k100danny Posted August 3, 2012 Posted August 3, 2012 So the last week has been really hard on me and I feel that I'm more moving back than forward now. I'm on I think day 23 NC now and I seem to be missing my ex more. I did understand why we broke up and I wasn't always happy in the relationship, there were things I didn't like and things I found really hard to deal with and I felt I understood it quite well but this last week it seems any hard feeling or feelings like I was treat badly ect have faded and I'm missing her so much. I seem only to be remembering the good and even when i remember the bad it doesn't seem that bad, I thought with time that feelings would go the other way and although I never thought i would develop hard feelings i thought i would start to become indifferent towards her and it feels like its going totally the other way. I know I get anxiously attached and they say that dating or moving on and realising other people are out there is a way to disconnect from an ex for people like me but i've been on a couple of dates, kissed someone a few times and it seems I was just tryign to force myself. I know it can go nowhere with this girl an i'm glad I haven't slept with her. It just makes me realise she isn't my ex and however bad my ex was I would rather be here with her than anyone else right now ( well that;s not true i obviously mean i'd rather it was the way it was before, I couldn't be with her again now) It's just such an odd feeling, I feel like nobody will make me feel that way again and I don't think i will ever care about someone the way I did, wether it was the right kind of love for her I don't know But i do know I stood by her when it would have been easier to walk away, I would have done anything for her and When i saw her sad it ripped my heart out.
Appleness Posted August 3, 2012 Posted August 3, 2012 If you hurt that much, it may mean that you're starting to heal. Trust me, it's better to get the negative feelings out now bit by bit rather than have them hit you like a truck months down the road. You'll get through it. It's best to keep that in mind. For me, it was the worst at the 3 month mark because I gave myself an ultimatum to get over it and not b*tch about it at that point. The week right before that I went through hell. Sleepless nights, moody days at work, didn't want to eat, etc. But you know what's great about hitting rock bottom? You only have one direction to go: UP! Keep posting and keep your chin up. Heal your heart and don't ever doubt yourself.
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