The Tallest One Posted August 3, 2012 Posted August 3, 2012 So ex dumped me almost six weeks ago, said she needed her time away from me. We have had minimal contact in first four weeks, now this past tuesday she texts me asking how i was doing and if it was ok to text me. We texted for about 45 minutes and at the end of it she said she would text me later and asked if that was ok. I said it was but i haven't heard from her since. I haven't texted her and don't plan on it. Was she just seeing if I was ok so she wouldn't feel so bad or guilty? She said she misses talking to me but why haven't I heard from her in almost three days? I guess in the bigger picture it doesn't matter what she says or does or doesn't do, she ended it, said the romantic part of our relationship was destroyed by all the issues we had dealt with over last ten months. So I've been busy with working fulltime, going to the gym, spending time with my youngest son, going to movies, out to dinner with family etc. But I still have a really hard time not thinking of her throughout the day and when I'm up at night. I don't sleep well, and in the mornings I feel very anxious and depressed. Just want so badly to feel happy again cause it's so lousy feeling lost, fearing I will be alone forever. Man this sucks for all of us, both males and females who are going through this. I know time heals, been here before a number of times, but every time it still hurts like never before!
Author The Tallest One Posted August 4, 2012 Author Posted August 4, 2012 So just as I finish this post, ex gf texts me saying hello how am I?
not-a-drive-by Posted August 4, 2012 Posted August 4, 2012 I hate these "how are you" texts from ex's. How do they expect us to respond? "I am doing great, thanks. And you?". They obviously know we are going through hell and to respond in any positive way is just a lie - unless you have truly moved on and content with your current life. Don't know whether it makes them feel better knowing that we are breaking down without them or what. But if my ex was to send that to me, I'd probably avoid answering that at all .
Author The Tallest One Posted August 5, 2012 Author Posted August 5, 2012 ....So when she texted me last Tuesday we text for about 45 minutes. She had a headache and wanted to rest a bit but said will text me later if that was ok, I said ok. Didn't hear from her again that day? Don't hear from her till Friday as I'm about to go to the gym. I didn't reply till I was finished at gym. She said sorry about not getting back Tuesday, fell asleep and woke up when her Mother came to her door with dinner! So why wait till Friday to explain? She wanted to know again how I was and told me she was going to Toronto with a girlfriend in a limo! That's nice to hear as I'm at home bored and feeling down! So don't hear from her yesterday at all until midnight when she texts "can't sleep, how about you?" I just ignored her and she didn't text anything else! So why does a woman who knows I was very much in love with her now treat me like a doormat? Only texting when she's bored or lonely? What do these women want other than to screw with our heads? I just plan on NC and hopefully she'll bugger off, otherwise I will have to tell her to not contact me!
sweetheart5381 Posted August 5, 2012 Posted August 5, 2012 ....So when she texted me last Tuesday we text for about 45 minutes. She had a headache and wanted to rest a bit but said will text me later if that was ok, I said ok. Didn't hear from her again that day? Don't hear from her till Friday as I'm about to go to the gym. I didn't reply till I was finished at gym. She said sorry about not getting back Tuesday, fell asleep and woke up when her Mother came to her door with dinner! So why wait till Friday to explain? She wanted to know again how I was and told me she was going to Toronto with a girlfriend in a limo! That's nice to hear as I'm at home bored and feeling down! So don't hear from her yesterday at all until midnight when she texts "can't sleep, how about you?" I just ignored her and she didn't text anything else! So why does a woman who knows I was very much in love with her now treat me like a doormat? Only texting when she's bored or lonely? What do these women want other than to screw with our heads? I just plan on NC and hopefully she'll bugger off, otherwise I will have to tell her to not contact me! Good plan. NC is the best route. And it's not just women that do this, men do it too. Mine came back just to keep me from seeing a man I am interested in. He waited til my new friend was on vacation then poured on his charm. Used all his old moves to lure me back. What a loser! They come back for selfish reasons.. to feed an ego, rid themselves of guilt, whatever... maybe the guy she left you for turned her down or dumped her. Either way, all that matters is getting the distance you need to feel whole again. Life will go on and be happier without her in the end. Don't respond to her crap, when it's done, it's done. The hurting does end... then you will wonder after the fact, "Wow, what the hell was so special about them anyway?!" Good luck. 1
broken-and-lost Posted August 5, 2012 Posted August 5, 2012 hey m8y my ex use to do this a lot at the start it's nothing more then a guilt thing hate to say it as everyone is different and i thought the same oh she regrets leaving but it's wasn't just a guilt check make sure your not off that bridge on a rope. soon as you reply and she gets the fix she's gone again and your left wondering waiting for the next one to feed off
Author The Tallest One Posted August 5, 2012 Author Posted August 5, 2012 Just to clarify, my ex didn't leave me for someone else, she left because the relationship was becoming to stressful on both of us and in the last couple of weeks of it, we would both end it only to return, but finally she put a final end to it for good. I know it sounds crazy, trust me, I've never been in a roller coaster relationship like this in my life.
Author The Tallest One Posted August 6, 2012 Author Posted August 6, 2012 Hduscio1989, at this point I have very little trust in her! She has been so up and down last ten months! I always wanted to work at the relationship but she never knows what she wants and she's so flakey! I miss her like crazy but am afraid of any false hope cause she's already broke my heart numerous times in the past! I just want to be in a happy healthy relationship where I feel loved and appreciated!
Author The Tallest One Posted August 6, 2012 Author Posted August 6, 2012 Hduscio, thanks for the reply, you have good advice and insight! It makes me sad because we hit it off like magic and now she'll text me every few days for who knows what reason? I like many find it a little hard to fill up my time that I used to spend with her! Hanging out with friends is good but I still think of her a lot and don't have a lot of genuine joy!
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