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Posted

So i've only been dating this girl for a little short of a week, but we had been talking for about 2 months prior to that. I'm 21 and she's 19, she's also the slightly needy, likes feeling wanted-type.

 

Communication rates prior to dating were pretty constant. She called often, always texted first, kept the conversation going if I didn't reply within a few hours... Always wanted to skype, always said she missed me, etc. I'm sure you get the idea.

 

Just prior to dating we had a slight falling out, mostly just about pursuing a relationship. We both wanted one, the way the situation came about was the bad part though.. (i'll save an essay and just say it's no big deal). Just after, she said she was committed and didn't want to let a guy like me go. That day itself was like the prime example of constant communication, after all that went down we were on skype until like 5am, even though we had a day-long event the next day.

 

And then, at the end of that following day, we started dating. Ever since then, communication has seemed to decline. Maybe i'm just paranoid, so feel free to tell me that.. We do text throughout the day, but I find myself texting her first a lot more, even though say, the night before she fell asleep before replying to my last text. And with awesome iPhone technology, I'll see that she's actually read it at like 7-8am when waking up, but i'll have to start the new day's conversation hours later anyway. Occasionally i'll text her a second time, hours later.. She doesn't seem to call anywhere near as often, and I've been passed up on Skype lately by her best friend who just moved across the country.

 

On the other end, if she is texting me and I don't respond for a while she'll do the same thing.

 

Ah, well after typing all of this out, I think I kinda talked myself out of something being wrong.. But it just seems like new relationship = a really euphoric state of always wanting to be in contact. If anyone wants to offer some advice though, feel free :D

Posted

Maybe she thinks now that you are not just friends anymore but date, she has to play a little hard to get. It's funny how people react to changes in status sometimes.

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Posted
Maybe she thinks now that you are not just friends anymore but date, she has to play a little hard to get. It's funny how people react to changes in status sometimes.

 

Hmm, yeah I can see that. It definitely seems like all of this came directly in line with the "titles"..

 

On the other end of things though, I almost wonder if because we are actually together now, that she doesn't feel the need to try. I hate to say it or even let it cross my mind, but it's a thought.

 

I'd love to be able to just bring it up and let her know she seems distant, but this early on i'd rather just let things settle for a little while longer before I address anything.

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Posted

Yes she could be taking it for granted though it's too soon for that I would have thought.

 

I think give it a little while and have a chat

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Posted
Yes she could be taking it for granted though it's too soon for that I would have thought.

 

I think give it a little while and have a chat

 

 

Sounds good. Thank you!

Posted
Sounds good. Thank you!

 

Considering it was your own suggestion really in your previous post :laugh:

Posted

My take is she simply adjusted her communication style to fit yours.

She may have been tired of initiating, or after some reflection, felt a need to mellow out.

The change of relationship status likely helped the latter.

Whatever the reason, her actions don't strike me as game-playing or an indication of losing interest; they indicate a sort of healthy settling in.

Enjoy. :)

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Posted
My take is she simply adjusted her communication style to fit yours.

She may have been tired of initiating, or after some reflection, felt a need to mellow out.

The change of relationship status likely helped the latter.

Whatever the reason, her actions don't strike me as game-playing or an indication of losing interest; they indicate a sort of healthy settling in.

Enjoy. :)

 

I haven't looked at it that way before. I guess the status created a little bit of comfort that wasn't there before.

 

Thanks!

Posted

I take it she doesn't live close to you?

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Posted
I take it she doesn't live close to you?

 

Actually, she's around 15 minutes away. Hanging out hasn't been the easiest thing lately. She lives with her grandparents, and her mother is about to move halfway across the country, so the past week she's been helping her mom pack.

 

On top of that, even at her age, her parents are still very controlling. I know from an ex of hers, that she used to sneak out a lot at night to be able to see him. Hasn't happened for us yet though.

 

^That's a whole 'nother thread topic.. But when I can do whatever I want, outside the confines of work and school, her situation is pretty lame for us.

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