Hindsight_is_20_20 Posted August 2, 2012 Posted August 2, 2012 I've posted my story before but we've been broken up for a little over two months, some days I feel better but the last two days have been hell and I have been going over the breakup in my head and how it all went down and now I'm on the verge of wanting to unblock him from everything to find out if he left me for someone else. It's eating at me so hard, and I know it would only hurt me to know but I feel at any second I'm going to have a weak moment and I'm going to go searching for this answer. I'm hurting so much right now, how do I stop this.
KatZee Posted August 2, 2012 Posted August 2, 2012 Just go and read my thread. "I Knew this day would come... FUMING" Read it and ask yourself if that's something you'd like to be experiencing right now.
Author Hindsight_is_20_20 Posted August 2, 2012 Author Posted August 2, 2012 I am so so sorry. You must be a mess right now. What piece of s***. What a complete waste of life. I'm so sorry that you're hurting like this. You don't deserve it. I think you went looking because you must have already have known deep down that this was likely. I think I know that too. Do you think knowing the truth made it worse? Eventually we all find out at some point don't we?
dannykeyz831 Posted August 2, 2012 Posted August 2, 2012 DON'T DO IT!!!!! What happens if you find out he's seeing someone else? It sure as hell won't me you feel better and if he's not, how is that going to change anything? Your still going to be broken up right? NC is the only way to go about fixing things. By unblocking him your only going to be prolonging the pain. 1
Floored Posted August 2, 2012 Posted August 2, 2012 You know that saying, "Ignorance is bliss"? Nothing good will come of knowing what he's up to, you'll only open up old wounds before they've properly healed. You think you're torn up now, imagine how you'll feel if he really is with someone. Are you in a place where you can accept that he's moved on when you haven't? It took a long time to build up what you had, and just as much, it takes time to let it fade into your memories. Don't bring it to the surface. Distract yourself, no matter how meaningless it is.
zanzi Posted August 2, 2012 Posted August 2, 2012 I found out that my ex is back with his ex from before, with a baby. Um, that was an awkward discovery outside the supermarket....
KatZee Posted August 2, 2012 Posted August 2, 2012 I am so so sorry. You must be a mess right now. What piece of s***. What a complete waste of life. I'm so sorry that you're hurting like this. You don't deserve it. I think you went looking because you must have already have known deep down that this was likely. I think I know that too. Do you think knowing the truth made it worse? Eventually we all find out at some point don't we? It's actually OK. I Knew deep down he was lying and I've moved on tremendously in these three months. So while I'm extremely angry I turned out to be RIGHT... I'm not really hurt. Plus there's way more to the story... if you wanna go back to read my updates. lmfao.
Author Hindsight_is_20_20 Posted August 2, 2012 Author Posted August 2, 2012 Just to update. I couldn't do it. I cried for a solid hour and toyed with the idea in my head. I called a friend, he told me what I needed to hear; that I need to get angry. Sometimes tough love is the only way to get me to snap out it. I mean, my ex tried to smother me with a pillow once. You think that'd be enough? I mistook it for caring. Ya I know how that sounds; I was brainwashed. I'm still not solid but the urge has lessened enough where I don't feel like I will do anything to find out what he's up to tonight. I deleted my Facebook 2 days ago. I think it was for the best. It's like this generation makes it too easy to know too much information about others. No wonder we struggle and have so many setbacks. That being said, if it weren't for the internet, I wouldn't have LS and it's helping me to be here more than anything else at this moment. I know we're all going to look back at this one day and wonder what the he** we were thinking (hopefully that day comes sooner than later). We'll all have moved on to bigger and better things. On a good day I can see this logic. I know it's true even if I can't feel it yet. Guys, thanks for the responses, it's greatly appreciated.
KatZee Posted August 2, 2012 Posted August 2, 2012 Just to update. I couldn't do it. I cried for a solid hour and toyed with the idea in my head. I called a friend, he told me what I needed to hear; that I need to get angry. Sometimes tough love is the only way to get me to snap out it. I mean, my ex tried to smother me with a pillow once. You think that'd be enough? I mistook it for caring. Ya I know how that sounds; I was brainwashed. I'm still not solid but the urge has lessened enough where I don't feel like I will do anything to find out what he's up to tonight. I deleted my Facebook 2 days ago. I think it was for the best. It's like this generation makes it too easy to know too much information about others. No wonder we struggle and have so many setbacks. That being said, if it weren't for the internet, I wouldn't have LS and it's helping me to be here more than anything else at this moment. I know we're all going to look back at this one day and wonder what the he** we were thinking (hopefully that day comes sooner than later). We'll all have moved on to bigger and better things. On a good day I can see this logic. I know it's true even if I can't feel it yet. Guys, thanks for the responses, it's greatly appreciated. Oh absolutely. You definitely need to get into the anger stage, that's when I really started moving on but you really can't stay here. When I hit the anger stage, I was in it for a good month +. And it's NOT fun. I would wake up fuming, I would walk to the shower cursing him out. I would brush my teeth mumbling and blowing foam onto my mirror. I would walk out my apartment shaking my head in disgust. I would have full on rants in my head about how crappy he is. Just last week the anger started to fade. I really don't know how or why, it just started evaporating. The anger came back today (my thread) but it honestly hit me like a freak storm, and was gone just as quickly as it came. Now I'm fine again, lmao. 1
AlexanderJames Posted August 2, 2012 Posted August 2, 2012 Anger stage is much more bareable than the sad stages. Provided you dont do anything out of anger to send yourself backwards. Dont hang around there too long though. It starts to take over who you are. Look at grumpy old folks who live alone with no friends or family to visit? Sometimes I think that theyre like that because they had their hearts broken and never let go of the hatred and eventually it became them. Feel the anger, enjoy the change, then exhaust it in a healthy way. Even if it means going back into sad mode for a while like I am, at least its one more step towards recovery under the belt.
not-a-drive-by Posted August 2, 2012 Posted August 2, 2012 Sometimes I wish I could go into the anger stage, so that I have a justified reason not to love him anymore. But it comes and goes too quickly, and all of a sudden, I don't hate him anymore. I want to hate him and get angry .
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