brahmabull117 Posted August 3, 2012 Posted August 3, 2012 Well, it certainly doesn't seem to be any different from a man who feigns "commitment" in order to get what he wants: sex. two wrongs don't make a right
miss_jaclynrae Posted August 3, 2012 Posted August 3, 2012 There are the double standards, as I said, I am fully aware that I am one of the crowned "hoes" around here.
Star Gazer Posted August 3, 2012 Posted August 3, 2012 Well, it certainly doesn't seem to be any different from a man who feigns "commitment" in order to get what he wants: sex. A movie date for fun with a casual friend who knows the deal on the one hand, and feigning commitment to get sex on the other hand, are night and day different. It's two consenting adults vs. outright manipulation. 1
USMCHokie Posted August 3, 2012 Posted August 3, 2012 two wongs don't make a white Sorry, I couldn't help myself...
Emilia Posted August 3, 2012 Posted August 3, 2012 Using is using and manipulating is manipulating. It is actually quite difficult to be a good manipulator, you have to put a fair amount of effort into it. I have no sympathy. 1
brahmabull117 Posted August 3, 2012 Posted August 3, 2012 A movie date for fun with a casual friend who knows the deal on the one hand Movie date for fun with a casual friend is same thing as getting into bed together, making out and cuddling and then telling him to stop once she's done receiving all the validation/attention she wanted? She's a user. Give me a break with that
Star Gazer Posted August 3, 2012 Posted August 3, 2012 Using is using and manipulating is manipulating. It is actually quite difficult to be a good manipulator, you have to put a fair amount of effort into it. I have no sympathy. When two people mutually use each other for the same purpose, is that really a bad thing? Is it as bad as when one person knowingly manipulates an innocent to get what he/she wants?
Star Gazer Posted August 3, 2012 Posted August 3, 2012 Movie date for fun with a casual friend is same thing as getting into bed together, making out and cuddling and then telling him to stop once she's done receiving all the validation/attention she wanted C'mon. The guys know the deal when they respond to the invitation. We're not talking about 28 year old virgins here.
brahmabull117 Posted August 3, 2012 Posted August 3, 2012 When two people mutually use each other for the same purpose, is that really a bad thing? Is it as bad as when one person knowingly manipulates an innocent to get what he/she wants? Same purpose? These men want sex/dating. Jacky wants attention/validation
brahmabull117 Posted August 3, 2012 Posted August 3, 2012 C'mon. The guys know the deal when they respond to the invitation. We're not talking about 28 year old virgins here. you're just trying to justify attention whore behavior Yes most of them know the deal but truthfully speaking, they're hoping that Jacky will change her mind and WILL sleep with them. No man wants to kiss/cuddle and not have sex, that's beyond asinine. I don't even know the word to use to properly describe how asinine that is It's a 50/50 thing - the men are responsible because they're idiots and pussies but Jacky should have the decency to not allow behavior like that
Author Eternal Sunshine Posted August 3, 2012 Author Posted August 3, 2012 Guys know the deal and are having just as much fun as we are It's a win/win
USMCHokie Posted August 3, 2012 Posted August 3, 2012 Same purpose? These men want sex/dating. We really don't know what these guys actually want and that seems to be the determinative factor in all of this nonsense.
brahmabull117 Posted August 3, 2012 Posted August 3, 2012 We really don't know what these guys actually want and that seems to be the determinative factor in all of this nonsense. I've never met a man in my life who has any interest in kissing/cuddling unless it's going to lead to sex. I'm willing to bet he doesn't exist (Unless he's terribly insecure about sex or something but certainly no normal man wants to makeout but not have sex) Give me a break man, you're supposed to be the logical one here Guys know the deal and are having just as much fun as we are It's a win/win Regular heterosexual guys have no interest in kissing/making out if it leads to no sex Were you and Jacky born on planet Jupiter? I don't understand how 2 fully grown women can be so incredibly ignorant about the nature of men. All you're doing is taking advantage and using these pathetic guys for your own attention/validation and not giving them what they want. How is that a win/win?
Emilia Posted August 3, 2012 Posted August 3, 2012 When two people mutually use each other for the same purpose, is that really a bad thing? Is it as bad as when one person knowingly manipulates an innocent to get what he/she wants? I think 50-50 rarely happens, I think often users attract those that are more vulnerable - that goes both for men and women. 1
miss_jaclynrae Posted August 3, 2012 Posted August 3, 2012 I've never met a man in my life who has any interest in kissing/cuddling unless it's going to lead to sex. I'm willing to bet he doesn't exist (Unless he's terribly insecure about sex or something but certainly no normal man wants to makeout but not have sex) Give me a break man, you're supposed to be the logical one here Regular heterosexual guys have no interest in kissing/making out if it leads to no sex Were you and Jacky born on planet Jupiter? I don't understand how 2 fully grown women can be so incredibly ignorant about the nature of men. All you're doing is taking advantage and using these pathetic guys for your own attention/validation and not giving them what they want. How is that a win/win? I am sorry to say this, but you are the LAST man I would ever listen to.
brahmabull117 Posted August 3, 2012 Posted August 3, 2012 I am sorry to say this, but you are the LAST man I would ever listen to. How about the 2 or 3 other guys and 2 or 3 other women in here who have all agreed with me? You're showing a very ugly side of your personality in this thread
USMCHokie Posted August 3, 2012 Posted August 3, 2012 I've never met a man in my life who has any interest in kissing/cuddling unless it's going to lead to sex. I'm willing to bet he doesn't exist (Unless he's terribly insecure about sex or something but certainly no normal man wants to makeout but not have sex) I can think of a few situations where it might be possible...though not probable... (1) He's gay, but not fully out of the closet...i.e., he'll kiss and cuddle but genital contact is yucky to him...? (2) He's actually in a relationship with someone else and defines cheating as sex, so in his mind, he'll get some strange without actually "cheating"...? (3) He's terribly insecure about himself and his chances with her, so he settles for their "friendship" with no eligibility for parole... So like I said, it's certainly possible, though not probable...
brahmabull117 Posted August 3, 2012 Posted August 3, 2012 So like I said, it's certainly possible, though not probable... Yea it's possible to win the lottery too. The chances are about 99.999% here that the guys want sex, so they are getting used
USMCHokie Posted August 3, 2012 Posted August 3, 2012 I think 50-50 rarely happens, I think often users attract those that are more vulnerable - that goes both for men and women. I would agree with this. However, my only minor objection is the use of the term "attract"...I see it more like the vulnerable being the only ones left when the dust settles. As we discussed earlier, a "real man" (or woman) would never allow himself to be placed in such a situation. Therefore, over time, the user would generally be left drowning in a sea of nothing but vulnerable individuals. 1
Emilia Posted August 3, 2012 Posted August 3, 2012 I would agree with this. However, my only minor objection is the use of the term "attract"...I see it more like the vulnerable being the only ones left when the dust settles. As we discussed earlier, a "real man" (or woman) would never allow himself to be placed in such a situation. Therefore, over time, the user would generally be left drowning in a sea of nothing but vulnerable individuals. Probably fair point. Most of us recognise this sort of thing as we mature so yes 1
mesmerized Posted August 3, 2012 Posted August 3, 2012 I've never met a man in my life who has any interest in kissing/cuddling unless it's going to lead to sex. I'm willing to bet he doesn't exist (Unless he's terribly insecure about sex or something but certainly no normal man wants to makeout but not have sex) Give me a break man, you're supposed to be the logical one here Regular heterosexual guys have no interest in kissing/making out if it leads to no sex Were you and Jacky born on planet Jupiter? I don't understand how 2 fully grown women can be so incredibly ignorant about the nature of men. All you're doing is taking advantage and using these pathetic guys for your own attention/validation and not giving them what they want. How is that a win/win? They probably are having sex with these guys and just don't want to admit it on this forum. If the guys are actually good looking, they wouldn't do just "kiss and cuddle" with a girl who just calls them once in a while. 2
Eclypse Posted August 3, 2012 Posted August 3, 2012 There a few girls I know that have crushes on me. Should I find myself single again I know I can call them up and get laid fast. I guess I'll have to see how I feel when / if that happens. I wouldn't want to lead a girl on if she thought it might lead to more. If they're ok with it being purely casual then I'm down.
phineas Posted August 3, 2012 Posted August 3, 2012 I mean, when things are a bit slow romance wise, do you text/call your back-ups and see them? "Work has been crazy lately, sorry I have been out of touch...do you want to catch up soon?" Mine know the deal and I am pretty sure they are not that into me either. Nobody gets hurt, so I don't see a problem... When I get those kinds of texts I invite them over for movie night & tell them to wear something sexy. I either get some or they stop bothering me for another 6 months. win / win in my book. 2
Imported Posted August 3, 2012 Posted August 3, 2012 he is fully aware of what it is. How am I the bad guy? I wouldn't think you were a bad "guy". I'd just think we are not compatible and not really worth putting any heart into pursuing seriously. Sure you're fun to be with though.
Author Eternal Sunshine Posted August 3, 2012 Author Posted August 3, 2012 When I get those kinds of texts I invite them over for movie night & tell them to wear something sexy. I either get some or they stop bothering me for another 6 months. win / win in my book. Sometimes, it's all they want too
Recommended Posts