[dreamingoftigers]

There isn't a war in the traditional sense but the way the media constantly pits men and women against each other is having a negative effect on relationships.

 

If I relied on media and everyone else opinion as to who I could trust, I would have to live like a hermit.

 

I would believe that all men are wanna be rapists/killers/pump and dumpers. All black people were robbers and drug dealers. All Jews were cheap, con-artist types, all Christians were wacko, all Muslims were terrorists, any of my neighbors could be Communists coming to destroy my way of life and force me to be under a brutal dictatorship, all gays were trying to "convert me." that women were going to cause cat-fights and rip out chunks of my hair, that I had to pick between Coke and Pepsi and that old men, living alone that were nice to my kid were pedophiles looking for an opportunity. Not to drive if there's an Asian on the road, avoid those ganster Latinos, that my own church was trying to force me into a polygamous relationship, doctors are by far and large incompetent, food from restaurants is generally not safe, and all cops are just out to beat me up. That if I don't pick Pepsi, I will be doomed.

 

That's a lot of tired worrying for things that are most often not true and that I have little control over.

[Woggle]

You might be able to look past it but many do not. The constant men vs women stuff has created on atmosphere that does not promote loving relationships.

[dreamingoftigers]

There isn't a war in the traditional sense but the way the media constantly pits men and women against each other is having a negative effect on relationships.

 

The same way a Coke ad can convince you to overindulge IF you don't turn the NOISE OFF.

 

If you date or marry someone who buys into it, then yes you will be affected.

 

If you don't buy into it and marry someone who also doesn't buy into it, then it really doesn't affect your lives all that much.

 

Just like coke and Pepsi. My h and I don't really give too much of a crap either way. We rarely drink cola period. I don't even totally know if he has a preference. If made to choose, I'd choose Pepsi, but really it's all gross.

 

If h was an adamant Coke drinker, I wouldn't bother arguing back "no, Pepsi!"

I would probably be more like, "Hun, that's damned unhealthy and I'm worried as Hell you're going to die young because of damn Cola.

 

If he was a Pepsi drinker, same thing.

 

It doesn't matter so much the side your on as much as you are taking in toxic crap into your relationship. There's no way that having this much of a gender trigger can't be affecting your perception of your relationship, anymore than a crazy Coke drinker never sees his wife have it and wonders if she secretly drinks Pepsi.

 

It's nuts. And toxic.

[Woggle]

Soda is not such an emotionally driven topic as gender is.

[dreamingoftigers]

There isn't a war in the traditional sense but the way the media constantly pits men and women against each other is having a negative effect on relationships.

 

Coke and Pepsi have created ways to get more people access and hooked on their product. They have psychologists and neuro-scientists, market analysts etc etc etc to try to get YOU to drink their product.

 

I can't shut down Coke or Pepsi. Not even sure I'd want to focus my energy there. A lot of people cam have Coke or Pepsi occasionally without developing an obsession over it.

 

The only thing I can do is not drink pop as a whole because I know that j have a sugar problem. It's unfortunate when people go nuts over Coke or Pepsi but at the end if the day all I can choose for is myself.

 

I can ( if I put enough energy into it) be a healthy person and not partake in Coke or Pepsi. If enough people stop drinking it, than Coke and/or Pepsi would change the way that they do business. Consumer demands drive them, that's why they both try to repeatedly create consumer demand.

 

Xerox used to be a paper company exclusively. They weren't even called xerox. They put out one experimental photocopier and they outsold immediately because of the quality if their machine. They even changed their name and now everyone knows who they are.

 

Every time you click on your gender war crap, you provide demand for those who create those items. They aren't going to stop pushing the agenda if there's still a demand, so don't demand it.

 

Come on! This is basic supply and demand here.

 

You're American, you should be explaining this to me claiming my socialist healthcare is going to bankrupt us even though you guys pay 1.4 times the amount for your coverage (none of that due to Obamacare).

[dreamingoftigers]

Soda is not such an emotionally driven topic as gender is.

 

You never dated a Pepsi-nut.

 

Anyone can get obsessed with anything.

 

Politics

Gay marriage

Coke

Pepsi

Racism

Religious prejudice

Musical taste

Elitism of any kind.

 

You just have an unfortunate trauma trigger. It would be the same if your mother had been a crazy coke drinker and if you didn't have one at every sitting, you got walloped. Now every time you see a coke commercial, it's like you get walloped.

 

Gender might be more "personal" but it isn't any less triggering, and the example still stands for the affect and cycle.

[oaks]

I created threads like this because I look for answers. I didn't say anything hateful in this one.

 

Maybe not "hateful", but you're asserting that there's a gender war (in the topic) and that there's bitterness and animosity between men and women in general (in the first post). You're not exactly neutral in the whole 'gender wars' thing, and it's not the first thread you've started about this recently, either. I believe the other one included, in the first post, the following little gem:

 

I know I am starting another gender war thread

 

 

For someone who claims to be not invested in the idea of igniting a gender war you seem to do a pretty good job of doing exactly that!

 

By all means hold these views if you wish, but don't protest that you're not doing something that you plainly are.

[Woggle]

You can be in a war but still hate the war.

[Mme. Chaucer]

 

Just listen to the music and watch the movies these days. Hardly any of it deals with romantic love anymore except for heartbreak sometimes and Mme Chauncer even agreed with me on that last week when she liked a comment where I said just that.

 

I certainly did agree with you about feeling like you were born in the wrong era; I feel just like that myself.

 

I actually agree with you about quite a few things.

 

Feeling like we would have fit in better in a different time has nothing to do with persistently insisting that whatever you find on the Internet that confirms your desperate need to believe in "GENDER WARS" is the truth.

 

It's not the truth.

[Mme. Chaucer]

There isn't a war in the traditional sense but the way the media constantly pits men and women against each other is having a negative effect on relationships.

 

I don't even agree with you that the media "pits men and women against each other."

 

You certainly can find media that buys into all that if you look diligently enough, which seems to be your biggest pastime and even passion.

 

You, Woggle, also deliberately misconstrue and misrepresent what you read in order to promote your agenda of "GENDER WARS." For example, if some lowlife woman posts someplace that she cheated on her husband and it was awesome, and some other women say "you go girl," (just finding that crap is a full time job and quite a feat; I read a lot and rarely if ever come across it) this DOES NOT illustrate your favorite concept, "misandry."

[GorillaTheater]

It's not the truth.

 

The only place I see any evidence of the existence of such wars is on the internet. IRL I hear mostly good-natured grousing about the "other side". What's interesting to me is that, to the extent such a war actually exists, most of the combatants seem to be men. Not that there aren't exceptions. Some of the women (really, a handful) on LS have some nettlesome attitudes towards men, and I enjoy sticking forks in them as much as the next guy, but there are A LOT of men taking up rifles for the cause. And yes, I have a theory:

 

I firmly believe that people are tribal, and strongly suspect that men are more tribal than women.

 

When some men from the next village attack or otherwise seriously slight the neighboring village, those neighboring men get all riled up aginst the village as a whole, not just the perps. This goes a long ways towards explaining modern geopolitics.

 

And I think that same instinct kicks in for men who are hurt by women. Ire is directed not just towards the woman who hurt them, but against that whole damn vaginal tribe. In my worst moments, I've caught myself slipping into that kind of thinking as well. And although I'm not that reasonable as a rule, I'm rational enough to recognize that kind of thinking as the bullsh*t it is.

 

What the combatants don't realize is that all of their angst and bitterness hurts themselves far more than the "enemy".

[oaks]

You can be in a war but still hate the war.

 

You could unilaterally offer a ceasefire.