What does this mean?

[lemonlime]

My ex and I have been broken up for a month now. We are trying to work through things though. We've been meeting up about once a week. Usually when we are together its just like when we were together. He just tries to show me he still loves me. It confusing, and I always leave feeling like if he really felt that way, then we would be together.

 

Logically I know that when I'm not there he's still angry and hurt about what happened (i lied to him about something for 4 months, not cheating). He says he doesnt want to seem angry and mean when we only get to see each other once a week. He's also started calling midway between seeing each other. He keeps saying he wants to try, and he wants to work things out. He just dont know if or when that will be.

 

Here is my main issue. I feel like im beginning to emotionally distance myself from this situation. I'm not sure why. I know I love him, and I know I would want to be with him if I could. I did come up with some theories though.

1. It could be that its like having a nerve exposed and over time it starts to loose feeling from hurting so much for too long.

2. It could be that I'm still upset because last Saturday I needed him (Got injured and we had a communication problem, so apparently he didnt realize how much I needed him there) and he didnt come.

3. When we did see each other on Monday, it was really awkward and uncomfortable, I was still really upset about Saturday, and some of the stuff he said made me realize that I may be too emotionally connected to him, and as the evening continued I realized that I didnt know if we would ever get back together

4. Like mentioned above, I feel much less confident about whats going to happen. I think this might be causing me to emotionally withdraw to protect myself. I also keep wondering how long Im supposed to stay in this place of limbo.

 

When I spoke to him tonight, I could just tell, there is a big disconnect occurring. I dont know how to fix it, or if I should even try.