New man Posted August 1, 2012 Posted August 1, 2012 Hi to any1 reading,really appreciate it, sorry for length of this post-iv never posted on anything like this before. Been with girlfriend 7 years- lived together at least 6of them. *Bought a house at the wrong time- ended up with negative equity, Then bought a business for her to run which didn't go to plan and ended up losing the business and a lot of money. Debts started increasing and she's been out of work for over a year now. I did everything in my power to pay everything- working 7days a week more often than not and then the relationship started to suffer without me even realising it. I was constantly stressed about money and I think she was depressed. In the mean time her friend has been taking her out and paying for stuff and has even paid for her to go on holiday with her and some others, I wasn't particularly happy bout this due to the whole money situation and I felt it was undermining everything I was trying to do for us. *Anyway the holiday was booked and a week and a half before she was due to go on holiday, she packed up all her stuff whilst I was at work and met me at dinner time to tell me she was leaving me and didn't love me like she used to. This was a bolt from the blue ( at the time- although with hindsight it was coming) and I didn't take it very well at all. I cried and punched things and near enough begged for her not to do this to me, I calmed down then we went for a walk to try and talk, not sure what was really said during that walk but I dropped her off at her sisters and arranged to meet the next day. The next day, a few things were said, I tried to remain strong about it, whilst telling her that I thought that we potentially still had a future if we changed certain aspects of our life etc, we had a few drinks together and it really wasn't awkward at all, I asked her if she would spend the rest of the day and night with me to see if she really had lost her feelings for me or if it was just the situation that had caused all this. She would not do that but said she would go on a date with me if I wanted to. We arranged to go away for the night ( like we used to, reasonably regularly before money probs), we had a good night, got on with each other, had a laugh and had sex that night.the next morning seemed fine too, we went for some breakfast and a walk round town, I didn't buy her gifts and she bought herself some sandals for her holiday. When we got back, I gave her a lift and told her that i didnt expect a decision there and then, but she knew how I felt, but I would not wait around forever, she said she knew this and she would come and see me when she got back off holiday. Whilst on holiday I have tried to give her all the space she could care for, I haven't rung once, and all the text conversations barring one have been initiated by her, iv tried to be relaxed and make her smile/ laugh- she has been friendly and calling me babe/ baby, putting kisses on end of text, but not once told me she loves me or misses me.(neither have I though) She comes back some time tomorrow , and I haven't heard from her today and it's not looking like I'm going to, unless I tex her 1st. I feel totally confused- don't know if there is still a chance/ don't know if I deserve better. Am I just clinging on desperately or is there genuinely still hope. I'm trying my hardest not to contact her and I'm really tempted to make her wait a while to meet me when she's back. But the truth of the matter is that this has been the longest most difficult week of my life ever. Iv cried more times than I dare to admit as a grown man and I probably can't wait a moment longer than when she decides to come and meet me. I'm totally and utterly confused/ fed up/ running out of patience.
Author New man Posted August 1, 2012 Author Posted August 1, 2012 Would really appreciate somebody's input on this
Zammo25 Posted August 1, 2012 Posted August 1, 2012 When a woman falls out of love with you it almost impossible to get her back. That is my input.
Canadian731 Posted August 1, 2012 Posted August 1, 2012 You need to stop paying so much attention to her, you are making your life other then work revolve around her too much. "never let anyone but yourself have control over your emotions" I recommend waiting for her to contact you, right noe you seem very needy and that will only let her know that she is in your back pocket, she knows she can stay at her sisters and have you at her will because you want her back. Think about it this way man, put yourself in her shoes, would you really want to be with someone who is a broken man, she wants someone who can be strong in times of turmoil and get his **** together. Those are just my 2 cents, goodluck
Chi townD Posted August 1, 2012 Posted August 1, 2012 I have a theory and you're not gonna like it. She breaks up with you right before her holiday? She wanted to be free and single when she went on holiday so she wouldn't feel guilty about what might happen when she was away. If something did happen and you find out about it. You can't get mad! "Because we weren't together when it happened!" Don't you love technicalities!!
Zammo25 Posted August 1, 2012 Posted August 1, 2012 I have a theory and you're not gonna like it. She breaks up with you right before her holiday? She wanted to be free and single when she went on holiday so she wouldn't feel guilty about what might happen when she was away. If something did happen and you find out about it. You can't get mad! "Because we weren't together when it happened!" Don't you love technicalities!! This is correct. The likelihood of her getting hit on every night by numerous guys trying to get her into bed is, well , 100% really.
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