ch33zecake Posted July 31, 2012 Posted July 31, 2012 I'm going to make this short since I do not feel like writing a novel on how I met a girl. Yesterday night I confessed my feelings for this girl that I like. I told her that I'm starting to like her more and more and days go by. Then she asks me not to like her and I should like someone else. She said she likes me too and thinks I'm an awesome person. Sounds like she's putting me in friendzone. See what confuses me is that she's been telling me how she misses me when I'm gone. She wants me to be close to her and etc etc. When she told me to basically go find someone else to have feelings for, I pretty much attempted to back off of her by telling her that I should just cancel our lunch date we're going to have tomorrow (which I already had with her earlier). She got sad and told me she still wanted to see me on during the lunch date. I told her it's probably a better idea not to go anymore so that I can stop liking her. Then she got really heated and denied that she ever said anything about me moving on from her. She told me she said as of now she doesn't want me to like her because she doesn't have plans of getting into any kind of relationship right now. I swallowed my pride and apologized to her and told her I completely misunderstood her. We still went out on our lunch date which turned out to be great. We didn't bring up what we said last night. It was just a very casual kind of date. She thanked me for taking her out. That's my second time going out with her. The first time we went out she really loved it and had a whole bunch of ideas of where we could go in the future. So anyways, I don't know what to think of this whole situation. I haven't texted her at all today since our lunch date. She hasn't texted me either, but I usually initiate the conversations with her. Should I back away from her for now or attempt to exit out of the friendzone?
MrCastle Posted July 31, 2012 Posted July 31, 2012 When she said she wasn't looking for a relationship; she meant she wasn't looking for a relationship with you. She still wants your attention and still wants you to take her on intimacy free dates, but if you have self respect you'll let this one go. It could never work with you being attracted to her and her not feeling the same way for you.
John Stiles Posted July 31, 2012 Posted July 31, 2012 You haven't said how long you've known her, but it sounds like you haven't known her for long, since you talk about it being only the 2nd date. My response is based on you not knowing her for long, but if I'm wrong about that, let me know. You made a huge mistake confessing anything. First of all, you have no business having feelings for someone who you hardly know. Secondly, you don't confess anything until you're absolutely sure, and you're sure that she will respond positively. And even then, you should be subtle and not tell too much. Give her crumbs, not the whole slice. Create tension. If anyone is going to break down and confess anything, let it be her, not you. Stay in control. Everything in moderation. Keep her wanting more, and don't give her too much. If you like her, don't declare it, hint it, but leave her wondering. And here's a really good tip for you : Put her in the friendzone. Yes, her. Next time you see her, do it. Don't give her a speech, just casually mention that actually you prefer her as a friend. And then start treating her like one of your friends, and that includes winding her up, making fun of her, not trying to be romantic, just hang out with her like you don't care what she thinks. I mean, you don't worry about what your male friends think, right? Same here, act like you're so damn comfortable with her that you don't care about anything. Don't try to impress her. Don't court her. See other girls. If you see even just 1 or 2 other girls, you'll find yourself comparing them all with each other. And when you do, hopefully you'll see that this girl has low self esteem. Then you'll realise that there's no point in bothering with her, except as a friend. So just use her as practise (I mean that in a nice way). I'm sure she's a nice girl but come on, she doesn't think she deserves your admiration, that's a major indicator of low self esteem. She's not ready for anything with anyone until she sorts that out. And don't let your attraction for her cloud your judgment. Compare her with other girls immediately.
weallfalldown Posted July 31, 2012 Posted July 31, 2012 Just get in her knickers, then say bye bye...then you've won...
utterer of lies Posted July 31, 2012 Posted July 31, 2012 Yesterday night I confessed my feelings for this girl that I like. Posts that start like this never end well. Why do you guys keep doing that?
stillafool Posted July 31, 2012 Posted July 31, 2012 I told her that I'm starting to like her more and more and days go by. Then she asks me not to like her and I should like someone else. If she told you this there is no chance for a romantic relationship. Leave her alone as you cannot be her friend because of the way you feel about her. Don't waste anymore time on this one.
satyr Posted July 31, 2012 Posted July 31, 2012 Dude beware shez placing u into her friendship zone...personally i think she wants some company n wld change her mind only after a long chase frm ur side i.e.... Id personally suggest u to move on...ull find somebody better im sure
InJest Posted July 31, 2012 Posted July 31, 2012 Ignore any further contact from her, and start moving on.
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