El Brujo Posted August 2, 2012 Posted August 2, 2012 I don't have a problem with people who want to talk openly and loudly about crap like FWB, masturbation, sex with inanimate objects, bragging about the number of sex partners one has had, etc etc... but the extent to which uninhibited sex---orthogenital and otherwise---has all but made genuine romantic love into a taboo topic, pisses me off. THAT, I take issue with. Say the L-word, and everyone around clams up because you just committed a huge no-no. It's like announcing that you have leprosy. It doesn't surprise me that divorce rates and the number of people newly diagnosed with narcissistic personality disorder are going through the roof. Some people are so into chasing the orgasm-high (or at least trying to give others that impression) that their attitude is "me first, and to hell with everyone else---even the people I screw". I honestly believe that such people have no idea what real love is, let alone how to give and receive it. They have to have it THEIR WAY and that messed it up for those of us who once upon a time did believe in love. 6
Woggle Posted August 2, 2012 Posted August 2, 2012 People who value romance and commitment are the new radicals and subversives in this day and age. I like being a rebel. 8
xxoo Posted August 2, 2012 Posted August 2, 2012 People who value romance and commitment are the new radicals and subversives in this day and age. I like being a rebel. Me too, Woggle!
Author El Brujo Posted August 2, 2012 Author Posted August 2, 2012 In that case, consider me the world's most infamous terrorist.
mesmerized Posted August 2, 2012 Posted August 2, 2012 yeah, specially as a woman you should never bring it up with men because then you'd be considered a psycho desperate chick, true story. I think women still want love and romance just as much. Men on the other hand don't feel the need for it like women do as long as they are sexually fulfilled. 2
norajane Posted August 2, 2012 Posted August 2, 2012 God forbid you say you'd like to be married. I think you mean the "M word". People can't even say marriage anymore.
Lonely Ronin Posted August 2, 2012 Posted August 2, 2012 I think women still want love and romance just as much. Men on the other hand don't feel the need for it like women do as long as they are sexually fulfilled. You, Have been spending to much time on LS if you believe that! 3
xxoo Posted August 2, 2012 Posted August 2, 2012 Hasn't anyone been to a wedding recently? I've got a new crop of people in my life getting engaged, and marrying. It's nice to see that romantic love is still alive 1
ThaWholigan Posted August 2, 2012 Posted August 2, 2012 I believe in love and romance . Always have. 1
ThaWholigan Posted August 2, 2012 Posted August 2, 2012 Hasn't anyone been to a wedding recently? I've got a new crop of people in my life getting engaged, and marrying. It's nice to see that romantic love is still alive Yes, my cousin got married over a month ago. He was so happy, it was very joyous to see him and his lovely wife smiling together. 2
mesmerized Posted August 2, 2012 Posted August 2, 2012 You, Have been spending to much time on LS if you believe that! lol, what I said actually comes 100% from my experience with people in real. The majority of men I meet don't seem to have any need for "love". It's almost always all about sex sex sex...The situation is severe enough that I made a thread almost asking if men even have emotions 2
mesmerized Posted August 2, 2012 Posted August 2, 2012 well duh. women are drawn to men who push sex early. That's not why they do it. They do it because, in most cases, sex is truly all they want/need. 3
fortyninethousand322 Posted August 2, 2012 Posted August 2, 2012 yeah, specially as a woman you should never bring it up with men because then you'd be considered a psycho desperate chick, true story. I think women still want love and romance just as much. Men on the other hand don't feel the need for it like women do as long as they are sexually fulfilled. Disagree as strongly as humanly possible with all of this . Probably more than that. From what I see more men seek romance than women.
ThaWholigan Posted August 2, 2012 Posted August 2, 2012 That's not why they do it. They do it because, in most cases, sex is truly all they want/need. Sometimes, yeah. I wouldn't say it's as regular an occurrence. Even the most hardened guys I know who "lash & dash" ( can't believe I used that term ), have softened to the point of pure emotion.
Lonely Ronin Posted August 2, 2012 Posted August 2, 2012 lol, what I said actually comes 100% from my experience with people in real. The majority of men I meet don't seem to have any need for "love". It's almost always all about sex sex sex...The situation is severe enough that I made a thread almost asking if men even have emotions Well, then it's my opinion you are meeting the wrong type of men.
mario_C Posted August 2, 2012 Posted August 2, 2012 Hey, I like marriages - I'm a musician And a lot of us need work, as do caterers and event services and limo drivers and you get the idea.... The point of romance is that it's an unattainable ideal - your romance novel/porn dream partner doesn't exist, but we are fed this imaginary person via media on a regular basis and we want them so badly, we end up resenting the partner right there in our arms for coming up short. I've been adamant about men not complaining about women's standards, but in all fairness, we ALL need to be real about the potential and current partners in our lives if we ever want to find happiness and log out of these stupid boards forever Or not, I don't know what I'm talking about. I'm a man after all, grunt. 3
Silly_Girl Posted August 2, 2012 Posted August 2, 2012 lol, what I said actually comes 100% from my experience with people in real. The majority of men I meet don't seem to have any need for "love". It's almost always all about sex sex sex...The situation is severe enough that I made a thread almost asking if men even have emotions Can you be more picky about who you label as potential relationship material? 75% of men I interact with, maybe more, either in the dating sphere or elsewhere, clearly show they value love, commitment, or are appreciative of their wife/girlfriend and unafraid to show they love them. I feel bad for you if you're only encountering sex-obsessed robots
ThingsAreComplicated Posted August 2, 2012 Posted August 2, 2012 most relationships are asymmetrical in terms of emotions, so people are not very experienced with talking about "real romantic love" because they simply have not experienced it. But many (well maybe not on LS ) have gone through a lot in their beds so that's something they can talk about. 1
Woggle Posted August 2, 2012 Posted August 2, 2012 yeah, specially as a woman you should never bring it up with men because then you'd be considered a psycho desperate chick, true story. I think women still want love and romance just as much. Men on the other hand don't feel the need for it like women do as long as they are sexually fulfilled. This is so not true. The best way for a guy to scare a woman away is to be romantic. I do think women are a good deal less romantic than they used to be. There wouldn't be the I don't need a man attitude so prevalent in our society if that were the case. I am not saying men are any better but this is not one sided.
Woggle Posted August 2, 2012 Posted August 2, 2012 God forbid you say you'd like to be married. Men will get called beta male suckers and women will get called stepford and have their feminist credentials called into question. Like I always say I am happily married but marriage as an institution is in serious trouble in this day and age.
xxoo Posted August 2, 2012 Posted August 2, 2012 lol, what I said actually comes 100% from my experience with people in real. The majority of men I meet don't seem to have any need for "love". It's almost always all about sex sex sex...The situation is severe enough that I made a thread almost asking if men even have emotions The majority of single men, or all men? Do you meet any couples or married men? Are those men also devoid of emotion? It sounds like the single men you meet are "single for a reason" (because they want to be single.....don't you go for the really hot guys?)
mesmerized Posted August 2, 2012 Posted August 2, 2012 The majority of single men, or all men? Do you meet any couples or married men? Are those men also devoid of emotion? It sounds like the single men you meet are "single for a reason" (because they want to be single.....don't you go for the really hot guys?) The coupled up men I meet are usually coworkers and I don't ask them about their love life. I'm not going the assume just because they're in relationships they have tons of emotion. Ironically my close friends who have girlfriends/wives mostly talk to me about the sexual side of their relationship and not the emotional so who knows. And yes I go for men who are attractive, I wouldn't say "really hot". I guess it depends on one's taste. Those are the men who can get the most play and use it instead of investing a lot in one woman. The unattractive ones have to invest in one woman to get sex constantly, I wouldn't say their emotions mean much as they would be totally different if they were a little bit more attractive!
Disenchantedly Yours Posted August 2, 2012 Posted August 2, 2012 I don't have a problem with people who want to talk openly and loudly about crap like FWB, masturbation, sex with inanimate objects, bragging about the number of sex partners one has had, etc etc... but the extent to which uninhibited sex---orthogenital and otherwise---has all but made genuine romantic love into a taboo topic, pisses me off. THAT, I take issue with. Say the L-word, and everyone around clams up because you just committed a huge no-no. It's like announcing that you have leprosy. It doesn't surprise me that divorce rates and the number of people newly diagnosed with narcissistic personality disorder are going through the roof. Some people are so into chasing the orgasm-high (or at least trying to give others that impression) that their attitude is "me first, and to hell with everyone else---even the people I screw". I honestly believe that such people have no idea what real love is, let alone how to give and receive it. They have to have it THEIR WAY and that messed it up for those of us who once upon a time did believe in love. El Brujo, I am so with you. I don't remember the last time I heard people just talk about love or even regular normal old fashioned sex anymore. Whenever people talk about it it seems to be about their latest hook-up, S&M, their fantasies and the list goes on but it is rarely about just normal sex or love. I totally think we are in a time of high narcissitic personality disorder. Things like Facebook absoluetely contribute to that. I don't think it's that people don't want love, I don't think a lot of people explore that aspect of themselves if they forever are sexually self gratifying themselves. I think this is especially true with men. If you are forever using sex to appease your feeligns, you never give yourself time to explore your feelings beyond sex because you are using it to take off the edge. Dull your senses so to speak. 1
all_hail_me Posted August 2, 2012 Posted August 2, 2012 This thread is positively refreshing. I've been so confused about what has happened to the dating world after never really experiencing it in my early 20s and now discovering a world of men who are expended on wanting love and marriage. 1
Recommended Posts